Rants of unstable individuals

No More Readers

2006-11-05T12:15:00.000-08:00

I've been on the street a little over a year now and I don't think I've posted on time. Just too busy for all this I guess. I've seen some things and done some things but nothings all "Cops" all the time. There are slow days... I mean Slow days. But I make up the time by "running traffic" or pulling people over for minor traffic violations... Not everyone gets tickets though, I'm not that guy, I never was. It's been a great year making new friends within the Dept. and I've learned allot about people as a whole.... not that I'm all jaded and I think everyone’s evil or anything like that. No there is still a common good out there and I see it in people everyday. The only thing that's difficult about the thing is, no one calls just to say hello...

Let me explain, the only time someone calls is when things are bad and they need more help then they know how to get for themselves. No one call’s to see if we just want to come over for dinner and drinks, It’s always someone burnt the dinner and broke the glasses before we get there.

O’ well it’s all in the job description somewhere I’m sure.

In other news "C" is great, she has a new fantastic job she loves; and she's good at it too. She impresses me with the things she does everyday.

We "adopted" a cat/ kitten. No dice. I didn't ask for it or anything, the scenario went like this...

Location: Bedroom
Fade in

C: Hey wake up I have to have you take care of something.
Me: Hugh???
C: There's something in the other room I need you to take care of.
Me: Hugh?? (Still in bed sleeping)

*Crawl from bed and walk to spare room*

C: O it must be under the bed.
Me: Is it another dog?
C: Nope it's a cat.
Me: Hugh??
C: Gotta go, love you.

(Star wipe) End Scene.

So... I'll make an attempt at writing from time to time just to keep my sanity... can't promise anything on either front though.

How long has it been...

2005-12-07T04:07:00.000-08:00

So much has happened in the past two months since I've posted last.

I finished the academy.. Started on the streets.. Met tons of new people, not that they’re always as happy to see me as I am to see them. But it's all a great experience overall.

Even with all the variety in this job from day to day, I still find ways to make thing routine. I try my best to workout for about an hour about three times a week. I’m lifting and running mostly.

I'm sitting here trying to thing of a few funny things that have happened..

Oct. 31:
Reports filed that kids in a truck are “Bungee Launching Chickens” is reported.

I investigated and find the following:
Some how, some way some one is throwing whole feathered used to be live chickens at car and truck as they drive threw the Town. No suspect info.. darn the bad guy got away.

I would say that Nov. held a fairly low-key overall, nothing major happened.. I think. Some arrests on warrants, traffic stops, collision investigations. Stuff like that is day to day and pretty regular so it doesn’t seem to be anything out of the norm anymore.

BUt anyway.. I'll try not to let you guys down on the posts anymore.. that is if there are any of you guys/ girls left out there.

My live in sixty seconds

2005-08-30T19:38:00.000-07:00

Week number eleven.. Weeks are flying by.. I'm in my uniform and we started shooting last Friday, I get OC (Pepper) sprayed in two days. Apparently you can’t use it unless you know what it feels like..dammit

K gotta write a paper on high speed pursuits..

laters.. Much love

P.s. Thanks for all the comments guys it makes all the difference.

Free minute

2005-08-16T19:40:00.000-07:00

So I have a free minute to write the current goings on in the life of an Academy Recruit..

Our last day of "Mandatory Physical Conditioning" was yesterday. In academy terms this means "Now you have to workout on your own because class will be taking up that time. But you can't slack off." O' and it also means we (do)n't have to show up to the non-(mandatory) workout days that will be held during the week. But whatever it's all done in eight little weeks. We're half way there.

Funny thing about the academy,
You find yourself thanking god for the most trivial things, first we couldn't walk (We had to run) wherever we were going for the first eight weeks. Who would have ever thought that I would feel like walking would be such a privilege.. but by god it is. Here's another thing.. have you ever walked though the grass or gravel? Well, I dare you to try that shi.. while in the academy.. no really give it a shot.. it's your ass not mine.

Last great thing about the Academy.. "Memos" That right memorandums or Memos for short. We write them when it's time to tell on ourselves for some action or area of discipline. It gets sent to our class Sergeant (AKA God) then he decides based on how many of the same violation we have had what the discipline will be. This means sit-up's push-up's trail run's, and papers varying anywhere from 250 hand written word (All Caps) to 1500 words.
So, I got a memo, for not greeting the staff properly.. it wasn't that I didn't try or anything.. they were walking up and I said "Good Afternoon Staff" not bad, except it was 9am, well we where there since 5:00 so it felt like afternoon. But I corrected myself and "said good morning staff." but alas it wasn't soon enough I heard those word "Write me a memo." DAM! So I say "Sr. yes Sr." and go on my marry way. Write the memo.. but what do you title a memo like that? We have a selected titling system and non of them fit this so I waited until the end of the day.. Big Mistake.. I was told prior to asking my question.. "Mr. Rant where is your memo?" I said "Right here one my desk Sr. and I..." He cuts me off with "I'm goanna need a memo on why that memo is late."

O' FUNK!

So I wrote a memo about my memo being late.. O the joy of the Academy.. will the fun never end?

but I gotta go.. We got our money from the re-fi and I'm ripping out the carpet to put in wood.. so I'll talk to yall laters.

Paper Writen' Foo'

2005-08-02T16:25:00.000-07:00

That's what I am..
I have a great one to write on "use of Force" and how it applies to my J-O-B. We had a huge test over Criminal Law and Traffic Law as well.. Of course I passed, you doubted me? Do get me wrong it was hard as hell, but I made it through, that means I have a job at least until next Monday and that my friends is all I need to get though the day.

It was another morning workout from the ninth level of hell today. We started of with a lil' bit of a half mile run to warm up. Not to bad then onto the Physical Testing that we go though in the middle to get an idea just how much we have "Grown" in the past seven weeks. Yeah we ran our ass off yesterday during the am workout, so I wasn't top notch but I did dam good anyway. I came in third in the mile and a half run at a blazing fast 9.39, a 300 yard sprint in .39 and improved overall in everything but the agility course.

After all that I was feeling pretty good about the whole thing when BAM! it hit us. The Sergeant comes at us yelling. Apparently we left our class flag out last night (A huge mistake) and they took it in. He yells for all of us to look to the right.. up on top of that mountain over there.. yeah that's our flag.. So he says, run over to the top.. as a class, and retrieve your flag! MOVE! So we're off running up the hill, now dieing by the time I hit the top with the other guy who was with me.. We were first up the hill and so he grabbed the flag and I grabbed the base (yeah the ten plus pound base) and we wait for the rest of the class to make it up the hill. Then it's back down as a class we run back and form up in the grass beside the track.. where he continues to yell about us not addressing the staff correctly and showing proper respect blah blah balh. Then he says it.. I want you to run the mile and a half again! Fast! MOVE! SO we're out on the track running for another mile and a half (CRAP). I did that on in 11.30 flat. But what ever we had been going 100% for the past hour and a forty minutes. Then off the showers and into class for the rest of the day.. Now I'm at home and it's time to write my essay.. so I'll see ya'll laters.

I'm still here.. kinda

2005-07-21T16:10:00.000-07:00

Not to worry all you out there.. what a minute, is there any one left out there?

Well here's what's up as of late,
Academy is kicken' my ass on a daily basis. I'm up at 3 am to get to a 5:30 work out Monday through Thursday. We run streets, we run mountains, we run track. You name it I've ran it in the last five weeks. Then it's into the classroom to get my learn on for about six to seven hours. So far the best classes have been how to deal with Domestic Violence.. and Criminal law. The first because we got to go though mock situations of DV and the second because it helped in me understanding why and how we do what we do.

After a day of running around and "Yes Sir, No Sir" I love coming home and getting a little time to myself. I still have work to do when I get home.. Paper writing or studying for the tests that are given every Monday. Also I have to get my boots to mirror shine and press fresh creases into my shirts and pants for the next day. In it's own special way I'm finding comfort in the routine. All and all I get done around two hours after I get home most nights.

C__ and I have been into it a few times lately.. a few big times, and a few small times. I don't really want to go to deep into that crap though. It's just nice to have it all over and things coming back to the norm. Money's better but worse all at the same time. I'm making more and that's nice, but I'm spending a lot on stuff for the academy too, so I'm not sure it's all not just washing out in the end anyway.

We're refi-ing the house right now and that's sweet, we just got the house appraised at 226 G's which is amazing considering we only bought it last year for 136 G's. We're goanna put in new flooring upstairs and down where the dogs F_cked it all up. But it's goanna be wood and tile from now on and I couldn’t be happier about it. But it's time to hit the boot up with a coat of wax and iron the clothes out for tomorrow. So I'll see yall in a few. V I still love you do worry.. and J-mo if you still come back.. I'm tryin' my best to get to a computer every day and catch up on what's new and hot in the cold country.

Get down it's the 5-0

2005-06-07T20:16:00.000-07:00

O.. Nope that's just me in the mirror.
Everything’s going just swimmingly here in the hot country. I've been at the PD for a whole 2 day's and I think I've met about 100 new people and gotten lost in the building a total of... 2 times. Not bad all things considered.

What's new and hot? You may ask..
Well tell me if anything out there beats this..
I get paid to work out for two hours every day.. as part of my day. Sweet deal if I ever saw one. So I start the day by strolling in at 8 and heading to the locker room.. drop my work clothes off and head into the gym for a AM ass kicken workout for one. Today was treadmill for 30 min (About 4 miles) on "cross trainer" mode. Followed by a wonderful weight lifting schedule designed for me by me. Closing out with some abb killing suspended sit-ups. I don't think I've enjoyed working out more ever in my life.. Then off to the showers to cool down and get ready for the rest of the day.

About 10:00 am I rolled into the front lobby area to start out the day.. It went a little like this.. B.S. get some info about the academy B.S. meet someone new with at least six stories to tell followed by some more fantastic B.S. Then it was 4pm and time to go and have dinner with C__.

Since she's in school on Tuesdays I don't get much time with her so we met up before class for a little bite to eat. All and all it's one of my favorite parts of each week.

D Rants High Points of the day...
1. Got to drive a Squad Car.. well got to drive three of them.. O' and by the way, those things hall ass.

See I got to meet the Officer in charge of the motor pool today and he had to take some over to the depot to get serviced. So I got to be the runner. Normally not a vary glamorous job I'm sure, but I loved every minute of it.

2. Gossip moves faster in that place then a pruned up 80 year old.

Apparently we had a little case of "Resisting" and "Aggravated Assault of an Officer" (Twice).
Some guy decides it would be a good idea to hall off and hit one of the arresting Officers and run away (Not as good and idea as you may think). There was another Officer on site as well as a new Rookie on beat. So he hit the Officer and made a dash straight into being shot by a Tazer... Foolish people.. Why try.

I got to give the guy this thou. He landed one hell of a hit. The Officer had to get 14 stitches over his cheek (About nose to ear). O' well at least stupid like that can't get back out on the street to fast.

It worked!

2005-06-03T15:03:00.000-07:00

Project lazy ass was an overwhelming success in every since of the word. I felt all the joys of unemployment for two whole days.. I woke when I felt it necessary and slept whenever the need came about. I ate from time to time and found out just how many channels on TV can have absolutely nothing on all at the same time (127 to be exact).

All and all it was freaken spectacular..
Yesterday was back to.. work... Or something like it. I got there at 6am and was on "Patrol" AKA had nothing lined up for the rest of the day. Made the rounds to all the friends I had made and said my goodbyes.. went to my debriefing and turned in my badge all by 12:00. Then took 2 hours of sick time to fill out the day. But it was funny leave then I felt like I was back in high school and cutting class halfway though the day or something.. I got out and walked to my truck and drove like the devil himself was pushing me.

Today was another gold star day.. waking up at 9:30.. Hitting to road for a short run (2mile), and then back for a light workout and shower..
But wait there's more!!
Since I was starting to resemble Shaggy from Scooby Doo I headed over to get a little hair cut.

Tonight nothing is set in stone.. C__ and I have been invited out for a few drinks and we have a Grad party for P-Riddys lil' Sis on Saturday... But other than that.. it's all same ol' stuff

Geez someone turn down the excitement in here I can barley stand it..

Look fo better posts come Monday AKA First day at the PD!

Update...

2005-05-31T12:27:00.000-07:00

Working for the Man...
Last week a my current location as a security guard.
Not that it was all bad, I met some people and lured some things about big corporations and how they work. I got some time to reflect on life and how it's all unfolding, if I was happy with it and were I wanted to take it in the long run. There was no real place for me to go in the company I'm in now.. No real high pay or high reward for real effort. Hell half the time I did things to better the way things ran the only one who noticed was me.
I have today (Tuesday) and tomorrow off, my boss mans boss made me take it so I didn't lose my holiday time or sick time when I leave. Vacation times a different story all together I take that with 90 freaken hours worth.. Sweet sweet money.

Working AS the man...
I start bright and early on Monday the 6th at 8am. Doing god knows what but I have high hopes for the whole thing. That day is just filling out forms and turning in paper work.. all your regular every job kinda stuff.
But more to come on that when more is known.

This weekend was ok then neighbors had a "thing" on Sunday..
I worked first and then C__ and I headed over for a bit. Nothing major, maybe twenty people drinking and eating, just having a good time. I got home around 1am.. you know so I could sleep until 4:20 then get up for work, but you're only 23 once and I haven't used all my "stupid guy moves" tokens yet anyway. I hurt and there was a handover mixed with the better part of the morning and then it made a slow disappearing act though the afternoon.

Yesterday was work..
As usual at work at 6 until 2, then home.. Run.. eat.. pass out.

And today.. well today I sitting at home getting and paid for it. Watching TV and jumping on the Blog from time to time basically trying to do as little as possible for the next 48 hours.

Commence project lazy ass in 3...2...1

Feeling like ish..

2005-05-25T15:47:00.000-07:00

Well I can say I feel much better today. Not 100% but still a vast improvement.

Last night was a bust, C__ got home and it was like ten minutes later I was fast asleep due to my newfound friend. Then it was wake up at 4:20... hit the snooze.... hit the snooze.. O crap it's 4:40! Then up and out the door by 4:55.

Once at work I found myself in a wonderful state of A.D.D. and loving it. I embraced it and made it my own, I don't think I thought one work related thought the whole day. God I’m loving this whole final two weeks thing here.

Downside..
I was in the sweatbox of a post we call the receiving shack.
Description:
10x10 all aluminum construction with a poorly working AC unit attached to the side with.. I think duct tape.. This is a high dollar outfit here folk let me tell you.
Don't get me wrong it'll get pretty cold in this thing but the moment you open the door... *bam* all the air runs out laughing all the way (ha ha ha) and it's replaced with the dry hell air that seems to be moving into town this week.

So my list of things for the day went something like this

To Do:
1. Wake up Done
2. Make it to work Done
3. Find Lovely Blogs to entertain my brain all day long Done (Thanks all you ladies and Gents)
4. Make it home Done
5. Blog In progress
6. Eat Sometime tonight (C__'s cooking)
7. Maybe get a little
8. Sleep

Man my day is lookin' pretty packed I still have to find something to eat, I have someone to do.. I mean something to do, and then it's off to bed.

I better go get cracken'

Here's one for ya..
If you shoot a mime.. do you need a silencer?
Think about it.... it deep isn't it.

Lil' Post

2005-05-24T20:06:00.000-07:00

Just a lil post for today.

C__'s out at class and I'm home watching House on Fox. Good show overall I think, sometimes a little to much drama but what kinda show would it be if it wasn't over acted from time to time?

Today... I'm sick. My body and I had a fight and it won. I haven't been sick like this in a good five years. So what did I do? Went to work and ran when I got home. So ha ha body you ain't keppin me down, sukka'

O and my day of work consisted of reading up on all the wonderful Blogs.. a few times. Then my boss mans boss came in and we messed around with the "Speech" thing on Windows XP for about two hours. Funny as Hail man we typed all kinds of stuff into that thing. It doesn't know how to handle lots of the same lette
Example: Lets say someone types rrrrrrrrrr you would just carry the r sound for a long time but the program doesn’t get it so it says r,r,r,r,r. We found this out after typing "Me mad me break things ahrrrrr". It was freaken great times.
Now that I put in my two weeks it's like I'm a golden Child or something I can do no wrong in the eyes of the man.

O' House is back on...

O Happy Day

2005-05-23T15:04:00.000-07:00

Home again and back to the daily grind... Except...
I got my final offer from the PD today! Holy crap I can't believe they want me to work of them.. I'll have a gun... scary thought. Just kiddin. But really, I put in my Two weeks the minute after I got off the phone with the Department. I'll be starting on the 6th of next month, doing little stuff around the department until my Academy start date (July 18th).

We went to OK to have C__'s grandpas’ services and it went well, it was vary nice and big really big. There must have been 200 people strong at this thing. We stayed though Saturday instead of Wednesday like previously planned, It was much needed and C__ would have only been back to work for two days so I said F_uck it lest just stay as long as we can.
I always love going there it's nothing except wheat until the horizon in three directions, everyone waves at you as you drive by, and if your there you're family. So I did what any strapping young boy would do in my situation.. I turned into a farmer for four days, it's a way to become a kid again. It's justification to get covered in dirt, grease, and ride around in big trucks and big tractors. You know all the things us "city folk" don't do on a daily basis. That and C__'s dad really like the help and motivation he got while I was there with him. He got to teach me things and I wanted to learn from him while I was there.
But alas it was time, time to make that drive back to the hells kitchen we call home (AKA Arizona). I never want to come back when we're there, everything's slower and more friendly. But I can't live without the modern day electronics and huge grocery stores I've become so accustom to. That and C__ promised her Grandma she would never move back.. no mater what.
I think we'll try to go back this Christmas, C__'s dad said he hasn’t had one with C__ since she was 5 or 4. Her beast of a mom would never let her go. So here's hoping that we can make good things happen with that.

In other news I'm to poor to pay attention right now but all that should change rather fast since I'll be getting my normal pay check plus 90 hours of vacation on to of it *Sweet* I love that.. it'll be like a months worth of pay in only two weeks not to mention the holiday pay I'll be making on Monday while I work for time and a half. Aaahhh that somehow makes me feel all better and warm inside.

Other than that... nadda. But I will tell you this.. when the PD thing starts up be ready for some posts I'll keep you guys in the loop all the way.

Hard days

2005-05-15T18:04:00.000-07:00

Author: D-Rant Master

These are the hard days to deal with.. C__'s Grandpa passed away on Friday and they'll be having the service on Tuesday. he wasn't in any or that's what they tell us, so that's always good. My work gives 3 paid days when you loose someone in the family and I have ample time in flex holiday pay so that's not the issue. C__'s work doesn't give her any paid time off, or anything like that so when she's not at work she's not getting paid, so that's hard but we'll make it work I guess.

It's all kinda happing fast, we had to find a place to leave the dogs for the time we're gone since we live so far from everyone. First we called C__'s mom to see if she could help us out by just coming to feed and water them, and they'd just stay in the back yard. But alas that was to much for her to handle and she said no.. Who the F_ck says no I wont help you make it to you Grandfathers funeral.. what kind of evil is this woman. I let her move into my home and live with us, eat our food and this is how she repays us by saying No she's to far away to make it out once a day...

So we will be leaving them with my parents at there house for the time we're away since they said they would do anything to help. That's what you'd expect from your parents, or that's what I expect, anything to help I know not all parents are this way but mine.. always have been there for whatever we needed as children or adults. But don't get all hot and bothered, it works both ways like when my dad needed help after his surgery I was there driving him around and doing what ever needed to be done around the house for like 4 month.. did I still live at home? No but I made the drive in and help however I could because that's what you do in times of need. You help.
So after work today (Sunday) I'll be going to there house to "Dog proof" a little. Pick up the things they'll eat in the back yard and give them a few tips on care for our little ones we love so much. My only thing I can't control is my lovely little black labs passion for water and my parents have a little three tiered pond in the back yard.. Guess who's going to "cool off" in that bad boy the moment she get hot. Sweet pond water dog.

We'll be leaving to drive there at about 4 am Monday morning. Why so early you ask? O that's because its a 13 hour drive from Arizona to Oklahoma where the service is being held. We were going to fly but the cheapest fair we could find was both of us was $780.00 we have a little extra cash but not enough to make that work especially with C__ going to Physical Therapy for the past month 3 times a week at 20 bucks a pop.. tack that on to her Birthday on the 3 of this month and we're pretty tapped out at the moment.
So we'll drive to the small town in the pan handle of Oklahoma and pay our respects and say our goodbye's
It's where her Grandpa grew up where he farmed his land and where he preached as a man of God until the day he passed. He will be missed and there will be tears of sorrow mix with the tears of joy on that somber Tuesday afternoon. But I realized this when I lost my own grandparents over the course of the last four years. You cry tear of sadness for no one other than yourself and you greed to want that person to stay just a little longer in your life. But the tears of joy come only when you find the peace that you know they have finally found after so many years of pain or age maybe just time. The peace that come when you know a man that believed in the ways of God and Heaven, loving your neighbors and helping your friend was finally able to really go home.

To a wonderful Father, Grandfather, Brother, and Son we will miss you and always you will be in our harts.

The Physical Side Of Life

2005-05-15T17:59:00.000-07:00

Author: D-Rant Master

Everyday I wait for the call, I went and did the "re-test" of the physical portion of the first screening process. They just wanted to know I haven't stopped training since I got into this whole thing. I guess that's a big problem they have then people aren't ready for the physical demands of the Academy when it comes time to start. Well Ha little did they know I had been training the whole time. Never stopping always moving forward.

The test went well compared to my last time though the gauntlet

Last time the stats where:
1.5 miles in 9 min 50 sec
42 sit-up's in a min
52 push-up's
Jump a 6' wall and sprint 25yds in 7.19 seconds

This time it went a little something like
1.5 miles in 9 min 25 sec
52 sit-up's in a min
55 push-up's
Jump a 6' wall and sprint 25yds in 6.9 seconds

So it was better... Not huge but better still.

Now I've went into a different style of training all together I decided to take up a plan I found for running a 10k race...
Nike offers a sight that you can use to track progress in running it take a few minutes to set up and then you have the ability to set out a training path for you depending on your goals. I told it I'm a novice runner that wants to average a 6-ish minute mile during a 10k it said 12 weeks should get me there. Yes a 6 minute mile is a vary fast pace for a 6 mile run but that's where I used to be.. It's where I need to be to feel I've done all I can for myself.
If it works I'll let you know if not I still know that I can run 6 miles at one time... I think I may have done that once when I was 19. I was always big on short distance really fast rather than a slower steady long races.

Party Side Of Life (what D Rant has a party side)
O' yes there was parting to be done and I did it .. and well.
C__'s B day came and went last week so there had to be a party of some sort. The whole luau idea went out the freaken window when she said she really didn't want that anymore.. So I took back the stuff I had gotten and we used the dough to have a great night on the town.. We started the night at our house with P-Riddy R__ and the Neighbors we all loaded up in the neighbors new lifted F-350 quad cab (It's like going down the street in a tank). All six of us fit right in no problem it was great that meant only one poor fool had to be the DD.

Pre Party
Home
Style: Clean and stylish.. Big TV loud stereo
Music: Cable Radio you pick
Drinks: Coors light
Food: Veggie plate and toquitos (chicken)
Atmosphere: Always a good time
Rating: 10 (could there be any other?)

Drinks Consumed: 4 Coors Lights
Overall Drunkenness: Buzzin glad I'm not the driver

First Stop
Fibber McGees
Style: Irish Pub
Music: Live band bag pipes and all
Drinks: Guinness and Guinness with a side of Guinness
Food: Potato skins and other Irish seeming food.
Atmosphere: Loud, Smokey, Kinda crowded. Overall your a-typical Pub seen.
Rating: 9.5 (band guy pointed a bright blue light right at our heads)

Drinks Consumed: 4 Guinness and an Irish Car Bomb
Overall Drunkenness: Really Happy.. Kinda tipsy. Irish car bomb seems to be doing it's thing

Second Stop
Margaritavill
Style: College Club (Hip Hop Dance)
Music: Mixed by DJ
Drinks: Coors Light
Food: No
Atmosphere: Loud, Kinda crowded, bathroom smelt of things I dare not say.
Rating: 7.5 (It was nothing over the top just a place to go get lit and dance)

Drinks Consumed: 4 more Coors Lights
Overall Drunkenness: Lets just leave it at I was the best freaken dancer on the floor.. (no)

Last Call
Fat Tuesdays
Style: College Club (More of sit-down chill)
Music: Satellite Radio somewhere
Drinks: 30 different kinds of iced mixed drinks
Food: No
Atmosphere: Loud, Not vary full, yeah by now that's about as far as I could see.
Rating: 6.0 (I don't know if it was the booze or the place was just dead)

Drinks Consumed: One long island Ice tea
Overall Drunkenness: Uummmmm.. I gotta go outside now...

So that being said it was time to go, we all headed out and loaded up into the beast we have no taken to calling tiny.
I spend the better part of the way home half way out the window "feeling" the air. When I got home I remember going upstairs to "gain some composure" I pushed the clothes off the bed and sat down..

Que Morning.. My boots are still on and I'm fully dressed.

That was a good night

Recovery Prescription: 5 Mile run and a half a pizza. Does the trick every time.

What's on this Friday you say?
Party at the Neighbors.. It was Ri__'s B day and S__ is graduating this week with her BA in marketing. Yay For Her!!!

O and...

2005-05-12T18:17:00.000-07:00

I would like to tell all of you out there who used to read the infamous Ashley Girl Blog she is making a comeback but needs you.. that right you to go and show your support.. so read with caution and make sure you don’t blush that easily

(This blog is not "work friendly" if you will)

32 minutes or less or it's Free!

2005-05-12T17:44:00.000-07:00

I wrote a post all long and pretty and sent it to myself at gmail.. but alas no nothing in the mailbox to copy and paste into a wonderful and full post.

I'm sorry to all of you out there.. if there are any of you out there still.

So we'll get right into it,
the PD... still waiting to hear back about the Phsyc evaluation, and wishing I could at least get a phone call. I mean it's been like three weeks since I did the thing.

C__ and I are doing great as of late.. We're talking more and laughing more.. not sexing more but still that is to be expected we need to work on us quite a bit. She's slowly falling into the reality that I'm going to work hard on becoming a Officer and all. We had this whole issue the she didn't appreciate the fact I was going to go to a range and go shooting. So I put it off I let her win and have her way with the thing.. for then but when it was all said and done I went today anyway..
The out come,
Yours truly needs a little work on the skill part. Sure I can reload and point down range pull trigger I can even hit the target.. But I'm starting with one that's the size of a small rim of a tire. But by the time I was finishing up today it was only the size of a small plate. Huge improvement from my side of the game.

Training
I'm still training daily for the Academy. It's getting hotter out so I have to have some big endurance. I'm up to going about 4 to 5 miles every other night. Along with a couple hundred sit-ups and a bunch of push-ups.

There's allot I'll put up on Saturday since I have to work I'll get the post I can seem to find in my E-mail from my sent file at work and have P-Riddy throw it up.

You guys are all wonderful and thanks so much for still stopping by when you do it makes all the difference in the world to me.. No mater how lame it may sound.

Well I'm off to run.. 4 mile day.. 32 minutes or less.. Or your Pizza's free baby!

So I went crazy and IM'ed Myself..

2005-05-12T13:41:00.000-07:00

DRant says:
Still in Meetings?
DRant says:
I guess so
DRant says:
I'll just talk to myself then
DRant P56925 says:
So how's your day going?
DRant says:
O' mine good thanks.. and you
DRant says:
Well it's been pretty slow but at least it's my friday you know what I mean?
DRant says:
Yeah.. that's always nice.. Hey did you say you have to work on Saterday?
DRant says:
Yeah.. Collins and Sopori are on MR again
DRant says:
So what other plans do you two kid have?
DRant says:
O' Rick and Sara are having a little party on Friday.. For his B-Day and she just finished her BA in Marketing
DRantsays:
That's nice
DRant says:
yeah well I'm kinda tired of keeping both sides of this going..
DRant says:
Yeah me too
DRant says:
I'll talk to you later ok..
DRant says:
K have a good day

I feel the POWER!!

2005-04-29T16:04:00.000-07:00

Hello to all of you out there in blogger land!

And God said Let there be cable internet... and it was good! That's right I got cable internet installed today.. Finally!

I'm in heaven

I don't See any Major Problems...

2005-04-21T12:47:00.000-07:00

Seems to have been the "Unofficial Ruling" of the psychologist I saw yesterday. They evaluated my tests and asked me about my childhood.. Asked me why I've done what I've done.

It got personal.. more than I am with most people I know. So I wont go to deep into it.
I was honest with him and with myself, it took an hour and about fifteen minutes to go though it all and when he was done, he gave the A typical response to the close of the session "I don't See any Major Problems..." I assume that it went well since my Medical is still on for tomorrow.
That and at the end he asked if I was still being active. I said yes I run at least 1.5 to 2 Miles a day and he said, "good because the academy is vary physically demanding."

So to all you out there, sorry but I'm not crazy. Or maybe I'm just crazy enough...

Good luck to me I'm off to my medical exam for a mind numbing 9 am two plus hour long appointment tomorrow, so light workout tonight and lots of rest is the plan. That and I hope I'm not to crabby with not being able to eat for 12 hours before the appointment. The night shouldn't be bad but the morning will be the death of me for sure.

Not to worry all you out there I'll be able to post after I leave my current position. With C__ going back to school and some of her weekly work having to be done via the internet, it give me ample justification to get hooked up nice and fast. That and with my substantial raise.. the money side won't any the problem. All good things.

That's all of that no onto..

Me And C__
We're doing good, she's a little scared of me "becoming" a police officer.. because that's what happens you don't just go to works as a police officer, you become one.. all the time 24/7/365 (364 leap year only). She thinks she'll lose part of me in that, and I'm sure there will be times when yes I won't want to tell her about the things that transpired in my day, but also there will be times when I can't wait to tell her the difference that was made because I was there at the right time or when someone needed me.

Well, I started planning a surprise party for her 22 B-Day (It's really on the 3 of May) since her 21st sucked pretty bad (Yes partly my fault). I think I'm goanna pick up all the stuff to do a Luau, it sounds like a good time and I can score all the stuff at the party store or someplace like that. So I'm picking up a bunch of Grass skirts for the table and breakfast bar, coconuts, tikki stuff, and try to get at least 20 people there for it. Not sure what going on the Menu yet, but as always it will be great.
Any ideas would be welcome.

My Mission.. to be the 5-0

2005-04-19T07:33:00.000-07:00

Update 4-19-05
Location: Front Desk
Time: 6:20 am
Status...
First things first.. I got my "Conditional offer" from the PD yesterday! It's conditional because I still have to pass the Phsyc evaluation and the Medical eval too. But then it's smooth sailing until the academy date. Tentatively set for the 16 of May
I had the pleasure of taking the Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory 2 or the MMPI-2 last Friday.. What is this fun filled event you may ask yourself as I did?
Well...
Cheryl L. Karp, Ph.D.
Leonard Karp, J.D.
Had this to say about it,
The MMPI is the most frequently used clinical test. Therefore, it is employed quite often in court cases to provide personality information on defendants or litigants in which psychological adjustment factors are pertinent to resolution of the case. It is easy to administer and provides an objective measure of personality. Since it is such a well-researched and highly reliable instrument, it is often used in custody evaluations. It provides clear, valid descriptions of people's problems, symptoms, and characteristics in broadly accepted clinical language. The profiles are easy to explain in court and appear to be relatively easy for people to understand. However, with any psychological instrument, it is important to acquaint yourself with the background of the test and to acquaint yourself with the assets and liabilities of any test used to assess your client.

It Evaluates and places you into multiple categories and ratings within each category depending on your answer to a question in a True of False fashion.
I.E.
"I like Big Read Fire Trucks" if you do like them you would answer True if you don't you would answer False.
So I went though and answered all 567 questions.. Yeah that's 567 question. It took the better part of two and a half hours to complete.
I meet with a Physiologist tomorrow (Wed 4/20) at 11:00 am, so I'm working half day that day. Then it's two plus hours with the Doc talking about every little thing in my life good bad or indifferent.
After this it's one more step.. the Medical exam, it's on Friday at 9 am. I have to fast for at least 12 hours before I go, and she told me to wear comfortable clothes..
I grabbed the list of categories they use they're listed below feel free to see how you would do.

Clinical Scales:

Scale 1: Hypochondriasis (Hs) - This scale was originally developed to identify patients who manifested a pattern of symptoms associated with the label of hypochondriasis. A wide variety of vague and nonspecific complaints about bodily functioning are tapped by the 32 items. All the items on this scale deal with somatic concerns or with general physical competence. Scale 1 is designed to assess a neurotic concern over bodily functioning. A person who is actually physically ill will obtain only a moderate elevation on Scale 1. These people will endorse their legitimate physical complaints, but will not endorse the entire gamut of vague physical complaints tapped by this scale. All but one of the original items were retained on the MMPI-2.

Scale 2: Depression (D) - This scale was originally developed to assess symptomatic depression. The primary characteristics of symptomatic depression are poor morale, lack of hope in the future, and a general dissatisfaction with one's own life situation. Very elevated scores on this scale may suggest clinical depression, while more moderate scores tend to indicate a general attitude or life-style characterized by poor morale and lack of involvement. Of the original 60 items, 57 have been retained in MMPI-2.

Scale 3: Hysteria (Hy) - This scale was developed to identify patients who demonstrated hysterical reactions to stress situations. All 60 original items have been retained in the MMPI-2. Items in Scale 3 consist of two general types: items reflecting specific somatic complaints and items that show that the client considers himself or herself well socialized and adjusted. Such people generally maintain a facade of superior adjustment and only when they are under stress does their proneness to develop conversion-type symptoms as a means of resolving conflict and avoiding responsibility appear. Scale 3 scores are related to intellectual ability, educational background, and social class. Brighter, better-educated persons of a higher social class tend to score higher on the scale. In addition, high scores are much more common among women than among men in both normal and psychiatric populations.

Scale 4: Psychopathic Deviate (Pd) - This scale was originally developed to identify patients diagnosed as psychopathic personality, asocial or amoral type. General social maladjustment and the absence of strongly pleasant experiences are assessed by the 50 items included in Scale 4. Scores on Scale 4 tend to be related to age, with adolescents and college students often scoring in a T-score range of 55 to 60. Black respondents have also been reported to score higher than white persons on Scale 4. Scale 4 can be thought of as a measure of rebelliousness, with higher scores indicating rebellion and lower scores indicating an acceptance of authority and the status quo. High scorers are very likely to be diagnosed as having some form of personality disorder, but are unlikely to receive a psychotic diagnosis. Low scorers are generally described as conventional, conforming, and submissive. All 50 items in the original scale have been retained in the MMPI-2.

Scale 5: Masculinity-Femininity (Mf) - Scale 5 was originally developed by Hathaway and McKinley to identify homosexual invert males. The test authors identified only a very small number of items that differentiated homosexual from heterosexual males. Scores on this scale are related to intelligence, education, and socioeconomic status. It is not uncommon for male college students and other college-educated males to obtain T-scores in the 60 to 65 range. Scores that are markedly higher than expected for males, based on the persons' intelligence, education, and social class should suggest the possibility of sexual concerns and problems. High scores are very uncommon among females. When they are encountered, they generally indicate rejection of the traditional female role. Of the 60 items in the original scale 5, 56 have been maintained in the MMPI-2.

Scale 6: Paranoia (Pa) - This scale was originally developed to identify patients who were judged to have paranoid symptoms such as ideas of reference, feelings of persecution, grandiose self-concepts, suspiciousness, excessive sensitivity, and rigid opinions and attitudes. Persons who score high on this scale usually have paranoid symptoms. All 40 items in the original scale have been maintained in the MMPI-2.

Scale 7: Psychasthenia (Pt) - This scale was originally developed to measure the general symptomatic pattern labeled psychasthenia. This diagnostic label is not commonly used today. Among currently popular diagnostic categories, the obsessive-compulsive disorder probably is closest to the original psychasthenia label. Psychasthenia was originally characterized by excessive doubts, compulsions, obsessions, and unreasonable fears. The person suffering from psychasthenia had an inability to resist specific actions or thoughts regardless of their maladaptive nature. In addition to obsessive-compulsive features, this scale taps abnormal fears, self-criticism, difficulties in concentration, and guilt feelings. The anxiety assessed by this scale is of a long-term nature or trait anxiety, although the scale is somewhat responsive to situational stress as well. All 48 items from the original scale have been maintained in the MMPI-2.

Scale 8: Schizophrenia (Sc) - This scale was originally developed to identify patients diagnosed as schizophrenic. All 78 items in the original scale have been maintained in the MMPI-2. The items in this scale assess a wide variety of content areas, including bizarre thought processes and peculiar perceptions, social alienation, poor familial relationships, difficulties in concentration and impulse control, lack of deep interests, disturbing questions of self-worth and self-identity, and sexual difficulties. Misinterpretations of reality, delusions, and hallucinations may be present. Ambivalent or constricted emotional responsiveness is common. Behavior may be withdrawn, aggressive, or bizarre. Scale 8 is probably the single most difficult scale to interpret in isolation because of the variety of factors that can result in an elevated score. Scores on this scale are related to age and to race. Adolescents and college students often obtain T-scores in a range of 50 to 60, perhaps reflecting the turmoil associated with that period in life. Black subjects, particularly males, tend to score higher than white subjects, perhaps suggesting the alienation and social estrangement felt by many blacks.

Scale 9: Hypomania (Ma) - This scale was originally developed to identify psychiatric patients manifesting hypomanic symptoms. Hypomania is characterized by elevated mood, accelerated speech and motor activity, irritability, flight of ideas, and brief periods of depression. Some of the 46 items deal specifically with features of hypomanic disturbance, while others cover topics such as family relationships, moral values and attitudes, and physical or bodily concerns. Scores on this scale are clearly related to age and to race, with adolescents and college students typically obtaining scores in a T-score range of 55 to 60, while elderly persons often achieve scores below a T-score of 50. Black persons typically score higher than white persons on the scale, often scoring in a T-score range of 55 to 65. All 46 items in the original scale have been maintained in the MMPI-2.

Scale 0: Social Introversion (Si) - Scale ) was developed later than the other clinical scales, but it has come to be treated as a standard clinical scale. This scale was originally designed to assess a person's tendency to withdraw from social contacts and responsibilities. All but one of the 70 items in the original scale have been maintained in the MMPI-2. The items on this scale are of two general types. One group of items deals with social participation, while the other group deals with general neurotic maladjustment and self-depreciation. High scorers are generally seen as socially introverted, while low scorers tend to be sociable and extroverted. High scorers are very insecure and uncomfortable in social situations. They tend to be shy, reserved, timid, and retiring, while low scorers tend to be outgoing, gregarious, friendly, and talkative.

Sometimes it all works out.

2005-04-18T12:15:00.000-07:00

So for about the last hour I've been sitting here starving just waiting for the day to come to a close (It's about noon so two hours left). At this job we do a strait eight (Eight hours of work with no break/lunch) and sometimes that gets a little hard. Sometimes you need to be able to unwind and get away for a half and hour from all the BS that comes with being low man in the food chain. I have no delusions of grandeur about this position. In the pay scale I think there may be one or two pay classes under my own, and have know idea who would be in them or if they just have them so we aren't last in line. About ten minutes ago I was looking at a pizza menu pretty hard and thinking of giving them a call to feed me food craving.. Because if you can't get to the food, have the food delivered to you, right. So long internal battle later I decoded it would be better if I just sucked it up for a couple of hour until I got off work and went home.. eat there, it's cheaper. My logic was sound and I stood firm on my commitment.
Until.. dun dun dunnnn in walks the Pizza Hut guy carrying a pizza and for a lady who runs down from the second floor. They exchange pleasantries he hands her a little personal pizza.. but wait she already has one? What's going on here? Balh blah blah, all things said she got the wrong pizza last time, so now she has one she doesn't want *Looking..Looking...Looking* Then it happened she say the lowly little security guard sitting at his little front desk all beaten and starving. She said "Hey now I got two and one has pepperoni on it.. and I'm a Vegetarian. You want it?" Some how I feel it would be some kind of sin ageist god or the gods of pizza or someone if I didn't take this as a sign.. I was meant to eat pizza for lunch today. So I graciously accept her offer and thank her. Then bam I feel like a little pepperoni pizza calibration is in order.
Just thought I would let you guys in on my little slice of heaven.. get it?? Har har slice of heaven.. but I mean pizza... O' forget it.

I can hear an echo.. echo.. echo

2005-04-11T10:52:00.000-07:00

So we don't frequent this place much any more... Sure I still start here every time I go out into the bloggers universe that I have built into my everyday life. But the whole takes like a week to post by E-Mail thing kinda gets on my nerves. It's like sending a letter in reply to and IM.
I went to my Poly test last week.. confessed every thing ever did.. and maybe even a few things I didn't do just to cover all my bases. I took a little over and hour and a half to recount every out of place detail in my life.

They where all those questions that you never thought you'd be asked in your whole life, at least not by anyone you didn't know for at least longer than the past hour.

The examiner explained all the equipment and hooked me in to the gear got all ready to go and we where off to the races... no really. He started simple like Is this the USA? Or is you name you correct name? Stuff like that. While after about three minutes in I started feeling the two straps they put around your chest to measure your breathing rate and a few other things. It felt like it was getting tighter or something and I started breathing harder. He looks up and says, "You're breathing a little eradicly you'll need to calm down.. if you can't I'll have to assume you're being deviant and we'll have to stop." Great just great we didn't even get started and I'm already goanna get kicked out for being a basket case about this whole poly thing, that or they'll think I'm a liar. So we had to stop and start over after a few minutes of calming down. The whole time I felt like my heart was beating out of my chest like in one of those corny cartoons, hands where sweating mike mad, and the blood pressure cuff was turning my arm the most wonderful shade of blue/purple.
Then it was done.. he said I'll give my report to the back ground investigator and thank you for coming. Do you have any questions?
I couldn't resist asking how I did.. I knew the answer already. He said I can't tell you that without making a full report about it and truing it into the investigator. But.... (I thought O' God there's a but.. here it comes)
He said but if I would have had an answer that I thought you we being untruthful about I would have asked if there was any other way to ask it or if you had anything more to tell me about it.
Thank God it was a good but not a bad but. So I asked how long it was going to take to get the report all finalized and submitted? He said maybe by Friday. So now it's back to waiting blindly for the next step.. when and where ever it may be.

TGIT?

2005-03-31T11:53:00.000-08:00

O Thursday.. Thanks the gods you are here again.
So big things are happening in the life of me.. should anyone read this anymore. Bolgger has a way of waiting a few days to post anything I E-mail in.
C__'s grandpa has had everyone all up and worried for weeks now. He has been transferred to a new hospital where they can give him dialysis and figure out what went wrong with the operation he had. They think he was given the wrong food and it tore the suechers in his intestine.. that's why he got all sick and is where he is now... But they're doing everything they can for him and that's good. They went from saying call in the Minister to.. maybe he'll be ready to go home in a few days. But still C__ might have to go back again.. that's another 300 bucks and x number of days without pay. If I had to go, I would get paid so that doesn't worry me so much.
But money we can always make so whatever about that whole mess.

I sat and talked with Boss mans boss for about an hour yesterday.. He's really "good people" if you know what I mean.. no really he is. He know that this company can't always offer the best opportunities and is willing to give advice and insight on how to better handle any situation. So we talked about other opportunities within the company and opportunities outside the company. About school and furthering my education.
He even sent an E-mail to one of our sister companies and dropped my name to their head of operational security.
All and all I felt pretty good about my current situation, so I headed out to my car, looked and my phone and what do I see, A message... for me? I didn't know the number but I had a voice mail so I checked it out and guess who it was.. not one other than the Police Department I tried out for back in February!
It said,
"Hello my name is ... and I'll be handling your one on one background investigation.. We will need to set up a time where you can come in for that and a poly test. Please call me back at ### -####. So I pull over and take a minute, call her back and... Damit voicemail! Of course!
I left my message and she called back about 20 minutes later. I have my One on one at 3 o clock today.. and my poly on Tuesday at 1:30... So this means on to the next step.. I called everyone and their freaken mom and told them about it. But I still fight back the excitement so as to not get ahead of myself.
O and I was 5 minutes lat to work this morning... stupid commute, o and I woke up 30 minutes late.. but we won't look at that.. hehe. I got a call from my boss man when I walked in.. "Do you want to work on next Saturday?" Well not really... "Ok well see you next Saturday then!" K, thanks.
But now that I think about it, it's not like we can't use the dough right now, so maybe it's a good thing.
Other than that.. C__ and I are doing ok.. we are still working out some things, and choosing to let some thing stay dead issues. But we'll be ok, I think.

So I think I'm just goanna sit back and watch this wind day blow by.. ya'll take care and drop a line anytime.. Just so you know..Even if I don't comment I still read everyone's blog everyday

O' and an early congrats to Beer the Rock and V on their wedding bliss.. Your Shinning Blogger marriage will be an example for us all.

A Tribute to a Memory

2005-03-22T08:19:00.000-08:00

Growing up I lived about a hundred yard from my Grandparents on my moms side.. My grandpa sold all his land to his children as they became old enough to buy it. So it was a aunt on both side and grandma and grandpa's house back and to the right.

Their house never changed....

I was a two story home with a detached garage.
It was white with a barn red trim going all the way around, with a gray shingled roof.. Large thirty yearn old pines and oak trees surrounded the house, what used to be a wind break on stormy nights. The garage held all things from a old 1950 all original Chevy truck to the old discharged bikes my grandpa would collect and rebuild so the all the grand kids would always have something to ride no matter how far away they lived.

I'll walk you through.

First things first, you never use the front door, I don't think I went though it the entire time I live near them for almost 13 years. So in the back door to the porch. On the right is flowers and a few boxes that never moved, to the left a cooling pie or two. Usually a blueberry and a Strawberry rhubarb. The smell of pie gives way to the sent of fresh bread as you walk to from the porch to the kitchen. It was the warmest yellow with the cabinets and sink on the right and a table big enough to seat a full seven maybe eight people on nights when everyone would come out to play yatizee (Like poker.. but with dice instead). Keep walking and you would find yourself in the "Formal Dinning room" it was full of all things delicate and off limits to anyone under twenty five, but who of us didn't go in there anyway just to look at it all. Through a large doorway to the left was the living room where the console TV sat next to a huge stereo credenza with all the modern electronics of the seventies. Complete with Record, eight track and AM/FM radio. The couches where brown, and made of some sort of poly weave that I could never figure out. One sofa on the right side of the room and one on the left. No one sat on this one as it was where grandpa went so catch up on his sleep every afternoon. Next to that soft sat a phone chair. For all of you who don't know what this is, back what phones where attached to the wall you needed somewhere to sit down, this is what that was for. There was an avocado colored rotary phone that was there for at least 12 of the 13 years I was there.

The master bedroom was though the hall, It was carpeted in the most plush purple carpet you've ever seen, the furniture was old and classic flawlessly cared for and a warm ware had happened to the corners and handles over the course of time. Next to that was the bathroom it held nothing out of the ordinary, but at the same time was everything you could ever need.

Going up the narrow stairway to the second floor it had one landing and about seven more stairs after that. Once one the second floor there was a room on the right to small to be a bed room but still to large to be a closet. I never did find out what it was for. Straight ahead the first bedroom. It was large enough to hold four twin size beds with ample room to be apart with your own dresser and night stand. Next to that room was a smaller room with a full bed its own closet and dresser along with a vanity to get ready at every morning. The last bedroom was almost identical in size and contents except the bed was a queen instead.
The rooms where all full of windows as there wasn't any AC when the home was built so on those warm Minnesota night you could open them and catch a breeze on a still night.

No old home is complete without the scary basement.. and let me tell you this house had that in spades my friend. It was dark and poorly lit, the walls were unpainted and cold. It was full of all manner of random items acquired over the course of time. But what made it wonderful was the fact that my grandpa used this area has his indoor shop of sorts.. He would get old blenders toasters and other things taking them apart and tinkering around until god knows when at night. That and that's also where the fridge full of coke, 7 up, orange soda, and root beer would be until I moved. That was all well and good but nothing compared to the Cellar that was though a door behind the stairs.. I think I opened it once.. maybe twice the entire time I was there.

This was a place where I was safe and happy for a long time. But in 99 both my grandpa and grandma passed away within two weeks of one another. It's wasn't a time to feel bad, their lives where long and full they had nine children and countless grandchildren. My grandpa was 97 and my grandma... well she was in her late eighties by then. When they passed all their children split the contents of the house to all four corners of the globe.. I have an original piece of the first Golden gate bridge, that used to sit proudly in the dinning room. My parent now hold for me the Grandfather clock the sat in the living room and I will get it when it is time. The house was sold and remodeled and sold once more, it's different inside and out.. but my memory's the same.

In memory of my Grandparents.. They Lived together loved together and left together.

What's Next?

2005-03-22T06:45:00.000-08:00

Alright god.. it's time for a sit down..

I have a few things to talk to you about.
Relationships
What's the deal with that anyway, how do you find the humor in what these things are. They're full of turmoil and compromise, Happiness and bouts of frustration. How do you expect two people to work as one?
See C__'s and my relationship is full of it's up and downs, but still we stay the course. Not because I don't think I can't go out and find something new or that she can't either. We're both attractive people in our early twenties, we both have dreams and wants that we look to peruse secretly but still meat in the middle every day and reach a common understanding about how are feelings for each other are stronger than any other thing that could threaten to rip us apart.

C__ and I are doing good again, but this time feels different. This time feels more true not only to myself but also to C__. I think, just as she held things back from me, I too did the same with her. Or maybe I thought I did the same for her. Somehow thinking that holding back the truth would be the better option, better than facing what could be something that we might just have to agree to disagree on.

So god the scores
You: 1
People:0

Money
Every time I try to get ahead you seem to find a way to throw a hip check in there and kick me back down to the way I was before I started.
Example:
C__ and I took out a small loan to pay off all our other small loans. Obviously I took out a little more than I needed so we would be able to do a few things we've been wanting to do as well as a few thing that needed to be done. All things considered be had about $500.00 left over the top after paying the other tings off. So what happens? C__ needs 3 of her five tires replaced so that ran a cool $340 to replace them. Side note, WTF why does three molded pieces of rubber cost so much?
Any way that still left a little chunk to work with, C__ could get a new pair of pants and I could pick up some new shoes... maybe.

And Then...

Bam out of left field we get a call.
C__ grandpa and her fathers side is in the hospital.. two states away. They've found cancer in his intestines and have taken about two feet out. But while in there they did a little extra and also found some in his limp nods.. So things aren't in a good way for the old guy. He's a wonderful person, one of the best people I have ever had the pleasure of spending time with no matter how brief that time may have been.
He's a Baptist preacher in a tinny town in OK, The church is like a hundred years old and the average attendance if ten or so. It's the kind of place where you have fish fries when someone "special" is in from out of town. Where everyone reads and everyone sings.. you don't have a collection, but donations are always welcome in any shape or size.
I'm no man of god nor do I frequent church with the exception of Christmas and Easter.. maybe. But He's the type of man you would go for, just to here him speak about his passion and life. He has never forced god on a single soul in his life and doesn't try to. He comes with the belief that if you do believe in it all than you do, if you don't.. well then you don't.

So we got the call on Friday and I had C__'s ticket to fly by Sunday morning. She fly on this Wednesday and comes home on a Sunday..

It will cost us the rest of what we had over the top and a little of what we didn't have.. But it's all worth it.

I only have one grand parent left now, and have lost four (Grandpa on dads side divorced and remarried).
You never know how much time you didn't have until that time has been taken from you. I used to drive by my grandpa's house every day on the way home from work, and how many times did I stop? Once, maybe twice. All that time I lost leaning anything about him about the way he lived is now gone.
I won't let C__ make the same mistake I did. So I'll do whatever I have to get her to him and give her the chance to learn something from a man who has done amazing things with his life and so many other peoples lives too.

and
More to come.

It's Simple, Just get married..

2005-03-20T03:28:00.000-08:00

C__ and I sat down and had a long talk about us and how we need to work as a couple on being individuals.. If we were still planning on being a couple that is.
I told her I love spending time with her, and when I choose to do something different it's not my way of saying I don't want any time with her. We agreed it was time to start talking again. Not only about the bills, what's for dinner, why we're not going out or the everyday along with all that stuff we've have become so accustom to rambling to each other, all while neither of us truly listens to what the other is saying.

She had told me, she "plays happy" sometimes instead of showing how she feels truly..
We agreed together that doing that might be a better way to hurt what we're trying to have instead of helping it. So all and all we'll make it.. I have faith in this seemingly unwavering bond we share, It carries us and is what pulls us through even when sometimes yes the simple thing would be to walk out the door.

Sometimes the simple thing... isn't the right thing...

Blogger and E-Mail

2005-03-18T14:04:00.000-08:00

Apparently My work E-Mail and blogger don’t get along. It keeps returning to sender all my posts.. A-Hole
But don't worry the man can't hold me down!

It's Simple, Just get married..

2005-03-18T13:59:00.000-08:00

C__ and I sat down and had a long talk about us and how we need to
work as a couple on being individuals.. If we were still planning on
being a couple that is.
I told her I love spending time with her, and when I choose to do
something different it's not my way of saying I don't want any time
with her. We agreed it was time to start talking again. Not only
about the bills, what's for dinner, why we're not going out or the
everyday along with all that stuff we've have become so accustom to
rambling to each other, all while neither of us truly listens to what
the other is saying.

She had told me, she "plays happy" sometimes instead of showing how
she feels truly..
We agreed together that doing that might be a better way to hurt what
we're trying to have instead of helping it. So all and all we'll make
it.. I have faith in this seemingly unwavering bond we share, It
carries us and is what pulls us through even when sometimes yes the
simple thing would be to walk out the door.

Sometimes the simple thing... isn't the right thing...

It had potential...

2005-03-18T10:35:00.000-08:00

Yesterday that is,
Since I know you're all up on my work week, Thursday is usually my Friday due to the fact I work Sunday through Thursday.. But alas here I sit on a O' so nice Friday morning.. in a freaken shack. This is goanna be the death of me I swear.

Last night was uneventful in large amounts, I drove home stopped at the store on the way and picked up some beer, the incredible (I went to school for animation, back off), and went home to cook up some brauts on the grill.

I had to go to the store and get some beer worthy of celebrating the splendor that was St. Patrick's Day, and what better beer to get then Guinness. We keep Coors in the fridge, it's the stander beer for everyday use around here..
Knowing I had to wake up at 4:20 the next morning my limit was rather low. So I opened one and poured it into the wonderful pilsner glasses that I bought when I was into socking my "at home bar." When you live a good 25 minutes from the nearest bar, you better have a backup plan for boozen it up.. my plan was, if you can't go to the bar, bring the bar to you. All things considered it works just fine.
So I made a little pasta, with a light tomato sauce on it, some brauts on the grill and had toast to the great people who brought you all things green, dark beers, and lucky charms (maybe not the last one).

C__ got home right about when everything was finishing up, so we had a little bit to eat, I poured my second Guinness and we went to play a little PS2, it sounds kinda funny I know, but it make for a good outlet, we talked, and laughed, had a genuinely good time. After that we took the dogs out fir a little walk for about 30 minutes and talked more, about lots of stuff, more than I think we've talking in months. By then it was about 9:30, since I have to get up so early I think of everything compared to hours of sleep remaining so by now I was at just under the seven hour mark. So we headed upstairs and took the movie I had bought to fall asleep to.. Not the best of ideas we have had, it turned out to be a good movie, so I didn't fall asleep until some time after 11:30 or under 5 hours of sleep. Buzzzz 4:20am my eye's feel heavy and I hit the snooze *black out period* Buzzz 4:30. Snooze one more time? Sounds good to me, I can get ready in like ten minutes or less.

(Background story)
I don't know how many of you have a dog in you home.. But ours are treated as good as any human could hope for. They can be on the sofa's with us, they eat when we eat, and sissy (our Boarder Collie) sleeps at C__'s feet every night. Challula (Lab and Rottie mix) is another story. She likes her space while sleeping in the first part of the night she'll sleep under the window. But around 3am every mourning she jumps up into the bed and lays down between C__ and I, we're used to it so it's no big thing.

Anyway back to the point, I had made my choice to stay in bed another ten minutes, apparently Challula had different plans, she normally take my spot when I get up, well today she wasn't in the mood for waiting around. She jumped up between C__ and me, laid down and pushed with all four feet until I was about to fall of the bed. That's right my dog kicked me out of bed this morning. Great way to wake up on your Saturday morning.

Has anyone else out there ever been scheduled for Over Time without being asked? That's why I'm here today, I was scheduled, but never asked, there were just like, "Here you go you have OT this day." O' well it's time and a half, and all I would have been doing was sleeping the first part away anyway, right?

Marriage is Bliss...

2005-03-17T08:56:00.000-08:00

Marriage isn't bliss, it's not a walk down a well lit path on a clear starry night. There are no hand book or how to guides. Sure they sell things claming to be the answer to your problems. "Read my book, and you'll have the perfect marriage." There is no perfect marriage, just the one you make. But in the end all the help books and other crap.. it's all just a band aid if you can't get better as a couple and find each other not only as the other half to the equation that is marriage but also as individuals working together to make it though this sometimes hellashious life.

C__ and I sat down and had a long talk about us and how we need to work as a couple on being individuals.. If we were still planning on being a couple that is.
I told her I love spending time with her, and when I choose to do something different it's not my way of saying I don't want any time with her. We agreed it was time to start talking again. Not only about the bills, what's for dinner, why we're not going out or the everyday along with all that stuff we've have become so accustom to rambling to each other, all while neither of us truly listens to what the other is saying.

She had told me, she "plays happy" sometimes instead of showing how she feels truly..
We agreed together that doing that might be a better way to hurt what we're trying to have instead of helping it. So all and all we'll make it.. I have faith in this seemingly unwavering bond we share, It carries us and is what pulls us through even when sometimes yes the simple thing would be to walk out the door.

Sometimes the simple thing... isn't the right thing...

Question...

2005-03-11T15:14:00.000-08:00

What would you do for a Klondike Bar?

Relationship Repair Kit

2005-03-09T09:17:00.000-08:00

I obsess over the thing I can control.. and ignore the things I can't.

C__ and I got into it again last night and I won't delve too deep into it. But it made me look at what we have turned into over the past year. To the rest of the world we're the Normal Rockwell painting of married couple.. But under it all we've become different I look at C__ differently and she doesn't see me the same either. She tells me I don't put forth effort anymore, and I know I do but when you've been with someone for six years you've pretty much used up all of you're really good lines already. So everything you used to say to take her off her feet now is just "the same old line." Saying "I love you" still means "I love you," but the effect is somehow different now, before it made my heart jump and now it's more of a hello. Things are implied at this point, I have duties and she expects things from me and I from her, but it feels like hers are to be done without telling me what they are. We walk away angry with each other and it's ok to have a whole day of "cooling down time." Things where never like this before.. We didn't need cool down time, we didn't even need time apart.. ever. But now it feel good get away sometimes and spread my wings, not stay away but just do my own thing.. And I think C__ gets scared by it, she thinks it means I don't want to spend time with her or don't need her to have a good time.. True I might have a better time working on a project that I know she finds no interest in if she's not there but that's only because I hope she is only out doing the same thing, doing something she likes that maybe I don't find pleasure in.. But she makes it feel like when I'm out she's just sitting at home like a lost puppy until I get back.. So should I feel bad about doing other things then? Is it my fault she won't find passion in things that don't include me?

Obviously how we are on a emotional level is effecting our.... other areas of the relationship as well, so that side of life has also been a little shall we say bland and uneventful. This also creates tension, she tells me it's my fault we are this way too. And that I must be "gettin' it some somewhere." Now I don't know how the rest of the population works, but when I hear that it doesn't exactly "get the juice flowin," if you know what I mean. We're not close and haven't been in.. well I won't go that, but it's been a while now.

I strive to shape myself, while I cannot control my ever changing relationship with C__. I focus on the outside making it strong and as attractive a possible.. It's easy for me now, I just workout and spend a little time in the sun, drop a few pound or pick them up. But I feel I've become more dependent on my workout every-other-day routine due to it's consistency, I know I'll do it, I know I'll push myself, and I'll make the changes to me to get what I want from myself. But it's different with C__ and me. I make changes but I don't see the change I don't feel the change. I'm not in her head, and can't see what she sees. I don't know what she wants to hear when she asks if she's looking good.. If I say "Do I look good" and she says, "yes you look good." This confirms my question and I feel validated for it. But if she asks "do I look good," well that's a whole different ballgame all together, I have to instantly comprise a sonnet just for her, encapsulating all the beauty that is her. The soft supple look of her skin the slight curl of her hair, the gentle song in her voice as she speaks, I could go on, but no, see it's all the same old stuff that has been in books and poems for ages nothing new nothing fresh to bring to the table. So we become bland, and look at what used to be great as mundane or routine living, and loving.

She asks me "How am I going to fix this." Is if, of course I know how to make things right again and I've been keeping the "Rules of a relationship" book all to myself. That and "fixing" something to me tends to mean it's a tangible item ,that I can asses what damage has been done to it and order or craft some kind of replacement part for it. This is different, C__'s trust in me is less because she feels my staying out all night was a way to hurt her and damage what we have. Not that I just got to drunk to make it home, nor call since I was indisposed (passed out) from the time we left P-Riddys house until the next day. Not to mention the last time I checked, Target doesn't carry the you "F'ed up on you relationship repair kit," And they stopped stocking the "trust patch" at least a year ago. So I find myself without a way to "fix" things when she aces me for a corrected course of action.
I'll make it, however things turn out.. It's just strange not knowing how they'll go now. Until yesterday I had never thought about been gone.. being the better option.

Yesterday, everything changed...

Anyone want a Kidney?

2005-03-09T06:50:00.000-08:00

Tires suck...
While on her way to work yesterday morning C__ in her wonderful driving splendor was able to once again pick up a nail in her front tire. This sucks for a few reasons

First,
My darling wiffie seems to land more random items in her tires than there are tapes of Paris Hilton. One time she was able to run over and puncture her tire with a pair of pliers... How she did it I will never know, so she had the spare on, managed to put a nail in that and shred it on the free way.. just to name the last few.

Second,
The tire I knew wouldn't be able to be patched not only because of the nail location but also the thing had and impression of where treed used to go but was no longer there..

So that meant two new fronts and a new spare too.

F-150 tires $90.00 plus mounting, balancing, valve stems, balh, blah, blah.
So I was looking at a bill of at least 113.00 a tire or so.

So I call and make sure they have the one I need in stock, of course not, but the guy says he'll be getting in a shipment of 4 later that day I say ok and make a 3 o' clock appointment to have them put on.

Of course when I get there what do they tell me but.. O' sorry we don't have those ones sorry there was a miscommunication. So I took the situation for all I could.. First I acted upset, then confused, then bam it happened he said those magic words. "What can we do to fix this Sr.? Wait I have an idea."
He does some computer mojo jo jo and then out of nowhere I'm getting all five tires for $346.00 out the door. That's right I got 5 ($450.00 worth) tires instead of three. The guy bought my old tires off of me and then comped me all the installation cr@p. So that was a vary positive part of the day for my standpoint. The not so positive part was the fact that it took almost two hours to get the new ones put on, and I had an appointment already.

Now that money that we didn't have already.. yeah we have even less of it now, and we still had a $400+ check due to C__'s school in like a month and a half. So if anyone out there wants a Kidney.. I got two, and am pretty sure I only need one to keep going.

C__'s Schooling,
Just to lay it out there C__'s 21 and just started going back to school this year. She played the "burned out" card after high school ended.
She's going back for her Bachelors in Business Management.
So she has at least 3 years left to go, back in high school she was in all the honors or accelerated classes. So she can and will test out of quite a few credits worth of those lower classes that most have to take their first two years present company included.
She has class on Tuesdays and meets with a group once a week for about three hours of so to discuses home work and other stuff usually at Applebee's... humm that doesn't sound to me like a place to conduct a learning session, but the beers cheep so I wont complain..

Well all it's time to get back to "work" so I'll see ya tomorrow.

Must be a Monday

2005-03-07T06:51:00.000-08:00

Not for me but man you can tell it in everyone around me..

This weekend..
Friday,
As we all know I have Fridays off, so the majority of it is spent sleeping or just wasting time. But for some reason I got any itch to get some work done around the house.. So I went to the store and rented a Rug shampooed, we/ I hadn't cleaned it since the holiday season when all the family was over, sure I vacuumed, I do that just about every other day or so but I hadn't shampooed it in about three months. I looks way better, like brand new carpet again. And for the low low price of 38.00 total that aunt bad.

Friday in the PM..
We went to Native New Yorker.. It's a sports bar and grill not to big but brand new and right down the street.. Here's the best part about it. Wings the best wings I have ever or will ever have come out of that place. It wasn't just C__ and me though. We had the J__ and M__ come their our neighbor right next door and also another couple we hang around with from our block R__ and S__. That fact that so many of the people around us are in the same age range without kids is quite nice. So anyway we headed there about eight S__ came with us since R__ was working late on some network cabling problem where he works. We were meeting J__ and M__ there, since they went to a baseball game earlier. We got out table out on the patio, the night was cool but not cold, that and the restaurant had those propane heaters, our server was horrible she said "I'll be right back for your drink order"..... About twenty minutes later she works her way back over and takes the order fifteen minutes after that we get our first drink, and maybe twenty minutes later we get our dozen wings. Well that's enough of that we poke our heads into the bar side and there's an open table. Screw this we all head inside for a better seat and server.
We didn't roll out of there until about 1 am and with a table a little over 130.00 bucks for the six of us well that's not bad in my book. Considering we had a round of Yeager (or two) and about seven (or eight) pitchers of beer between all of us and food.

Saturday
I never fails that when a go out and during it up.. the next day my body likes to rub it in and will wake me up no later than ummm... say seven o' clock in the mourning. So I pulled my ace out of bed and headed over to the store to return the shapooer, since they'll charge you for another full day if you're late I figured I might as well be early for sure.

Back to Native?
Yep day number two of Native was hangover food instead of hang out food. Some more wings a salad, and a few other wonderful treats that are perfect for eating in bed or on the couch, we watched cr@ppy movies and sat around for almost the entire day.
I think the only redeeming thing we did all day was I started a load of laundry C__ did a little school work.. because she's all studious now, it's great. Then we work out to relive some of the high toxin levels in our bodies and it was time to turn in for the night.

Sunday...
Business as usual I went to work and C__ hung out with her mom at the house..
Something new,
C__ got her mom to play PS2 yesterday, Virtual fighter 4. I think she's addicted to it now she played it for like four hours with C__ and then another hour or so with me. She even whooped me a few times. I was fun though.

All things considered I would have to say I had one of the best weekends I've had in a long time.

Plans for a Monday?
Yep, make it to Tuesday.

Current Craziness

2005-03-03T17:20:00.000-08:00

Author: D-RantMaster

New and exciting in the life of me..

More funny for my money.
So I went to get a small home equity loan yesterday, just get rid if all those little bill with big interest rates and take care of a few other little things we just can't seem to get paid for lately.
I figured it shouldn't be to much of a problem, since out house is selling for about 60k more than we bought it for and I only wanted a few grand to take care of everything.
Bzzzz wrong.. Apparently I don't have all it takes to get a home equity loan.. I have a home, it has equity.. what's the problem.

But on the other hand they will give me a signature loan that's a bit smaller at a bit higher interest rate.. This I don't get at all, see if they're willing to just give me a loan because I say I'm going to pay it back rather that giving me one where I front my house for the funds, how is that safer from a lending stand point?

Grandma Bread the aftermath
Grandma bread day was great, even though I didn't learn directly from her, it was an honor all the same.. We started at about noon and didn't finish until about 5 that evening. We made three loafs of bread, a pan of dinner rolls and a pan of "sweet rolls" (cinnamon rolls). All by hand no mixers no kitchen aids, nothing but a whisk and a wooden spoon. It was just as I remembered all full of that fresh bread smell, best still warm with just a little strawberry jam.
It was really a good day.

Another roommate?
Anyone who reads this knows that recently we had C__'s mom move in with us for a bit while she gets sht straightened out in her life. But it get better, at the moment I feel like the days of our life's them should be going in the background of my life.

See if you can fallow this..
C__ mom's ex husband, not C__'s "real" dad will be coming to stay for a few day/ weeks who knows because he was kicked out of his current living situation with this other lady he was living with. Any way he was living there for a place to put his horses and fix into a property to sell, she wanted more, he didn't, she kicked him out on the spot.

So now it's going to be C__, her mom, her ex- step dad, and myself, for a bit..
It's not like we don't have the room for one more person to come into the house, or anything there's still ample room in the downstairs office.. I guess, from what I hear he should only be living with us for about a week, if it happens.

FW:

2005-02-28T09:51:00.000-08:00

> So I'm testing the E-post thing right now.. If all goes well I'll be able to get back into the swing of things

Lasting Legacy

2005-02-24T16:15:00.000-08:00

Grandma Bread
It originates from a recipe of potato bread that my grandma started making back when dirt was new, the depression was in full effect, or milk was to hard to come by.. It's a dieing art form to carry forward what was done in the past. From what I understand there are only two people left who know how to make the bread we affectionately call "grandma bread." It got it's title over the course of time due to the fact that grandma was the only one who could make it, or at least make it taste the way she did. That and even if she hadn't made any in a week or two her home smelt of it constantly.
It had been so long since she had made the bread off of a piece of paper that, she only knew it through feel taste and time. So before passing away the art was passed to two of her daughters.. Neither of which were my mom. She can't make toast without some how messing up, but she tries. No, my aunt is in town helping my mom with her broken leg, so I will take this time to learn all I can about how to make this bread since they're all getting older.
I think in my own off way that's why I started making bread in the first place. It's a way to connect with someone who is no longer there to share time with you, but their gift weather it be of knowledge or the taste of a old bread recipe will always be with you, as long as you let it.

I know what your thinking, "what the hail is potato bread?"
Instead of using milk for your liquids you take a potato and boil it in water for the starch and earthy taste. Past that I have know idea as of yet how it differs from the current recipes I use.

It's not so much that the challenge is making the bread.. It's that there's a story behind it, there's a standard to go with it, and no one ever thinks they can make "real grandma bread."
So I'm going to make it after work today. It being my Friday thou I'll try to get to a computer some where and let anyone who care's to know if it all worked out or not.

In other news.. this whole thing with C__ and me I feel has reached it's maximum amount of sucky, hopeful things start going back to a good place for us soon.. Less yelling more lovin ya know what I mean.

C__'s mom AKA mom in-law is still living with us, I just tell myself one day at a time. C__ talked to her yesterday about pitching in for some bills and stuff we all use and she said it seemed like she got mad. What because C__ lived in her home since birth she now owes her mom free living. uumm no that's not how it goes, not until she's old and crazy... crazier.

Beep ba beep beep beep... news flash

So while gone to the other location I had to got to today I left my water and a package of peanut butter crackers on the other desk.. When I get back to the desk.. water's there.. where's my crackers!
That's right they're gone, the guy who was here in the middle there gave them away! He said he didn't think they were anyone's and some guy was complaining of being hungry or something.. but still they were mine, so now I'm goanna get all whinny and mad... but not, because it's a little funny at the same time.
See while at work eat about ever two hours so I figured I could just leave them here, but I guess not
Author: DRantMaster
Ok that's done..

Damm that's funny I just had a lady try to sneak Girl Scout Cookies out past me.... No really Girl Scout Cookies, doesn't that brake some kind of Girl Scout pledge to be sneaky? What was I goanna do? Take em away from her? Tell that she was taking cookies out of the building without a valid property pass? Beat her up until she told me where she got them? Honestly people, you already bought the things, someone brought them in through some entrance and now you just trying to get the Thin Mints and Peanut Butter Cookies home. I don't care... just go. It's not a really big deal unless Thin Mints have started coming with cameras in them like everything else in the freaken world.

On a side note thanks to all of you who actually came and left a comment. I know the posting is few and far between for me lately, but it feels good that you guy still come to see if anything's new.

Shhh I'm here again

2005-02-24T15:59:00.000-08:00

So I made it onto the blogg.. day two. I wrote a bunch earlier today, but somebody (P-Riddy) is a slacker and hasn’t posted it yet.

I went and picked up my dad from the surgeon this afternoon. All's well so far, he had his rotator cuff worked on for a few hours.
They went in and scraped stuff and filled stuff, then stitched it all back up again. He's doing good, walking around and feeling really good. Perkaset will do that for just about anyone I think. That's really all that new since I finished my post. I'll call P-Riddy and make him put it up.

Have a great weekend everyone.. I'll see ya'll on Sunday.

Howdy!

2005-02-22T14:20:00.000-08:00

It’s me.
I'm alive. Still..
It's been awhile since I was able to see the good old blogger home page. I'm not even sure if anyone makes it to this thing any more.
I haven't heard any more on the whole Police Department thing.. But I still have my fingers crossed. There's another tryout on the 9th of next month for a different department, so I suppose I'll go to that too.

Now onto bigger things..
C__ and I are hitting some tuff times right now. It feels different between us right now. I don't know how to explain it..

I'll just lay out the scenario and see what you think about it.

Friday was deemed "Guy's Night" all of us old friends got together, berried a few old problems and went to a Sting game (Lacrosse). I had never gone to a Lacrosse game in my life. It was different.. vary different. it was like basketball rules unless you were the poor fool with the ball. Then you were a dead man. All gloves came off helmets too.
Our tickets where won in a silent auction for $50 we showed up and they let us up to our seat. Up I say because they were in a suite.. Now that was two new things, a lacrosse game and we got to watch it with free food and beer. Needles to say, I had a "few beers" and some food our team won in sudden death by one point.
We went back to P-Riddys where I proceeded to get even more drunk.. Not drink more but just get more drunk. At that moment I had the grand idea.. "Everyone has a post while drunk, I gotta do it." Stumbled my way upstairs to the computer barley squeaked out the post I was able to get up and then C__ called. She said are you drunk, I said a little, she said are you coming home? I said, yeah but we're still over at P-Riddys. She got a little mad saying she had something planned for us and wanted me home soon. I said, well to be honest I don't remember anything we said after that but by then it was time for us to head home. So that's when gravity proved itself to me and I fell all the way down a flight of stairs landing on my back. Got up and walked over to the sink, left a little present in there and walked out to head home. Then we were at J's house, I don't remember the car ride there but I know it took about an hour to get there.. We went in, I sat down pulled out my contacts, I don't know why I thought to do that, and set myself an alarm to get me up in two hours so as to get home by 4am.

Que 7am I wake up and notice it's light cringe at the sight of it and get up. I arrive home to find C__ gone to God knows where.
But I had no idea she had planned something vary special for the night before.. the night I didn't come home for.
Lets just leave it at she had set out rose peddles and strung lights around the bed canopy.
Now of course I'm feeling bad enough..

Enter C__,
She understandably mad but she tells me to take my stuff and get out we're done.. and then throws all my clothes down the stairs at me. We fight for about umm the rest of the day AKA she yells at me, I sit and listen.

Would you take it that far?

Needless to say I'm not moving out, she was just really mad and still is. I can just feel it in her.

God everything’s just crazy sometimes
It felt good to post..
Se ya'll later

drunk

2005-02-18T22:57:00.000-08:00

d rtant.. is drunk.. just got off the phone with C__ see her later tomarrow. . later..

Commence waiting... now

2005-02-10T16:20:00.000-08:00

Author: D-RantMaster

It's Thursday and I haven't put up anything in almost 3 days.. It's just so freaken hard to get stuff written without using to much time in the day..

Oral board interview..
Not bad.
I expected "what if" questions from all sides but the whole thing was based on previous work history, they where all about wanting to know what I had to offer, what I didn't like about past positions, what I did like about them. I got in at 3 instead of sitting around for a half an hour. When I showed up at 3:05 and checked in, one of the ladies behind the desk said, "I just called up to tell them, the 3 o' clock didn't show. Do you want o go now?" Of course I said yes, I'll be that guy who came in early, showed initiative, and was prepared to start.
Funny thing was I felt all ready to go, then stepped into the elevator and by the second floor had turned into a freaken spaz. I stepped off and had ice hands, I hate ice hands, but it never fails to happen. The whole process wasn't bad, it was two officers (women) and one lady from HR doing the whole interview. I could have laughed when I walked in, I knew they where going to do something like that, but an all female panel I didn't see coming. I thought well that's either really good because I always look good in nice pants and a tie, or it's really bad because they don't like guys..
These are the things only I would think about..
The whole thing took about twenty five minutes, but it felt like about ten at most, I didn't feel rushed or like I was leaving anything out. I made good eye contact with each of them during each answer you know all that good stuff. But at the end when they said "do you have any questions?" I drew a big fat blank, goose egg, nadda, I had all these things I was thinking about before the end then .... was all I could think of.
O' well I did all I could, they said they'd be sending out letters of expense/ rejection in a week or so.
So I just have to sit here and think about all I said or didn't say for a whole week.. It's driving me crazy a little more every day.

C__ and I are doing ok, we need to find a common ground again, I know we're still in love and want to be with each other, but right now it just seems everything I do drivers her crazy and vice versa.

Other than that I found a bad ace pair of Nike running shoes. You can custom make your shoe colors and tread style, everything down to the laces. The pair I want is $120.00 it's a boat load for shoes, but I use them for what they're intended for.. running. I don't just want them because they cost a bunch of dough, that's dumb, it's not like I got a bunch of extra cash as it is. So I have to save up budget, but they'll be worth it.

Other than that is just the same old Sh!t sitting at work and waiting for the weekend.

Have a great weekend everbody.

Family Photos

2005-02-09T16:51:00.000-08:00

Looking through the old photo album I found this picture of my grandfather and his racing partner James Garner.

A weekend full of fun...

2005-02-07T15:07:00.000-08:00

Author: D-Rant Master

Since I know all you did all weekend was sit and wait for today so I could get back to a computer and tell you how everything went, right?

Well the written test..
2 hours 30 minutes of common sense questions on everything from kids in a mall bothering store owners to, baby's in the street. It was all video scenarios about 30 seconds to a minute in length with a A,B,C,D, sheet to mark you answer on. Then what looked like a statue on DUI that you had to fill in the blanks with one of the four words provided. Lastly a report written in twelve minutes about a video scenario of a kid that ran off with a tip jar, of course no two witnesses had the same story to tell so you had to be quick and get all side while they where talking. I felt like I was back in high school again. That and when I showed up, it seemed everyone around me had this same look on their face.
Think.. dentists office waiting room and in the back theirs a drill sound and a guy screaming for his mom.. That's how it felt, waiting with these people. I guess by that time I had a different approach on the whole thing, I had done as much as I could to carry my self this far (turn in my application on time).

After the test they said, "it's goanna be about an hour and a half before we post the results." Now you all remember the second fantastic thing on my list of things to do that day right? I had a 7:30 George Strait concert to get to.. it was 7 and the results wouldn't be posted until 8:30.. no good. So I swallowed my anxiety and headed to the show. I figured well if I'm not goanna make it I really don't want it to rune the whole "George experience." I got there just in time to get in get two $7.00 ($14.00!) Coors lights and get to my seat. C__ her mom, and "the date" where already there. I guess there's a pre pre opener that I missed but I got there in time for Dierks Bentley to come on thou. He did a good job of getting the crowd going and on their feet, but I guess that what he's there for. He sung a few old songs and a few new ones. Then there was a quick five minutes in between him and George, so it was back up for another two beers, pretzel and nachos, $28.00. Sure it was a little pricey but that part of the whole thing isn't it getting the cr@p beat out of you finically just to stay alive through a good time.

George did great too, he sung about... maybe sixteen songs before heading off the stage, at which point the entire stadium shook with the sound of fans going wild and wanting just a little more.. Then on they came back to the stage once more and once more around the arena went ape sh!t. He sung four more and then it was done.. The first concert I had ever been to, was a great one. O and the seats we're amazing. Prior to getting there I was told they where bad seats and we were goanna get shafted on the whole thing. But they had set up a Mic on each side of the stage which meant that now when the band was facing our way.. we were in the eight row off the floor (about 20 yards at most).

Then reality set in when we left. I had to go and see what the next day held for me and how I did on the test. I took a little over forty minutes to get to the library to see my results, O' and it's about 12:45 in the mourning right now. I walk up and have one of those movie moment where the main actor is so scared they can't even look to see what the sheet might say....
I find my name and in bold letters on the right side of the page.. pass. That right I passed and was onto the next step. O' cr@p the next step starts at 7 am tommar.. this mourning. It was time to hurry home and get to bed, we rolled in at about 1 am and I fell asleep about 1:30 am. Buuuzzzz the alarm sounds at 5:45 am, I feel ok, not my best but ok. Get up and get ready have about three glasses of water and about two bites of food before feeling ill (food before test, apparently not a good idea).

I wasn't the best guy out there.. but I was damm good.
Pushup's: 52
Sit-ups: 57
Wall jump and sprint: 7.45 seconds
1.5 mile Run: 9.50 (second place)

I skipped the reception thing later that day but C__ went anyway and was back home later in the evening. I have a Oral Board interview on Monday the 7th at 3:30.

My friends here's to the next step.

GMAIL

2005-02-04T08:31:00.000-08:00

I have like 50 GMail invites so speak up if you want one!!

Tomorrow's the day..

2005-02-03T08:32:00.000-08:00

Author: DRantMaster

So tomorrow's the test day.. wish me luck.

This weekend has some real potential to be great.

Friday...

Item number one:
Written test. While the almost two and a half hour test doesn't look to be to thrilling by itself it does however have the potential to start new and great things in my path of existence.
It starts at 4:00 pm and will last until about 6:30 pm then they score and tell you the results of the test. I think this will be the longest wait in my life. Not that it will brake me if I can't make it on the first go.. but I don't handle failing well, and I would view this largely as a failure on my part. Since they stressed the fact that you wouldn't need to study in any way to take the written portion of the test.

Fingers crossed.. Check. Praying to God for a calm before the test.. Check.

Item number two:
Same night George Strait concert.
First concert of my life.. ever. That's right I've never gone and this is my first one. Plus I'm going to have to show up late. It starts at seven, I probably wont get there until eight. But that's ok I don't mind that to much, I'll just miss the opening act and maybe a little of the show right.

Saturday..

Item number one:
God willing I'll be testing for the physical portion of the PD that day. I know what you're thinking D Rant you can't go to a concert and then be to a physical test at 7 am the next day.
I don't plan on gettin' blasted the day before, or staying out to late the night after the test, red bull will give me wings and at least five hours of sleep will tide me over on the rest portion of the whole thing. So the way I look at it is if I can get home before 2 I'll be in good shape. That and if I make it past the written part I'll be so up I won't be able to sleep anyway.

Current stats:

Push-ups: 50+ before I die.

Sit-ups: about 100 before exhaustion.

6 ft wall then 25 yards sprint: 6 seconds or better.

1.5 miles: 9.43 minutes best time so far.

Item number two:
Not sure what this will be.. But if all went well on the rest of the journey, it will involve drinking until the wee hours of the mourning.

Then of course it's back to work on Sunday, same as always. I got asked to work an extra four on this Sunday.. I said ok so I'll be pulling a 12 hour day that day.. Huumm that's not sounding so good the more I think about it. I think I might have to talk to boss man again and back out of plan A.

Mom in-law is all moved out of her old place. Not all the way into our place yet, still some boxes and stuff to be done but nothing to major any more. I still have to crawl into the attic at our place to run in the cable line, and hang a blind in the other room AKA her office.

We watched The Grudge last night.
I won't bother you with a long winded analogy.. Just a couple of short thoughts.
Good movie, at least I thought it was. It had a few well place suspense building parts with a few pieces were C__ had to say, "Hold on to me. Or O' God I can look I can't look." The only thing I didn't get was the noise that thing made.. Why and where did it come from?
Then we watched "Secret Window" with Johnny Depp in it (C__'s movie boyfriend). It was a pretty good one too as far as the story went. I'm always a sucker for the criminally insane bit.

Yesterday I slept in, and go to work an hour and a half late, O' well I had worked twelve the day before. So I'll still walk away with overtime for the week. It's strand when you wake up late for work, it's always the feeling of O' God hurry up and get out the door. But I really didn't have this feeling this time. It was more like, hum I'm already late.. So I got ready a little slower and drove a little less erratic, I was kinda nice coming into work at 7:30 instead of 6:00, of course then I had to hear sh!t from everyone all day, but hey what can you do right?

Ok this is long enough for most people to stop.. I guess I'll drop a line Sunday sometime.

Big Post Lots To Say

2005-02-01T22:50:00.000-08:00

Posted By: P-Riddy
Author: D-RantMaster

What I do now.. I do for the good of the family..

Ok .. I think it's goanna happen, C__'s mom is going to have to move in for a little while. She called last night and talked to C__ for about a half and hour. Apparently her apartment doesn't plan to remove the mold now taking over one of her living room walls, nor the sheet rock that seems to be sagging off the wall/ ceiling in the hallway.

Not that I really want her to move all her stuff in but I can let someone live like that, if it was you.. I probably let you come live with me for a while too. So she's going to move in what she "needs" and put the rest in a storage facility. She's talking about as soon as the first of the month.

Now than on to other news.
I now spend the better part of eight hours a day.. thinking about somewhere else. Anything else really. I go read news releases in the intranet but after about five minutes of reading those are about as entertaining as bamboo skewers under your fingernails. Who care is our radio system made it to outer space.. again. It happens all the time, we've been the leader in space communications for about fifty years. Gimmie something new and exiting to read about.

I actually sat down and watched the State of the Business on the computer for an hour and a half. How does it even pertain to me anyway. I have nothing to do with the revenue the company makes. They've made that fact over abundantly clear that all we as a department are is an expense. The only good part to the whole thing was that we got to watch something for an hour or so before it was time to go home for the day. That and they gave you the option to ask a question at the end if you wanted.
All I could think of is asking one of those high schools like questions.. you know the ones, how do you plan to improve the food in the cafeteria, when do we have student teacher switch day.. where to CEO's step down and trade places with the "common folk." But no, I didn't submit one, I just let all the brains in the company ask a bunch of questions that just got answered by the old guy ten minutes ago. Then it was time to go home...

last night while trying to take care of my truck.. with what little I can do, I was taking out the spark plugs to clean them and check them for ware. Yep I broke one... sweet. So what to do when you brake a plug and have to go get another one..

That's right go with the neighbor off roading in his truck through the desert to find boulders for a fire pit.
So I did.
I was crazy fun, especially since the only time I've ever been of road in a truck is to pull onto a graded lot for construction. So we went romping back into the badland of the San tan mountains.. State property blah blah blah, we needed rocks.. free rocks. And where do you go to find the best rocks? That's right, the top of a mountain. So we did. Got out flipped the hubs on the front (it's an older Ford) and let of the break and on the gas, over a cactus or two and we were there in no time. We loaded up about a dozen boulders most about two basketballs in size, then it was time to get down of the mini mountain we had scaled. R__ went to turn around the truck and wouldn't you know it.. the 4x4 stop working right, so 4x2 it was, and over a teddy bear cactus and a few decent sized boulders we went to get back on the trail for home. All and all, I would say it was a pretty good distraction from the fact that I didn't know how I was going to afford or get to the new plugs I needed for my little truck back home. Yeah that's because pay day.. it's on Friday and yesterday.. that was only Wednesday last time I looked.
Finagle a little bit of the savings and off we went to the auto parts store in the middle of our little town. I got to the store on asked for the plugs, the guy looks at me and says, they're $7.99, and I was thought great only 8 bucks for four plugs, then he said, "each." Bum bum bummmm, so my cheep fix just got a little more expensive. But this was the kicker, (yeah I said kicker what are ya goanna do about it) They came to $34.64 how much did I have in the account.. $34.34. So it's back on the phone and transferring more cash to cover the bill. Got the plugs and headed home.
To put an end to this whole thing I got the new ones in after getting the right adapter from the old guy down the street with everything, and this mourning my truck was running awesome. The way it used to go my RPM's would sit at about 3500 when I would do 75mph not they only go to 3000 or less, so that's way better on the gas front too. Sweet.

Nico sorry you haven't found "that guy" I pride myself on being "that guy." Keep looking, he's out there. But no there's nothing wrong with takken care of business when there's work to be done.. if you fallow me.

Julia,
You take a simple egg bread recipe and add about a half a cup of Jalapenos and about two cups of cubed cheese that all depending on how cheesy you like your bread, I use Colby Jack. Find something with a low oil (not like Cheddar). Add the jalapenos while mixing the starter, then kneed in the cheese cubes before letting it rest. I usually let it rest for an hour in the bowl and an hour in the pan. And I use two packets of yeast instead of one, you get more rise that way.

That's right I can go all Wolfgang Puck on your ace..

A.D.D. Rears it's ugly head...

2005-01-26T15:54:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a better day..
I was over at the other building all day.. This meant no boss man, or boss mans' boss.
I spent he better part of the day listing to Willie Nelson and John Mayer. See while in the receiving shack you can listen to music. At this point there's really nothing else I can do, I stand a little, sit a little, walk around in my ten by ten cell. I read and re read all my e-mails, so on that note if you have my e-mail, for the love of god drop a line. I running out of sanity, fast. But I must say John Mayer's new CD is pretty good. Not my usual taste in music but still vary good. It's allot of laid back tracks where if you just have to pass the time as I do so often it'll do it. I actually use "daughters" from that CD to make a DVD for C__ at Christmas time. It's a good song with allot of meaning if you're someone who got left behind as a child. If you're looking for something laid back, check it out..

What else?
I made some Jalapeno Cheese bread worth killing for on Sunday. Made a sandwich out of it yesterday. mmmm good sandwich

Well I had the best run yet last night. I.5 miles in 10.01 minutes.. But all I could think of was, "damm if I would have went faster back there it would have been under 9." Leave it to me to see up side to the whole thing right.

Well there's only nine days left until the test and I feel the closer I get the more unready I am. This is normal though, right? Well it's normal for me, before any big test or interview I always fall into a million peaces, and worry non stop, that way by the time I get to the thing I'm worried about, it's all worn off and I breeze through he whole thing. But this time it's different, the whole process takes about a month to do all the background checks and poly test, physiological evaluations and what not, so that's like a whole month and a half of constant gut wrenching stress.

God when this is all over, if and when I make it in. I'm taking a week off and finding the nearest bar.. then moving in.

O' I almost forgot the biggest and best news, "Native New Yorker" moved in a short seven miles down the road. That's right. To all of you who don't' know. Native New Yorker is a sports bar here in AZ, and they serve some of the best wings I've ever eaten, along with having like ten TV's going at all times with everything from football to moto cross. Beer's not to bad either, $2.50 a pint. C__ and I stopped in and got a couple pints with a basket of curly fries. We always watch the trivia game, never buy in to play, but we watch it, it's fun.

Well I've kind of lost focus of where I was going with all this, so I'll see ya'll later. O' and just so you know I'm reading still, even though I don't have the ability/time to leave a comment..

and a special thanks to J-mo,Vortexia, and Nico for making the rounds.. so I don't feel all lonely

Good Times

2005-01-25T16:32:00.000-08:00

I feel the only way to make you understand my day yesterday is to play it out..

4:40am...
Wake-up ten minutes late, throw off whole day. Shower, brush teeth, fiddle with contacts for five minutes. Throw together winning lunch made up of, banana peanuts, and popcorn (Mmm like being on vacation.. in Ethiopia).

5:04am...
Run to car, time to drive to work. Drive, drive, drive. Get stuck behind the only person in Arizona that thinks 50 mph is way to fast to go this early in the mourning.

Slow multiple time on freeway, for what I still have no clue.

5:56am...
Get to work walk in.. Get informed that we had someone call and say they aren't coming in. This means we have four people total on shift. We need five to function. Swindle someone from nights to stay extra four hours.

9:00am ish...
Get pushed out of my spot out to a receiving shack.

9:50am
Get call form boss man..

Boss man: Night shift guy has to go home by ten, I'm goanna come over and relieve you. You walk over to your truck and get it, then over to over to night shift guy.

Me: Ok...

9:56am...
Boss man arrives.

Me: Since it's like five minutes until night shift guy has to go. Should I just take the patrol truck instead?

Boss Man: Yes.

Get in truck and get to night shift guy with two minutes to spare.

10:00am
I'm not at a guard shack at the other building from where I started my day. I get a phone call from Boss mans' boss

Boss mans' boss: You're not that bright, are you?

(No hello or good mourning, gotta love when you know you're at the bottom of the food chain)

Me: What?

Boss mans' boss: What good does the truck do over there?

Me: ...

Boss mans' boss: You where told to take your truck to the guard shack.

Me: ..., Boss man told me to take the truck and relieve night shift guy, so I did.

Boss mans' boss: Well how are we supposed to get the truck back now?

Me: During rotation when I go to the other front desk.. I'll get it then.

Boss mans' boss: That doesn't help us now..

Me: Sorry.

Whatever, sit there doing nothing for the next.. o' I'd say hour..

11:00am ish...
Time to rotate to front of building. Go get truck drop off keys, and get dirty look from boss mans' boss.

Pretty much nothing from then until..
1:00pm ish...
P-Riddy calls, so I call him back we talk, blah blah blah..

1:09pm...
Phone rings its boss man..

Boss man: Was it important?

Me: What?

Boss man: The phone call. Was it important? You were on the phone for ten minutes.

Me: (Time for a educated response) No it was like eight minutes.. there's a timer on the phone.

Boss man: Boss mans boss and I went back and looked at the tape... you were on the phone for at least ten minutes..

Me: ... fine.

queue the need to use the rest room now.. no release for another 50 minutes.

Realize that we were short staffed today and boss man and boss mans' boss had the time to sit back and "review" tapes to see how long I was on the phone for.

Stew in my own anger for rest of day and serve cold..

End one fantastic day..

Go home sleep by about nine thirty. no work out.. no dinner.. just bed.

In other news there's a warring out starting today not to drink any tap water without boiling it first..
For the whole city of Phoenix..
These wacky modern time we live in.

P.D. Test date Feb 4th failure not an option..

Trimming the "fat"

2005-01-20T22:12:00.000-08:00

Well I suppose you could call it that.
They're slashing out employees like a day after thanksgiving sale at JC Penny's. Two not one but two walked out yesterday never to return..
We only knew about one at the end of yesterday, but this mourning we and by we mean the remaining six came into quite a surprise. Another one of our weekend workers had fallen victim to the HR gods.
So now we're short staffed and stretched thin..
This means no brakes.. just straight eights and of to home.
I'm kinda glad it's all happening like this, ya it's horrible for the other guys who did get to come back to work today, but by the same token it just pushes me a little more toward trying even harder for the PD.

I had my "informative seminar" last night. It was good, they weren't there to talk it all up or make it seem like it's a Cop Rock or something. There was a background investigator that ran most of the presentation, she was vary nice and quite helpful for most the info we were looking to gather from the whole thing.
Also two of the long term 30+ year officers were there to answer any questions about the job itself. There were a few people, maybe 10% that looked to be in good physical condition. Overall thou I don't think the people who showed up for the meeting last night where ready to go and try out. I heard a few saying how now they're going to have to start working out now.. like they weren't before. See I know cop's in general have that big doughnut eating gut having persona. But really that's not how you can be when first trying out or qualifying for the academy. They say the average for the run is 11 to 12 minutes.. I have 10.30 solid so far. That's really the only thing I'm worried about. push-ups and sit-ups are never hard.
As far as the written portion of the test that I really have now way to prepare for.
It's 54 video scenarios where you select the right answer.
A few paragraphs to read where you insert the right word..
And one short report on a ten minute video.
Nothing really mind burring. I think that's why I focus on the physical side more. It's something I can control.

O by the way it's on the 4th of next month and the apps are due no later than this Friday at 4pm.

So here we go I guess. I know I can do it and it's giving me something to work for that I never thought possible.
So for the next two weeks, I'm pulling "two a days" like back in the day to get my stamina way up. I'll get my 1.5 miles in under ten if kills me.

What else?
Well I told the head of security my plan.. he seemed more excited for me than my folks were (they finally got on board with the whole thing). I never leave my previous boss hanging, I just think it bad business. Even when I got laid off from the school district I still called to see if they found everything the first day I wasn't there.

So away, I go to fill out my life's history on the application.. It's weird, they don't want a resume attached.

Limbo

2005-01-18T11:46:00.000-08:00

Posted by: P-Riddy
Author: D-Rantmaster

Everything's in limbo right now.
I'm going to a informational seminar tonight for the Police Department. I think it's really going to be a good thing. Yeah I might not make it in in the first run through, but I can't think about it like that. I'm not exactly sure what will be covered tonight or how it's all going to go.. I mean are we all going to sit down and listen to a dozen different people ramble on about benefits and all that stuff you have to hear on your New hire orientation, or is it going to be people talking about their experiences in the department.. will there be an open forum for questions.. should I ask questions.. I want to seem visible without being overbearing.. God it feels like I'm interviewing already.

What else is new and exciting in the life and time of D Rant..
Well C__ is talking about going back to schools again. This is always a difficult thing for us.
C__ always thinks that going back and getting a degree is going to somehow hinder what we are doing in our lives at the current moment. She refuses to apply for student loans saying, she wont be responsible for any more debt. But how does she expect to move forward in life and with her dreams if she isn't willing to take a risk and a few student loans to make things happen.

Just incase you didn't already know,
C__ want to go to Scottsdale Culinary Institute. It's all hoity toytie and accredited. But it cost about the same as what I paid for my degree.. ok maybe a little more. But C__ really wants to do something with her degree. Not just shelve it and find some two bit job. She's a wonderful cook and business woman. She want to open her own place and do catered events. things like that. I'm all for her doing that as long as she really finds joy in it.

Pop
C__ just called me..
Her tire just blew out on the freeway. She's ok she was on her way up to my "father in-laws" work to do their books, C__ also does book keeping she quite good at it too. Apparently she lied to her real job saying she just didn't feel good and had to go home early, karma I tell you, it's all karma. But that was her spare that blew, her real tire was already flat and needed to be replaced. That and there was no tread left on the front tires already, so now we have to get the front two tires and the spare.. that three tire's. They're like 90 buck each. We have a little money right now but god we just dropped 230 on the freaken' dogs like two weeks ago.
If anyone knows of a good corner where I can make some money fast.. or possibly sell some of my liver.. or a kidney. I would really appreciate it.

The voice calls down from above.. on Mount Olympus,
HR called someone in today.. he's on the way there right now.. Everyone's kinda feaking out, we all use the internet and sometimes "things" come up without warring or caution.. hopefully this doesn't spread over the whole department here. But from what I hear in the rumor mill, there are quite a few issues (AKA people) to be "dealt with."
I'm more your common worrier, I sit and ring my hands crack my knuckles, think of ten thousand different ways things can play out. So now I sit here waiting to see if I am one of the next to be called to face the call to dreaded H1133.

Change focus.. get mind off of HR,
Workout night tonight, when I get off work,
1.5 miles 10.32 minutes only 1.32 to knock off and I'll feel ready with my run time. Go speed racer go!

REMOVE THAT IMAGE

2005-01-13T15:53:00.000-08:00

WHAT THE HELL SMART ASS!! WHY THE GRAPHIC CONTENT!!

Your site now has to be removed from by blog and I can't go to your blog anymore. This really angers me because I love your site, and I enjoy said content as much as the next man, but now I can't risk reading your site because of crappy content like that.

I love your site and rely on it to get me through the day at work, but now I can't go there and I have to be concerned that someone in IT see's that I went to your site!!! THAT KIND OF SHIT CAN GET PEOPLE FIRED!!! YOU OWE US AN APOLOGY!! If you take the image down we'll talk about adding your site back on to our list.

When I grow up...

2005-01-13T13:31:00.000-08:00

Published By: P-Riddy
Author: D-Rant Master

Time for the "next step."

Up until now.. I've always had "jobs." I think this is my downfall as far as my completed self is concerned.
I don't need a job anymore, I need something I'm goanna and want to devote my time and brain to. So let me run this by you, then you can call me crazy and laugh all you want.
I for some reason feel that I'm not "doing my part" but by the same token I don't feel the need to fly over seas to get my ace shot off in the middle of some desert.
So why not do it here?
That's right folks D Rant in his infinite wisdom and mild insanity would like to try out to become a officer of the law. Stranger things have happened.. I think.
I have a information seminar to attend on the 18th of this month, to find out all thin info on the tryouts and testing possess.

I realize that it's not all lethal weapon or C.S.I. when you become a police officer. But I can still see the benefits of it all.

(Musical intermission.....)
That was Whiskey River by Willie Nelson.

Reactions have been mixed. Most were good, due to the fact that I finally decided to finally get out and go after something. Here's the breakdown

P-Riddy:
Perfect response for a best friend to give. He said, "Yeah I've always though of you doing something like that."

C__:
Totally backs me the whole way. Plus due to the high divorce rate among the ranks of police officers.. I've made her swear not to leave me. (Not that it was a serious worry)

Sis and Brother in-law:
Overall one of the most receptive and positive responses I received was from the two of them.

Dad:
Not so good.. He responded with a, "Well I don't think it's such a good idea."

This is to be expected from my parents thou.

Example one:
My 27 year old sister says, "Brother in-law and I are gong to have a baby!"
Parents respond with, "You're a little to young don't you think?"

Example two:
We say, "We're getting married."
Mom pull now wife aside from me to say, "Do you think that's the best idea, this really isn't the right path."

yep full on support from the parents every time, that's what you can't expect.

Until of course you're succeeding at sed item, then it's all smiles and good times.

O and I didn't even tell mom's about what the plan is.. I didn't want to hear how I was goanna get shot right at the moment.

That was the big weekend.

Aside from that
This weekend when I drove to my sisters.. C__ didn't come with, for all you who don't know this is extremely rear, maybe three time since we've been together have C__ and I done thing that the other didn't. That's in like six years time mind you. But it was ok.. just kindda felt like I was missing the other shoe all afternoon.

Hopefully this get up on the blog soon

I believe there's a song out there that goes something like..

2005-01-13T08:10:00.000-08:00

Published By: P-Riddy
Author: D-Rant Master
"We gotta get out of this place If it's the last thing we ever do We gotta get out of this place Girl, there's a better life for me and you."

Well folks that's how I'm feeling while I sit here and ponder about the day.
I think a better thing to have said is,
How did we get inta this place?
What chain of event brought me to my current place in life. Did it all go back to when I was but a small child in the tinny town in Minnesota. Did fate twist is gnarled thumb down at me as top say no.. no you I'm afraid will be just like everyone else you've ever known. Living life not for yourself but for a payment on a house or car. A big TV and a few little pieces of jewelry.
It's strange the way things in life turn out. I've known people who made millions upon millions of dollars.. I've also know the ones who lost it all to a few bad turns in business and a crash and burn marriage.

I've never really hung it out there, and out it all on the line before. I think that's what I'm doing with trying to go for the whole PD thing. I sick of being that guy who work his 40 every week and goes home to eat and sleep only to maybe.. if there's enough money left in the budget, god willing. Go out and have a dinner or spend a little time with friends. Not that by any stroke of the imagination I'm upset about having to budget money, I've been doing that since about thirteen when I wanted to save lunch money to buy video games. I just would like to know that when done working with the dang thing, I'm not going to say, "Well good we just made it be ten bucks.. again." I want a life where I save for things like cruses and trips out of town for the weekend. Not the kind of life were you ask yourself if this week is the week you can go and get a haircut or if that will "put you over."
That's not a life.. it's something much worse.

Not to mention the fear I currently have of failure. I can't fail. If I go out for this and don't make the cut. I'm not sure how I'll take it.
I've always.. always made the cut.
Since the time I can to AZ and "started over" with my life I've only ever done better than ever before. Never looking back or falling to the side. I came here and tested up in my classes. I took my life into my own hands and lost the weight that would have unavoidably killed me by now. I moved up faster than any other person while working for the schools system. I started as a parts runner for my father in-laws concrete company and by the time I left I was doing everything there was to do including bidding and running jobs. Getting my degree was cake, sure is was in animation witch now might as well be basket weaving but it was something I mastered with no stroke of true effort on my part.
But then I got this kick to the stomach where. My new found passion of art and animation meant nothing. The job market was dry. The hard but fulfilling place in concrete had become to unstable to stay at and was no longer where I could stay. I settled for this place in security.. with security, where as long as you fulfill the six major tasks of the day two of which are showing up and staying awake you have a place to come to the fallowing day. But it doesn't fill me with joy to come in everyday and sit in front of this place.. in front of this screen and watch my life go by whilst I sit breathing and forgetting what it is to be alive. So I will change my path and set a new course.. I will achieve all I set forth to do once again. I will grab that twisted thumb of fate and brake it so as to say, "you don't get it do you. I'm not goanna take this crap any more. I won't be that guy anymore.. I'm goanna be me."

Tryout requirements for PD

To date...
Time for the 1.5 mile 15 minutes
My time: 10.37 My goal: 9 minutes or better
Sprint 25 yard in 20 seconds or less
My time:? My goal: 8-10 seconds
Push-up's Min of 16 in one minute
Me: 43
Sit-up's Min of 29 in one minute
Me: 66

Hard Boiled eggs and Tuna? (1/6/05)

2005-01-12T04:49:00.000-08:00

It's all about the Hard boiled eggs and tuna.

Every once in a while I get on this kick of working out all the time.. for like two or three hours.
Well, when this happens my diet seems to change with the added activity. I don't make any conscious efforts to change it. It just shifts over from wanting a big burger and fries to a can of tuna and two hard boiled eggs. From a bag of Oreos to an orange.
Not to say it all changes and I become this carb counting freak of the southwest or anything, I just start eating things I wouldn't normally on a daily basis.
That and some days I just want stake.. not just a little eight ounce flank stake.. I'm talking meat.. like a one inch porterhouse. But that's it, no potatoes, no corn, or biscuits. I don't want any salad or rice.
Who knows? It makes me feel "heather" somehow.
I just felt I had to share that little bit about me ever changing life.

Bickering again
C__ and I had a good bickering last night before she got home.
Around 2pm yesterday I got a message on my phone saying, you only have 10 minutes of whenever time left on your phone until the 10th of January. No big thing, we go over quite often by a couple of minutes. But still not enough to upgrade to the next plan.
Anyway
C__ called me around 3:30pm because she was out in her truck running some check to the bank for work. So I told her what I had gotten and that about five-minutes before her call I got another that said, we were now over our whenever minutes for the month. She took t as an attack on her. Like I was saying, dammit C__ why in gods name do you talk so much? I told her, "Babe, I'm accusing you of talking to much, we both have phones on the same plan. I talk on it too. I was just telling you so you could be careful how long you're on the phone for until the 10th."
She can back with, "What you don't think I got the same message?" I said ," Well I didn't know, I was just making sure that we..." She cuts me off to say, "Besides my message says we have 45 minutes."

It went on like this for about ten more minutes back and forth until we were fighting about fighting (always a crowd pleaser), and of course she got all up and mad saying that once again "I'm blaming her for everything." I was at a loss for words due to the fact that I was only trying to inform her that we were about to be out of free time on the phone.
She got mad and hung up on me. I learned this act means don't call me I'll call you.

About 5:40pm C__ calls me laughing saying at 5:20 she got a message that said we are now over or minutes. Also that she was sorry see went all ballistic on me. Chalk it up to the heifer at her work making her nuts.

Mother in-law moving in?
C__'s mom might be coming to say for a while. I'm ok with it.. I think..
The only thing I'm worried about is all her stuff. I hate clutter and boxes of stuff. C__'s mom has a whole two bedroom apartment full of stuff. Not that we couldn't accommodate the amount of her stuff in our house. There's enough room for it. It's just, I don't want to move all our stuff around.. I hate that part.
Is it wrong to charge her money?
I want to say like $400 a month. Flat, it that bad?
She will use the loft a bathroom and probably both the front bedrooms for her things, which equates to half our home for the most part. No to mention the space in the garage for all her other seasonal crap. So maybe asking for a little money isn't that bad after all.
That and we can get her to pay for a cable connection I bet. Then I'll just pull the router in the garage and tap into the phone line so every phone jack becomes a possible connection for the internet. Dam I'm smart. Sometimes.

I'll keep ya' posted..

D Rant

2005-01-11T20:06:00.000-08:00

3 names you go by:
George,Mike,Michael
3 things you like about yourself:
-My eye's, they're a Smokey blue on most days (don't believe me? Just go look at Murphy's picture of me), My smile with the exception of one tooth that's off alignment, I would have to say I'm overall pleased with my outlook on life.. It' may be bleak from time to time, but hey back off like you never had a bad day.
3 things you hate/dislike about yourself:
I'm always "running the books" going all budget crazy, OCD about the carpet, it always has to look puffy, like you're walking on a cloud or something
ADD, need I say more.
3 things that scare you:
C__ when she's all crazy mad, big angry dogs, haunted houses, I don't care how lame this thing is, back in the day I was forced to walk threw one (age 7 maybe) scared the bagezzums outta me. Maybe a story for another time.
3 of your everyday essentials:
Bloging is pretty high on the list, the sweet nectar of the gods A.K.A. Coffee dark and full of caffeine, showers, I've realized more so recently than ever before..I have this man smell after about eight hours of consciousness it never was there before but by god it's there now.
3 things you're wearing right now:
I have a kick ace work supplied uniform on at the moment.
"Hot" Item number one, one awesome dark blue polo with a white stripe on the edge of the collar, the sleeves, and the pocket.
"Hot" Item number two, Dockers, "nice pants." need I say more. O' except that the legs at to short and the waste is about three sizes to big.
Finally "Hot" Item number three, Boxer briefs, providing all the care and safety of a brief while giving you all that freedom of boxers. AAhhhh..
3 of your favorite bands/artists:
How about..Willie Nelson.. or George Strait.. Sometime I'm down for a little Dre or Snoop dogg too. It all depends.
3 of your favorite songs at present:
Whiskey River.... Disco inferno, and Shadows on the wall.
2 truths and a lie:
I love my wife, I used to weigh 310 lbs now 195, and I'm not addicted to caffeine, I'm just not a quitter.
3 careers you're considering/would consider:
At the current moment I'm having a shifting of the tides as far as all that is concerned. So lets see I could work in animation, the PD, or a male dance club, with my hot body and compulsion of not wearing pant this comes quite naturally don't you think
3 people who may enjoy taking a quiz:
P-Riddy, he is the only person I will choose to submit to the random questions provided in this little bit of heaven. Sucker

(1/10/05) Time for the "next step."

2005-01-10T15:33:00.000-08:00

Posted by P-Riddy
Written BY D-Rant

Up until now.. I've always had "jobs." I think this is my downfall as far as my completed self is concerned.
I don't need a job anymore, I need something I'm goanna and want to devote my time and brain to. So let me run this by you, then you can call me crazy and laugh all you want.
I for some reason feel that I'm not "doing my part" but by the same token I don't feel the need to fly over seas to get my ace shot off in the middle of some desert.
So why not do it here?
That's right folks D Rant in his infinite wisdom and mild insanity would like to try out to become a officer of the law. Stranger things have happened.. I think.
I have a information seminar to attend on the 18th of this month, to find out all thin info on the tryouts and testing possess.

I realize that it's not all lethal weapon or C.S.I. when you become a police officer. But I can still see the benefits of it all.

(Musical intermission.....)
That was Whiskey River by Willie Nelson.

Reactions have been mixed. Most were good, due to the fact that I finally decided to finally get out and go after something. Here's the breakdown

P-Riddy:
Perfect response for a best friend to give. He said, "Yeah I've always though of you doing something like that."

C__:
Totally backs me the whole way. Plus due to the high divorce rate among the ranks of police officers.. I've made her swear not to leave me. (Not that it was a serious worry)

Sis and Brother in-law:
Overall one of the most receptive and positive responses I received was from the two of them.

Dad:
Not so good.. He responded with a, "Well I don't think it's such a good idea."

This is to be expected from my parents thou.

Example one:
My 27 year old sister says, "Brother in-law and I are gong to have a baby!"
Parents respond with, "You're a little to young don't you think?"

Example two:
We say, "We're getting married."
Mom pull now wife aside from me to say, "Do you think that's the best idea, this really isn't the right path."

yep full on support from the parents every time, that's what you can't expect.

Until of course you're succeeding at sed item, then it's all smiles and good times.

O and I didn't even tell mom's about what the plan is.. I didn't want to hear how I was goanna get shot right at the moment.

That was the big weekend.

Aside from that
This weekend when I drove to my sisters.. C__ didn't come with, for all you who don't know this is extremely rear, maybe three time since we've been together have C__ and I done thing that the other didn't. That's in like six years time mind you. But it was ok.. just kindda felt like I was missing the other shoe all afternoon.

Hopefully this gets up on the blog soon

(1/6/05)
It's all about the Hard boiled eggs and tuna.

Every once in a while I get on this kick of working out all the time.. for like two or three hours.
Well, when this happens my diet seems to change with the added activity. I don't make any conscious efforts to change it. It just shifts over from wanting a big burger and fries to a can of tuna and two hard boiled eggs. From a bag of Oreos to an orange.
Not to say it all changes and I become this carb counting freak of the southwest or anything, I just start eating things I wouldn't normally on a daily basis.
That and some days I just want stake.. not just a little eight ounce flank stake.. I'm talking meat.. like a one inch porterhouse. But that's it, no potatoes, no corn, or biscuits. I don't want any salad or rice.
Who knows? It makes me feel "heather" somehow.
I just felt I had to share that little bit about me ever changing life.

Bickering again
C__ and I had a good bickering last night before she got home.
Around 2pm yesterday I got a message on my phone saying, you only have 10 minutes of whenever time left on your phone until the 10th of January. No big thing, we go over quite often by a couple of minutes. But still not enough to upgrade to the next plan.
Anyway
C__ called me around 3:30pm because she was out in her truck running some check to the bank for work. So I told her what I had gotten and that about five-minutes before her call I got another that said, we were now over our whenever minutes for the month. She took t as an attack on her. Like I was saying, dammit C__ why in gods name do you talk so much? I told her, "Babe, I'm accusing you of talking to much, we both have phones on the same plan. I talk on it too. I was just telling you so you could be careful how long you're on the phone for until the 10th."
She can back with, "What you don't think I got the same message?" I said ," Well I didn't know, I was just making sure that we..." She cuts me off to say, "Besides my message says we have 45 minutes."

It went on like this for about ten more minutes back and forth until we were fighting about fighting (always a crowd pleaser), and of course she got all up and mad saying that once again "I'm blaming her for everything." I was at a loss for words due to the fact that I was only trying to inform her that we were about to be out of free time on the phone.
She got mad and hung up on me. I learned this act means don't call me I'll call you.

About 5:40pm C__ calls me laughing saying at 5:20 she got a message that said we are now over or minutes. Also that she was sorry see went all ballistic on me. Chalk it up to the heifer at her work making her nuts.

Mother in-law moving in?
C__'s mom might be coming to say for a while. I'm ok with it.. I think..
The only thing I'm worried about is all her stuff. I hate clutter and boxes of stuff. C__'s mom has a whole two bedroom apartment full of stuff. Not that we couldn't accommodate the amount of her stuff in our house. There's enough room for it. It's just, I don't want to move all our stuff around.. I hate that part.
Is it wrong to charge her money?
I want to say like $400 a month. Flat, it that bad?
She will use the loft a bathroom and probably both the front bedrooms for her things, which equates to half our home for the most part. No to mention the space in the garage for all her other seasonal crap. So maybe asking for a little money isn't that bad after all.
That and we can get her to pay for a cable connection I bet. Then I'll just pull the router in the garage and tap into the phone line so every phone jack becomes a possible connection for the internet. Dam I'm smart. Sometimes.

I'll keep ya' posted..

D Rant

Big Things

2005-01-05T09:39:00.000-08:00

Posted by P-Riddy For D-Rant in his hour of need....

I woke up on Monday same as always.
Got ready same as always then drove to work, just like any other day.

Then it happened...
The devils in the IT department blocked Blogger.com
It has been added to the "control list."

See what happens is IT reviews everyone's account from time to time
and looks in on your most visited links.
Then blocks them.

So what we're goanna have to do is set up something where I post
through E-mail. and everything that get commented on is also set back
to E-mail..

See they were smart.
The people in the IT department did block blogger.com..
But chose to forgo blocking the .blogspot.com tag proceeding
every blog title, so this means I can still come and read up on what's
going on.. but if you use the standard blogger comments ability and
not something like halo then I can't leave a comment on your page.
But if you have E-Mail.. I'll just send it to you, and maybe.. if you
like me maybe you'll post it for me, third party style.

Ok so what else is new
Monday..
7pm time to take the dogs to the vet. They've both been coughing.
Not your everyday little polite cough, this is all deep and flemmy and
debilitating. So we took them in and the Vet said it look like a
common cold found in dogs this time of year. So he gave us a
prescription of antibiotics and then did a heartworm test on them
both. It came back negative thank god. then we waited for the scrips
of Heartgaurd and Antibiotics, then it was time to pay.. and pay we
did.

$230.00 freaken dollars!
what is that? Even I don't coast anywhere near $230 dollars at the doctor.
And I didn't even finish with getting everything yet. I still have to
go to Walgreen's and get the other scripts for their cough
suppressant. I don't even want to know how much that's goanna run.
Then in three week I have to back to the vet and get them all up to
date on their vaccinations.. that's another 100 plus dollars to add to
the total.

So all that "extra" money I made for working the holidays.. yep it's
out like yesterdays trash.

Tuesday was pretty uneventful..
I only have one gripe about the whole day..
Driving in the rain...
I hate with the fire of a thousand suns, driving in the rain.
The act itself I don't mind, but people that rain creates.. I just
can't handle. Coming from Minnesota, were a couple feet of snow
doesn't even slow down most motorists, I can grasp why people act the
way they do when it rains. What's the fear? You're not goanna go
flying off the road just because you're doing the speed limit. The
reason you going down is because I'm goanna rear end you off the road
just to get you the Fu.. outta my way.

Another interesting fact..

Arizona+Rain=Big ace puddles and washes everywhere

This state was not made for water. At least not the kind we got.
Our house is kinnda on the outside of town, so the roads are just you
simple everyday two lain roads, no drainage except what ditches where
trenched out to catch runoff from the little misting rains we normally
get.
Also due to the locating of our house.. there are only two roads in or out.
Well yesterday one was closed due to seven inches of standing water
and the other was under about three inches of water along with having
two washes to drive through. That was the good way to drive
yesterday mourning.
So I got to work at 6:05am which according to the man in charge was
one minute shy of late. Sweet!

I made pizza yesterday,
Not just went a bought the 2 for ten special pizza at the store, baked
it and called it good..
Due to C__ strange "beef allergy" as we call it. I have to be careful
in what I buy.
So I went and picked up some turkey sausage, and pepperoni (also
turkey) while my dough was rising. That's right the Kitchen Aid got
it's second chance to prove itself worthy and passed like a champ.
So yesterdays dinner consisted of a fresh hot home made pizza make
just the way I like it.
O' and I made the sauce too but that's not hard. Just a few cans of
stewed tomato's and a little heat and time.

So this is how it'll be from now one. hopefully they don't take
everything away from me and block out all of you guys..
Then truly I will go insane.

That is unless I can get the single from the neighbors hookup. I told
them I wanted to.. they said, "Pay half." Not a bad deal in the long
run. It'll be wireless for $20 a month internet.

Best quote ever

2005-01-04T12:11:00.000-08:00

...to emphasize the afterlife is to deny life. To concentrate on
Heaven is to create hell. In their desperate longing to transcend the
disorderliness, friction, and unpredictability that pesters life; in
their desire for a fresh start in a tidy habitat, germ-free and
secured by angels, religious multitudes are gambling the only life
they may ever have on a dark horse in a race that has no finish
line."

Tom Robbins (1936 - ), _Skinny Legs and All_, 1990, p. 305.

Not to worry

2005-01-02T11:54:00.000-08:00

The Aftermath..
I'm not dead, it think.
Not to say I didn't feel like it for about half of the day yesterday..
Needless to say new years was a good one. We went to the neighbors and brought a whole load of people with us. Not to mention there was already about twenty people either there or on the way by the time we "arrived" (walked across the street).

C__ was looking dam fine.
She was wearing a black top that had lace around the top and bottom of if. The kind were it almost could be a piece of lingerie, but it's not that reveling. Along with some brand new pants that make her ass look like it was carved out of stone.

I was in the boot cut blue jeans from the gap a pair of redwings (like doc's except functional too), and a black button up that look like swade.

Over the course of the evening there were many things drank. I started slow with the typical, "Sure I'll have a Coors light."
But in no time of course P-Riddys Wife and I had to crack the bottle of Cuervo, nothing gets her happier faster than a good shot of Cuervo and who am I to deny that.
Then it was back Coors.
But only for about... two minutes, right up until someone said, "Hey, who wants to do a Yegger Shot?"
O' that would be me..
Make it two..

So it's about 10 and all's well in the land of D Rant. I'm all numb and happily sipping my beer talking with.. with.. well I'll have to get back to you on that. But not to worry I wasn't done with the mass beating I was planning to give my body by a long shot. It was not about fifteen minutes since my last shot.. humm what's next. Well that bottle of Jack is looking pretty good right about now.. What the hell right. By now I wasn't into "Measuring" or "pouring." This one came straight out the bottle.

Que Neighbor running form bathroom saying, "Man it was the coolest thing I've ever seen. She threw up but it happened like the Matrix. She was sitting in the counter and was able to catch it all before it hit the floor."
Well party seems to be picking up.

By now it's about 11:40,
You know what time it is right? That's right it's time to blow fire with Bacarde 151. How did you ever guess?
So we held a little fire blowing show out in the front yard. There are some great picture floating around on someone’s phone, but I don't remember who's it was.
Don't get all crazy, D rant wasn't the one blowing fire that night. I don't know how. So I instead did what I knew. I lit my whole right hand in a rather hot blaze of 151 so my fire blowing friend had something to stat his with.
So know I'm drunk with a hand of fire, somehow God still loves me because I didn't even singe the hairs on my arm.

5..4..3..2..1..Ding ding ding...
12:00
Yeah.. Kiss kiss
I don't even think I had any Champagne but I know I kissed C__.
Then I was right back to unbridle stupidity.
For his next trick D Rant will take a firework the size of a small box of cereal and run down the street with it like he's delivering the Olympic torch to Athens.
Minimal sulfur burns on left hand. They don't even hurt anymore.
The next few hours are mostly a blur of unrelated images and then it was about 3 am and everyone was rapping it up for the night. P-Riddy's wife went to bed earlier so it was C__, P-Riddy, and me walking home.
I know somewhere in there C__ and I had to "Go to the bathroom."
Then C__ went to bed and it was just me and P-Riddy. We walked the block and talked about crazy wife’s and our sometime over dramatic lives until about 5 am when we "fell asleep" in the garage. Then somehow I got to the couch instead of my own bed. Only to be woken up at 9am to C__ tapping me on the shoulder asking if I wanted Jack in the Box.
After a vary tight eyed gut spinning moment I sat up and said, "Sure."
There was a collective "O God" as we got up one by one.
People stayed until about 10 or so then filtered home to nurse their own pain. C__ and I laid around for about three more hours. Then laid on each other for about an hour.
Unfortunately we had to stop since our presence was requested at an after New Years get together at my Gma's house.

Then it was back to the house.
We veged out and watched TV for the rest of the day.

Note to self:
Meatballs are not Tums nor Rolaids. They will not help if you can feel every piece of you insides already

Updated and Graduated

2004-12-30T13:37:00.000-08:00

In Lue of recent events in my unstable self we will be redefining and redesigning the Rant of Unstable Individuals blog. Please stand by...

Am I the Next Hank Hill?

2004-12-30T13:03:00.000-08:00

Searching for inspiration..
Anyone else out there have to do that?
Sometime I just sit here in front of this vast blank screen wondering.. What in God's name am I supposed to write about? What's worth writing about? I'm not one to cover big breaking news, it's not my style. Yes I stay up to date and do my fair share of reading, but to me personally.
I just think, there's someone out there, that dedicated the better part of their lives to bring this news to the people. Something tells me I'm not goanna be quite up to par. That and I don't like grabbing an article and pasting it into my post just as filler. Face it if I wanted to share some info about some current events, I'd just like to the page and leave it at that.

That and I feel overall my life has slowed to this repetitive and stable pace. Where vary little changes from day to day or even week to week.

I feel kind of like I'm becoming Hank Hill or something.
I take pride in a clean car and a neat yard.. I strive to pay all bills on time or sooner. I pay my taxes and give to charities. But where the hell is all this taking me?
I don't want to wake up one mourning and say to myself, "Well D you made it 95 and all's still about the same dam game as it was 72 years ago. Time to go let out the dogs and make coffee"

There are people who's lives live out like great books. Then there are others who wouldn't make the worst of soap's or lifetime movies. Hell some wouldn't even be the worst of action movies either
Mine's kinda that sitcom that's on TV for about three episodes then gets pulled and replaced by reruns of "Friend's" the first season or M.A.S.H.

Yeah I'll go to the New year's party across the street. Get tanked over the course of the night. Come home. Maybe fool around with C__. Pass out. Wake up with a huge hangover and then bam life goes on.

Maybe that's it.. I have no hunt, I don't need to stalk or impress. Hell I can go without shaving for so long I look like a yeti, C__ doesn't care anymore. Maybe C__ right I'm just doing enough to get by in life. I think I need to figure some Sh.. out about me and what kindda' person I want to be. Not for the rest of my life or anything, but just for now, who do I want to be for now. Obviously who I am at the present moment just isn't cutting it anymore.

That's it a refurbish and remanufactured D Rant is on the way ladies and gentleman. Boy's and girls of all ages..
Get ready and put your hands together for the new improved D Rant Master.

Have fun where ever you go for New Year's.. Have one for me.. have two.. hell just pass me the bottle.

Quotes

2004-12-29T14:31:00.000-08:00

Some interesting quotes about marriage that I found today, and thought
I would share.

The conception of two people living together for twenty-five years without
having a cross word suggests a lack of spirit only to be admired in sheep.
Alan Patrick Herbert

A successful marriage is an edifice that must be rebuilt every day.
Andre Maurois (1885 - 1967)

All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art
of making love. Good battle is objective and honest - never vicious or cruel.
Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principle
of equal partnership.
Ann Landers (1918 - 2002)

A simple enough pleasure, surely, to have breakfast alone with one's husband,
but how seldom married people in the midst of life achieve it.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh

I used to believe that marriage would diminish me, reduce my options. That you
had to be someone less to live with someone else when, of course, you have to be
someone more.
Candice Bergen (1946 - )

All marriages are mixed marriages.
Chantal Saperstein

There's only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is
I'll get married again.
Clint Eastwood (1930 - )

A great marriage is not when the 'perfect couple' comes together. It is when an
imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences.
Dave Meurer, "Daze of Our Wives"

Marriage. It's like a cultural hand-rail. It links folks to the past and guides
them to the future.
Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Our Wedding, 1992

Man's best possession is a sympathetic wife.
Euripides (484 BC - 406 BC), Antigone

Never say that marriage has more of joy than pain.
Euripides (484 BC - 406 BC), Alcestis, 438 B.C.

One man's folly is another man's wife.
Helen Rowland (1876 - 1950)

Nearly all marriages, even happy ones, are mistakes: in the sense that almost
certainly (in a more perfect world, or even with a little more care in this very
imperfect one) both partners might be found more suitable mates. But the real
soul-mate is the one you are actually married to.
J. R. R. Tolkien (1892 - 1973), Letter to Michael Tolkien, March 1941

I pay very little regard...to what any young person says on the subject of
marriage. If they profess a disinclination for it, I only set it down that they
have not yet seen the right person.
Jane Austen (1775 - 1817), Mansfield Park

Intimacy is what makes a marriage, not a ceremony, not a piece of paper from the
state.
Kathleen Norris

If there was strife and contention in the home, very little else in life could
compensate for it.
Lawana Blackwell, The Courtship of the Vicar's Daughter, 1998

Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
Mae West (1892 - 1980)

Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you
haven't wasted a whole day.
Mickey Rooney (1920 - )

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the
same person.
Mignon McLaughlin

My toughest fight was with my first wife.
Muhammad Ali (1942 - )

We were happily married for eight months. Unfortunately, we were married for
four and a half years.
Nick Faldo

If you would marry suitably, marry your equal.
Ovid (43 BC - 17 AD)

That is what marriage really means: helping one another to reach the full status
of being persons, responsible and autonomous beings who do not run away from
life.
Paul Tournier

A good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the individuals and
in the way they express their love.
Pearl Buck (1892 - 1973)

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to
annoy for the rest of your life.
Rita Rudner

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.
Rita Rudner

When I meet a man I ask myself, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend
their weekends with?'
Rita Rudner

Happiness just wasn't part of the job description back then. You tried to find a
helpmate to keep the cold wind and dogs at bay. Happiness just wasn't part of
the equation. Survival was.
Robin Green, Northern Exposure, Burning Down the House, 1992

Such is the common process of marriage. A youth and maiden exchange meeting by
chance, or brought together by artifice, exchange glances, reciprocate
civilities, go home, and dream of one another. Having little to divert
attention, or diversify thought, they find themselves uneasy when they are
apart, and therefore conclude that they shall be happy together. They marry, and
discover what nothing but voluntary blindness had before concealed; they wear
out life in altercations, and charge nature with cruelty.
Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784), Rasselas

There is no observation more frequently made by such as employ themselves in
surveying the conduct of mankind, than that marriage, though the dictate of
nature, and the institution of Providence, is yet very often the cause of
misery, and that those who enter into that state can seldom forbear to express
their repentance, and their envy of those whom either chance or caution hath
withheld from it.
Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784), Rambler #18

The Bain of my blogstance

2004-12-29T08:20:00.000-08:00

I have a all new bone to pick with this next round of new blogs being published..

1.
Bad layout..
Look I know you just got your new favorite book on how to write CSS and steel java script and you're dieing to try it all out at one time. But really people lets take a minute and look.. really look at how you've set your blog up to function.
I understand you love sailor moon or whoever the hell that gigantic pixlated image is but in what way does this provids any info about you except you have no backgound in griaphics or anything related to it.
Also
If where your blog post is located is harder to find than the back button.. Well then I'm sorry but I'll see you later.
Bloger makes you select a layout in the beggining.. do so and leave it alone. Unless by some stroke of unbeleavable luck you actualy know what the hell you're doing and why.

2.
Chances are if I wanted to see snow, I'd look at the weater channel.

3.
Lets just say for a molment I wanted to se falling hearts, I'd rip yours out and throw it on the ground.

4.
And if I wanted fifteen alert messages prior to reaching you page I would deleat a bunch of sh.. from the root dyrectory..
Atualy why don't you go do that to yours. I here it makes your system go faster.. no really.

5.
Font selection, look it goes a little something like this. We all, for the most part have all the fonts we would ever need or want to have on our systems at any giving time, so if you can't make a list of O' lets just say the top four most people have that you want you page to be veiwed in.. Well then Fuc. off

6.
This being the most important of all..
Midi music..
Lets sat hypotheticly I not only wanted to hear Ahley Simpson. But I only wanted to hear the whole song like it was coming out as a ring tone on my phone. Well then I'd search my ass over to T-mobil.com and buy the thing for $1.99.
Take a hint from some of our better bloggers and if you would like to share your passion for a certan song or artist.. set up a media player one the sidebar, also please for the love of God locate the sidebar somewhere near the side of the page. That would be great.

Yes I know I've wrote about some of this before, but it seem that latly thing have just been getting worse by the day. I felt if I didn't say something I was just going to go postal in someones comments section, if I could find the damm thing.

Suger Anyone?

2004-12-28T09:36:00.000-08:00

We just got 12 dozen.. that's right 144 doughnuts..
The Krispy Kreme people dropped of an order today.. The cafeterias closed. I asked the manager what they wanted to do.. She said, "Well we already bought them. Give them away, or they'll go bad."

So if anyone lives in the Scottsdale area of AZ and wants a few free doughnuts well swing on by and I'll kick some over to you..

Is there Love?

2004-12-28T08:11:00.000-08:00

Bare with me for a moment here..

I think I have something to say...

When people marry young I think there's a different dynamic that goes into it all.. So you must be sure there are so many peaces to the puzzle that make you two.. be one. Not just the warm and fuzzy kind of love that we all feel when someone new is around. Trust in this.. that fades in time.

But is there unbreakable love. People use all these metaphors for love,

Love moves mountains.. but that's not right, people move mountain.
But ask yourself, can you wait for your other while they are gone moving mountains for you? Will you stand by them if they fail?

Is love trust? I don't think so..

Relationships are built on many pieces to make a whole that fills our void.
Safety
Trust
Love
Lust
All these make up what you need together.

Don't stay because it's "normal" or "comfortable." That will serve to be worthless in the end. Chairs are comfortable, not relationships.
Don't stay because without them, the bills wont get paid. That's just stupidity..

Talk.. often.

Not about the everyday stuff that you cover of how's your day and what's going on for dinner tonight.. Talk about what makes you unhappy talk about what you like covering up, the things that you could say.. "Can we just forget about this? Can we just go back to normal?" Because in truth, you don't forget, normal is liquid, never the same from minute to minute, and every day you hold this unfinished anger is another day of lying about who you are and what you believe to be true. This is no life, this is an existence.
Cows exist, people live.

Hold each other.
I don't mean in that classic Lifetime movie fashion with the slow motion and soft lenses. There is a place in the one that you love that you fit, find that place.

Love at first sight?
Not true..
Lust at first sight..
Possible.

Find a way to see the humor in as many fights as you can. Not the issue itself but how it was dealt with.
If every fight can't end as a discussion. There's a problem.

Know yourself and where you want to be.
That way you will know how far you have to go to move your own mountain.

Who knows if any of this made sense.. but if it did, and you not necessary learned from it.. but at least took something from it and see it to be true.. well then I'm not as crazy as I thought I once was.

gmail invites

2004-12-27T14:33:00.000-08:00

If anyone is still lacking a gmail account I have 6 new invites. You
must post a joke as a comment on this post, and an email address where
I can send the invite to, if you want one that is.

Christmas.. It's not just for giving anymore

2004-12-27T08:49:00.000-08:00

Well this Christmas was a strange one. We went to my folks house the day of and did the whole "Christmas thing" O' and I did the whole one to many beers thing, where I start saying whatever little things come into my mind.

But O' well, the take was good and the hangover was minimal.

I got the Kitchen Aid mixer..
Now the bread making really begins
I was such a little kid with the new mixer. The moment I got home I unpacked it and washed out the bowl. Then pored in some cream and sugar just to make whip cream. What for? Well nothing really, but now that I just noticed I have a bowl of whipped cream at home.. I'm getting a few ideas.

Along with a single cup coffee maker.
Now I don't have to drink the 1oW-30 that comes out of the coffee maker here, I went and got myself some nice Columbian roast last night and made it whilst running hap hazerdly through the house getting ready.

We cleaned up pretty good on the cash front too.
C__'s dad and my parent gave us each $100 so she's out spending her's $200 today on hair and nails or something.
I however have already spent about $120 on other things, but at the current moment have no idea what. I hate that.

Other than that Christmas was for the most part over before it started this year. I mean yeah there was that whole holy jolly feel and everything, but by Christmas day I was just kinda ready to be done. The tree's dead and the lights have to come down. It's like you build up this panicle day in your mind then it hits and you wonder why it doesn't feel the same as it used to.

Here's my take on it.
When you where a kid everyone else used to make the day and the time of the year for you. Dads and moms would set up the tree and put out the gifts. Get to stockings hung and get all the family together on that one special day O' gift giving.

But know I am one of the "grown-up's." I bought and decorated a tree and rapped all the gifts. I helped make the meals and the she duals of when to have our little get together. Maybe that's why it had such a lack luster effect this year.. It's not as fun to be, when your behind the curtain. Seeing what's behind the twinkle of the lights and the sparkle of the tinsel. Already knowing what in every box.

O' well hopefully new years holds some better times.

We'll be going across the street to party. I plan on being way to drunk to drive, but as long as I can see my house.. I should be able to crawl/ walk/ fall, at it until I get there.

And P-Riddy.. you better show.
Or I'm comin' to get you ass and dragging you there with me.

I really have nothing worthy to write about at the moment..
I feel kinda spent.

I'm here.. Late

2004-12-27T08:12:00.000-08:00

That's right I made it here.. late to work today.

I went something like this.

C__: Baby do you have to work today?

Me: Yeah why?

C__: It's 6:30.

Me:O' Fu%& I was supposed to be there thirty minutes ago!

C__: Blah Blah Blah

Me: O' crap O' crap O' crap!
(Running downstairs to get my phone and call to tell them I'm on the way)

Que the phone drama...

Me: Dammit the phone's dead where the Fu$&'s my charger!
(running out to my car holy hell it's 40 degree out here)
Note to self: Turn on light in garage from this time on so as not to crush foot into weight bench again.

Let out dogs, start coffee (mmm coffee) back upstairs.. Shower brush teeth clothes
Flash forward.

Time 6:52

In the car and off to work.

Only a forty minute drive ahead of me.

So I rolled up at 7:40, not to bad all thing considered.

That and today is a holiday for the rest of the plant so it's paid. Which mean that me time is already covered and all I have to do is show up, my time here is just extra time in my paycheck.

More on Christmas momentarily.

2004-12-23T13:42:00.000-08:00

Que Tinny Tim:

Marry Christmas....
Everyone

Have a happy holiday everybody.
Here's hopein' you all get what you want, no matter what that may be.

See ya'll on Monday..

50 things about me too

2004-12-23T10:33:00.000-08:00

1 I'm a Phoenix Arizona native(I've lived here all of my life).
2 Just because it's a dry heat doesn't make it tolerable.
3 I was raised Bible Christian.
4 I'm an athiest.
5 I'm 22 years old, married with two german shepards(Rosey and Sassie).
6 I still hate some people from as far back as fourth grade(even if
they have grown up).
7 I'm ashamed of our president and wish some one would help him see
that an early retirement would benifit the nation.
8 I'm ashamed of how stupid the people in our country are.
9 I'm egotistical and egocentric, more so than most of the people I know.
10 Conversly I harbor lots of self-loathing.
11 My wife is the most important person in my life, yet every day I
wake up asking myself if I did the right thing by getting married.
12 I got married at 19 to my high school girlfriend.
13 I have never slept with anyone except my wife.
14 The first time I wrote the previous sentence I used the word
'thing' instead of person.
15 I love all kinds of music. Yes that includes
country,rap,classical,techno,rock,metal etc.
16 I am easily addicted to all of the "wrong" things. ie.
sex,drugs,gambling etc.
17 I have never done illegal drugs, though I had many opportunities at
ages as young as 10.
18 I saw my first hardcore porn at 7 or 8.
19 I first relized my parents lied to me often when we had the "sex"
talk when I was probably between 5-7.
20 I have learned that formal education is over rated.
21 I feel more educated than almost everyone I meet even though I only
have an Associates Degree.
22 I listen to NPR every day, and read 2-3 books a month(mostly fiction).
23 I love the Harry Potter Series.
24 I have almost every fiction book every written by Tom Clancy, and
have read them all.
25 I love paintballing.
26 I think that more people in this world should be killed/youthenized.
27 I think that war in iraq is a good thing, but instead of sending in
troops we should have just dropped a nuke on Bagdad.
28 I have relized that there is no such thing as the sanctity of life,
it's an illusion that we believe so that we can feel good about being
alive.
29 When I die I wont care, thus I am only a little affraid of death.
30 I am a Web Developer and expert in Coldfusion.
31 I believe that religion is a disease that will ultimatly kill every
person on the planet.
32 All extremists should be removed from society.
33 George W. Bush is an extreamist.
34 I hate buying gifts for people, to a large extent I don't like
recieving gifts from people.
35 I smoke occasionally(1-10 ciggeretts a month).
36 I find it funny that others can't control this habbit.
37 Nothing in moderation is bad for you.
38 I believe that I can manipulate anyone if I try hard enough.
39 I don't manipulate my friends.
40 I believe in friendship above ALL things, yes even family.
41 Respect is earned not given.
42 I have been somewhat depressed for the last 3-4 years.
43 I am starting to get better now that I have made changes in my life
and got a good job.
44 When I was a kid my best friend was a felon, 2 years older than me.
45 In 6th grade I didn't tell anyone about the crimes I knew he was commiting.
46 I hate him, and one other person more than anyone else in the
world, and would happliy flip the switch at their execution.
47 Some people are better off dead.
48 Family can destroy you if you believe in it too strongly.
49 I spend too much on entertainment(D-Rant knows what I mean).
50 I wish I had my life to do all over again.

Well lets see here...

2004-12-23T07:05:00.000-08:00

50 Things about me..

1. I have a fear of getting my tongue stuck to the spoon when taking the first bite of really cold ice cream.

2. I moved from a extremely small town in Minnesota at thirteen to Phx AZ.

3. When I was thirteen I helped my friend take his cousins bike.

4. It was stolen from me a week latter. (Karma)

5. I love Monster Tacos from Jack in the Box.

6. I'm 23 with a house two dogs and a wife.

7. My mother is paraplegic and has been since she was fifteen.

8. I know how to drive with hand controls in a car. (Due to the previous statement)

9. When I was seven I got hit in the face one the bus ride home. The bus driver didn't stop.

10. I’ve only been in one fight.. I was nine.

11. I won.

12. I hate turkey sandwiches after Thanksgiving.

13. I got pulled over once and told the officer, "I was in a hurry to go get gas." He let me go.

14. I once ate a quarter of a cup of salt on a dare.

15. I once ate fourteen Corn dogs without a dare.

16. I weighed 310 lbs my Junior year of high school.

17. Flash forward.. weight 190 lbs my Senior year.

18. I want out of this job.

19. I love Starbucks iced Chi-Tea.

20. I have a degree in 3d 2d and Flash Animation

21. Making bread gives me peace.

22. I believe in God/ Higher power.

23. I don't believe in Church.

24. I blog for my own heath.

25. C__ doesn't know there is a Blog.

26. When I was 18 I had a 86 Firebird and got a ticket doing 89 in a 55. (He got me while I was slowing down I guess)

27. I can't bring myself to read the news paper.. If it's on paper.

28. When I was 10 I pulled up on my handlebars on my bike while going down the street, and they came off. I still have a scar.

29. When I was eleven, I bit my tongue so hard I could only eat apple sauce for a week.

30. I think tattoos are addictive.

31. I lost my virginity when I was seventeen.

32. To the woman who is now my wife.

33. I didn't plan it like that, she was just the first to "give it up."

34. I saw my first "adult-film" when I was eight. I was called "Cinderella." Dam Disney flicks.

35. I actually like running.

36. Once while cheering for ASU I tested positive for ephedrine. (Oops, already banned by the N.C.A.A. But not yet illegal to buy) They sent me to see a shrink. He told me I was externally focused (No Sh.. buddy I was a cheerleader).

37. I can count all the girls I've "been with" on one hand.. Missing two fingers.

38. I can roll my tongue.

39. C__ said I have a magic tongue.

40. I suck at spelling.

41. I lived in a dorm for a semester. I slept there four times.

42. When I was fifteen seven month (legal age to start working) and a week I started working.

43. I have Sponge bob Square pants on my cell phone.

44. Most people don't know I know Spanish. Witch makes it fun to listen to what people are saying about you behind your back.

45. I used to weld horse shoe art.

46. I'm a little bit Country.

47. I'm a dog person.

48. I pored concrete for my father in-law for a year. It was one of the most fulfilling jobs I ever had.

49. I dance like a white boy..

50. I addicted to the Subway Spicy Italian sub on honey oat bread.

Marry Christmas Eve.. Eve.

This is my Friday so I'll see ya'll after Christmas. I don't work again until Monday.

It's a love Hate thing...

2004-12-22T06:46:00.000-08:00

Pistachios..
It's something C__ and I started getting every Christmas a few years ago. I don't know why we got them the first year, but now it's just on of those thing you have to have to "make Christmas." I don't even like them that much either. There kinda weird tasting and get all stuck in my teeth, but we have to buy the big jar of them from CostCo. every year religiously. It's the same with the huge "tin o' popcorn." You know the kind, it the tin that has three kinds of stale popcorn, caramel, cheese powder, and butter. Has anyone ever in the history of Christmas popcorn tin ever gotten one that isn't stale? I don't think so.

Yesterday I was supposed to come back to post again.. but I got all into my Network Security trainings.. I got two of the three-hour trainings done in about four hours. Now only like fifteen more I want to do and I'll be all good to interview for a position in Special Contracts when it opens up. That means money.. fat fat money. O' and no uniforms. Yes we do wear uniforms, sort of. See it's a blue Polo and Dockers (Nice Pants) with black shoes and a belt. So it's uniform to the security staff but everyday wear to everyone else. Weekends, and plant shutdowns off..
This all is a big huge set of "if and then's" to get me to that position. If my pops gets promoted one set higher and if more spots open in the basement (AKA Special Contracts) and if they feel I'm qualified, then I have a chance.

Mmmm French Roast,
You sweet sweet nectar of the gods sent to help me through the unchallenging day here at the sweatbox.
When did I really start liking coffee? Well that was a long time ago, but more to the point when did I start needing coffee? I no longer can make it through a day here without some sort of caffeine assistance. Not just a cup of coffee or a can of coke. I'm talking heavy hitting, like a pot of coffee or two 16 oz. energy drinks.
I think I built my resistance to stimulants a long time ago. Back when I was working out to loose all my weight. I would take Xenadrine (the old kind with ephedrine) and that stuff blows and pot of coffee clear out of the water. Yeah it was a different type of go power but the result was the same overall. I would wake up and take two go workout for an hour and a half then to class for the day. Take two or three more for practice in the afternoon and maybe one more before my nighttime run. Yeah I could stay up from 5am to 2am the next mourning and not be tired, but I also got everything done. Because face it you have to have a super human amount of time in the day to be able to do everything expected of you.

But now ephdra is all illegal and banned and blah blah blah. Just because some dumbass kids thought that taking ten of them before working out for six straight hours followed by running and playing a basketball game would be ok..
Look I sorry but if you take to much caffeine it'll stop your heart too but that's not being pull off the shelves any time soon. You know why. Because every morning the Surgeon General Mr. Richard Carmona wakes up every I'm sure he runs to a hot cup of Joe.

Sweet lord more Christmas goodness,
So a lady just dropped of a huge Rubbermaid full of Peanut butter square fudge and two kinds of Rice Krispy Treats.
Once again I will be making a judgment call.
Since Rice Krispy were originally intended as a breakfast food.. Now that they are in bar form.. are they still a breakfast food? I think yes.
Mmmm breakfast..

So everyone's coming into work today, but it's only for just long enough to check E-Mails, change the message on their voice mail to say "Ha ha ha I'm not here again until the 4th of January, so F U." Then they get the hell out of here like marathon runners.

Well Marry Christmas Eve.. Eve...Eve to all.

Freedom..

2004-12-21T08:17:00.000-08:00

I'm looking for finical freedom.
See right now everything seems to come up and then bam we have chump change left in the bank. It's not that I mind budgeting or projecting costs of things, I've done that for years. But I just want to have a little left over when I'm done. Stupid stuff costing stupid money. Why can't we just barter for goods again.. I'll tell you why. Because you first have to have something someone else wants.
O' well paying the bills always makes me feel broke.

Everyone's all geared up for the plant shutdown. See almost no one will be coming in to work until the 3rd of January.. I say almost everyone because of course I will be coming to work during this joyous time everyone else has off. See the Company makes it some that Christmas eve and day along with new years eve and day are holiday pay.. along with about five other days paid as holiday time. So if you have the ability to have that time off, well it's only goanna cost you about sixteen of your own hours of vacation time.

But that's irrelevant to me since I work most the days anyway. Except this year X-mass and new years fall on my days off.
This equals getting paid to stay home.
Not that me working the closure week is that bad. Every time I work it pays double time and a half.

That's:

My pay
My Pay
Half My Pay+
____________

Fat Holiday Bank

It's like working for a week and taking home two and a half weeks worth of pay.

Someone just dropped off a huge piece of cake.. I mean huge. This sucker's about eight inches high and is a piece of a two-foot wide cake.
Is it wrong to eat cake in the mourning with your coffee? I mean I don't have any doughnuts or anything else to go with it, it's like the same thing, just less "handheld."

Executive decision made.
Cake goes with coffee.
I'll be back later.

Christmas Jr. (smoke clears) The Aftermath..

2004-12-19T09:40:00.000-08:00

Whloe hell out of left fild flys one of the best times I think I've had with C__'s family.. ever. I thought it was goanna just be another blah get togather and we would give eachother gift then do the kiss kiss hug hug, shake hands, and see ya in a few months. But some how we started having a really good time.. O yeah booze. There was lots of booze. That's why I'm hungover at work today.
Everyone was haveing something C__'ss grandma was sipping on a apple-tinny her mom on some wine then beer. Same with her aunt. C__ only had a few Apple-tinny to her criedit last night. I however was the "big spender" of the evening I did Jonnie Walker (red). About a half a bottle for me and I'm fellin'... well I'm not really feelin' much at all at that point.

Since this was Christmas Jr. and all. We got and gave our first round of gifts, always a good time.
C__ was all stingy this year with the Gift funds, then yesterday she wakes me up in the mourning (vary nicely I might add) and after about fourty minuts or so we get out of bed (you can guess what happend in the interum). She says.. hey go back out and buy some real gifts I'll stay here and cook. I told her ok and out the door I went, I was a shopping force to be reconde with.
First to CostCo. to get a spa set for the aunt (she not our favorite person). I still found a huge set for only $40.
Then it's off the Toys r' Us for the "boys" for Michael it's two wireless controlers and Randy got lazer tag. $150. Not bad. Now Michael brought his Girlfriend too so we can't leave her out. Over to Bath and bodyworks.. Little spa set in little red tub with little suffed animal.

Stop breath.....

Ok now over to finish shopping for C__ and also get her Mom something..

Away D Rant.. To Helzberg (Dimonds)
Yes I got C__ dimonds this year. Lots and lots of dimonds all shinny and new. She got the Necklace.. But wate there's more I was looking at that braclet.. it just didn't "do it for me" So I got her This. Now if that doesn't do it for her. P I'm pack my sh.. and on my way to move in, clear off the spare bed. I also got her the new Shania Twain's greatest hits 2.

I bought myself the Esential Willy Nelson. Wrapped it and put it under the tree From: Me To: Me. You know something it still feel good to open something even if you wrapped it yourself. It's a two disc set with every song you could ever want on it... Great for a group of drunks from Oklahoma and one Polock, try it some time. So last night I finaly learned how to two step (country style). Sure I kinda knew before, but now I got it down. We could go out to the bar, and I'd be set.

Whoops sorry there got off on a tangent. Also picked This up for the mom in-law. I couldn't decide on what to get her then I was like well I here for C__ and this isn't too much.. sure I'll pick it up, everyone like rings right? Then I get home and C__ say "well, I don't know if she'll like it.. but I do! Where's mine? I just wanted to be like, "Here, take it. It's burring a hole in me tke it, take it. But I was good I resisted. O' that and she saw the Necklace while cleaning (damm her OCD cleaning habbits) so I made her think I took it back.. I'm evil. But it's for here own good, she needs a good suprise.

By far a much more worthy set of gifts than what we had to give before.. Not counting C__'s gifts, I only spent about $500.

So that's half of Christmas out of the way.. O' yeah and we got tickets to George Strait.. This will be my first concert.. ever.. I hope it doesn't end up sucking. But I can't see someone like George Stait not being good in concert either, so I'm not to worried about it.
I don't know where the seats are MIL (Mom In-law) gotthem for us.

So now it's back out to walk the building for another two hour today alone.. Not recomended with hangover..

A.M.

2004-12-16T10:01:00.000-08:00

That's right kids it's 6:30 again.. Why are all of you so sleepy?

I think P-R's right we could change the name to fighting with the wife’s or something.. it would work just the same..

Note to self:
Never under any circumstances tell C__ sed item we are fighting about is a dumb reason to be fighting. It will only worsens the situation as a whole.

Today I completed my "Free" Circle K coffee cup set, with purchase of re-fill
(.79 cents).
See the way I see it..
If they're goanna charge me for just a re-fill on a brand new mug.. who am I to stop them?
So lets see now I have the Blue, Red, Yellow, and Brown.
Does that make me a bad person?

So now I'm all up on French roast, real cream, and equal, sorry Murphy no Coffee Mate today.. not that I even know if you read this.. do you?

Which would be why I'm able to post at 6:30am

Man today's even more of a party day than yesterday around here..

People are all happy and cheery.. except that guy..
Everyone I see has a huge platter of food coming through the door. What's funny is all the guy have already made platter and crock pot full of meatball or wings.
Now all the women coming in that have something to bring, they all took the time to make something.. like a lady just walk by, she was carrying homemade jalapeno poppers.. they looked awesome. They were a jalapeno cut in half with what looked like monetary cheese.. and here's the part that tells me there home made.. she wrapped each one with a piece of bacon.. Mmmm bacon, I think that's it's own food group. Or at least it should be.

Damm holiday cheer it's goanna kill me.. or put me back up at 300lbs.. Someone just dropped off donuts again.. Krispy Kreme, the bain of my existence. Why O' why do you torment me with you Light glazed goodness?
Bump bump bump another one bites the dust... and another one gone.. well that's all I gotta stop at two or I think I'll die of a sugar/ caffeine over dose.

Great new site

2004-12-15T13:52:00.000-08:00

A buddy of mine showed me this great new flash cartoon site:

www.illwillpress.com

Click on comics then click on any of the comics that you think you might like.
My personal favorites are the 'rants' and jiggly butt.

Hungry? Grab Anything..

2004-12-15T11:02:00.000-08:00

I starving... to... death... ahhh...(dead)

Do you ever get so hungry you start smelling foods that don't exist?

I swear to God I keep smelling hamburgers on a grill. But I know for a fact there aren't any burgers being cooked around here for a good half mile (there's MCD's down the road a ways). But it's to the point where I'm so hungry that is all that occupies my mind. Last night I had boneless Buffalo wings from the Fry's Deli. I think I'm addicted to them, I could eat them every day all day.

I really want to order a pizza. But I just can't bring myself to do it since I'm back here all alone. And am afraid if left with a whole pizza... well I would eat it all.

Christmas lights... Done.
Yesterday braving all odd agents me I finished the Christmas lights on our two story house.. Anyone know how you hang lights on a house that you don't have a ladder tall enough to reach the roof with?
Please let me share..
First take a tall ladder and climb you ass onto the garage roof (now the fun starts) take another ladder and put it at the peak of the garage. Not climb onto the tallest area of the roof. Notice how much more drastic the pitch is on the top, yeah it didn't look that steep from the ground did it. So now that you're on the roof top. Take the lights the staple gun and you ass and scoot to the edge of the roof on you stomach. Ok now reach over the edge and hold the sting of lights in one hand and the staple gun in the other, careful not to roll off now.. Ok
Thank god your wearing that leather belt that seems to grip the roof tiles. Lets not forget the gale force winds blowing across the rooftops.

But I did it, I hung the lights with about the top third of my body hanging over the edge of my house.

I don't know where I was going with all this...
Hey but thanks for coming along for the ride, maybe I'll get some direction tomorrow. I hope.

(Still hungry)

My ADD is geting worse!

2004-12-14T11:26:00.000-08:00

So right now at work I have a raging case of A.D.D.

I can't stay focused for the life of me. It's like every three seconds I have to look around the room and then back to the monitor. What's strange is that I have no coffee in me at all right now either. It would be understandable if I had my pot of coffee in me and was all strung out on caffeine, but this is just off. I got sleep but not too much. I just don't know what’s up.

Mmm Krispy Kreme donuts.....
Someone just dropped off a box here.

O' sprinkles. That makes it a health food if I remember correctly.

Anyone else out there notice that when you eat a Kripy Kreme donut you never remember eating it.. Sure you get that sweet rush of sugar and you teeth feel all coated with it but it's always like.. Well I could have another one, that one was gone so fast..

New wedding craze,
Krispy Kreme wedding cakes.
No joke the take dozens and dozens of donuts and stack em high then frost the whole thing with drizzled donut glaze and dress it with roses or whatever flowers you want. Then there you have it your vary own mound of heart failure.
I would probably be pretty dam good, but it's not like you can make a donut cake look elegant or sophisticated.
But then again has anyone ever seen the "fake cakes” what they do is take a hollow plastic pre formed cylinder and decorate the outside of it with frosting and all the trimming then serve sheet cake as the real thing.. Maybe something like that would work.
Wow all that came from seeing.. and having.. donuts.

Yesterday C__ and I got back to "normal"
We went to Pier One and got some candles and a bowl to serve some dessert out of on Christmas Jr.
Then it was over the Frame shop. We didn't intend to buy anything when we went in.. but we all know how that goes. Don't go in unless you prepared to buy. C__ had bought these pictures of flowers like six month ago and was still waiting to frame them. There not like that fue fue water colors or oils that people get of flowers.. they were vary simple photos of flowers on a simple background.. one was a pink and purple flower on a piece of Burch bark, stuff like that.
Anyway we went in and after about forty minutes of debate as to when we were goanna "have the money to do this" I convinced her that now was as good a time as any other. So we picked up our three frames at 50% off (like you could pass that up anyway) and another big frame that will go above the TV for a mere $70. Not bad all thing considered.

Then it was off to the house, only a small 50 minutes away. Sometimes I don't like living so far out due to the drive. But most the time it's nice. We don't get huge amounts of traffic whizzing by at 65mph and we don't get all the other dirt and grime that come with living in the city. Also we get to see allot more stars than most the people in the city boundaries. we see all the lights in the distance but it all fades in time to give us a great view most nights. I guess last night was a meteor shower or something. We saw about three or four shooting stars while out on our run. Last night it felt good to get out and run. The air was crisp and clean, that and last night.. I ran, god it felt good to run.
See normally when C__ and I go out for a run, we go her pace. Not mine. Her pace is about the same as me going a little faster than walking fast but sill not quite a comfortable jog... So I went my speed witch works out to be about a six and a half maybe seven-minute mile.
Then it was time to lift, since I lift in my garage there are few excuses good enough to not lift. Last night I mixed it up in the order of witch I do the work out and again it kicked my as$, it's been a long time since lifting actually did something for me.

God love the acoustics in this place.

Today is the free employee dinner. We got free turkey and stuffing along with mashed potatoes and pie.
But the cool thing is there's a string quartet down in the cafeteria playing. Now I'm not one to tune in the symphony on the radio or anything, but it's kindda nice sitting back listing to them play down the hall... This place is so inhuman and cold all the time it's nice to hear that bit of creative expression coming down the hall.

I hope all of you have wonderful days.

Bored at work.. What a surprise!

2004-12-13T10:51:00.000-08:00

So I'm just chillin' in the tin box we affectionately call the Guard shack. I've already made countless rounds through the blogs and even looked at a few more. I set up a halo account then decided no to use it. I've read all my E-mails and even called P-Riddy. It seams that while he's at work.. he's actually working and can't just BS like me. That's right Mr. Fancy Pants. I just sit back and get paid. Yes it's fun sometimes but I think I'm going off the deep end, and soon. I feel Crazy knocking on my door and I'm contemplating letting him in for tea. I don't even drink tea..

This it what happens when you leave me alone for hours at a time.

I got another free coffee mug today thanks to the lack of attention paid by both the guy ringing me up and myself. He charged the re-fill price of .79 cents. O well I wont worry to much about it.

A little touch of truth..

C__ and I fought last night.
Again.
She got all mad and told me it was all my fault.
Again.
She told me she doesn't have to stay.
Again.
That nothing I could do would make things better.
Again.
I can't say it wasn't part my fault because it took both of use to fight. See if you just yell and no one's around then you just look crazy.

C__ has a problem with holding grudges.
You'll think she got over something then bam it's back and now it just on a list along with all the new stuff.

I have a problem talking. (Fancy that)
Normally it just turns into a huge ball of nothing plugging my throat.

The way love feels changes I know.
And so does the way people are together.
I don't know..
Stuff’s just weird between us right now.

I know we'll get around whatever this thing is. It just might take a little time.

Wish me luck.

Not to worry I'll keep writing like always.
Like you were worried..

O well I just had to get that out of me.. I feel better now.
Hey..
P-Riddy..
V...
Thanks

V... you always got me thinkin'

2004-12-12T06:53:00.000-08:00

A quick question to another young adult: do you sometimes still feel like you're just playing grown up? Like you're playing house with C and pretending to be grown up at work.
Vortexia

Aaahhh Playing grown up...

Definitely, yes. I have moments of sheer uncontrollable childish outbursts where I refuse to acknowledge being grown up and having any adult life. I'll just sit there like.. I remember a time when my Bi-weekly paycheck was about two to three hundred dollars at most and I would just sat back and think "how could I ever need more?"

Now it's about $1000.00 just for the mortgage alone..

First time I really felt as if I was playing grown up would have to be the day we got married. Being engaged is all well and good but there's a cretin amount of young love and emotion that comes with that but when you get married that’s a big kid thing to do.. only grown up's get married.
Then there was buying a house.. no longer renting an apartment. I sat down and said yes I would like to make a thirty-year commitment to not only you but also this house that we will make a home.

One of the best I can remember would have to be sleeping in the "Master bedroom" in our house. For about the first week it just felt wrong... We would just say to each other. This is where the grown-up's sleep, kids are down the hall..

It's weird how things hit you in waves.. We don't always realize all that we have accomplished in our lives with each other or how grown up we really are.. But I think that's ok too. See when you say grown up that means a cretin frame of mind.. One that is cut and dry, one that feels trapped and tied to responsibility. I think that's were we go wrong. People shouldn’t worry about growing up, that just happens no matter what you say or do, It's all about how you choose to move to the next step in life.
Dose the next step mean you can't eat Capt. Crunch any more?
No.
Does it mean you can watch old re-runs of Scooby Doo?
Hell no.
Being a grown up just means you know when the bills are due, and have bigger toys than the kid down the block.

As far as the whole grown up thing at work..
Well that's a little more tricky. See my position itself harbors some responsibility but for the most part it's all just passing the time in the "most effective manner." That and when you work in a building that does aerospace and communication manufacturing.. well that's a primarily male dominated job market. So it's kinda like a big boy club all the time. We joke and goof around with everyone, tell silly stories.. Things like that. I don't have the opportunity to do the whole corner office on the op floor thing.. At least not at the present moment.
That and almost everyone on this shift is relatively young, except about two old guys. They're all angry at life and everyone whole resides in "their" area. But then again if I was a security guard for like fifteen years... I think I'd be a little bitter too.

V, I just wanted to say thanks,
I would like to give you the "Most involved reader" award.
You are the only person.. ever.. that has actually asked something from D Rant. Everyone else just lets me go out of control and without direction. It's kindda nice to actually have something to write about you know someone out the would like to know about.

Any time you ever need some input or help.. Just drop a line.

In other news..
This weekend was... odd.
Yeah that's a good way to sum it up.
Thursday was my Friday as usual. Friday mourning I rolled out of bed around nine to head over to the store. I had a mission of the day. I was out to shampoo the rugs..
All 2300 square feet..
Now I know what you're thinking.. Just pay someone right.. Well that's just not how I do, see I like to know, for sure that the stuff gets done right. That and it's not like I had a bunch of other things going on that mourning. So I rented the shampooer, it was only 25 buck for a 24-hour retail, along with the shampoo also oddly enough was 24 bucks.. O' well that's still only $50 total. I was a shampooing mad man. I got the thing back to the store a mere two and a half hours after I rented it. The women behind the counter asked me if something was wrong with the thing.. I said, "Nope, I'm all done that's all." She looked at me like.. Did you even use this thing? See I had already cleared all the floors off and vacuumed before going to get the cleaner so I got it done in record time.

Friday Night...
Ding Ding Ding..

In this corner weighing in at 195 lbs we have the man the myth the ledged.
...
D Rrrrrant Master

And in this corer weighing in at a slimming 1.. lbs hailing from small town Oklahoma.
...
C___.

Shake hands watch the low blows and rabbit punches.

Lets have a good clean fight.

So we got into it for a little while on the way to P-Riddys..
See I said I'd help my pop's on Saturday mourning or afternoon. He needed to get some furniture loaded up and since he can't really do that I had to help. This wasn't her issue. It was the fact that it was going to my sisters’ place and she didn't get why she just couldn't come load it or have her husband load it..
Well' lets see.
My sister is constantly occupied with her kids they're almost 2 and about four months old.
My brother in-law is about as useful as a three-legged dog at a racetrack. Now if you need someone that can sit and read a dry ass peace of law.. He’s your guy but other than that, just let him sit in the back and shut up.

So I said I'd help, it would just be simpler for all parties.
Then on the way home from work she sprung on me that she was working Saturday mourning at 8am. Now we were going to P-Riddys, at six at night.. It takes about an hour and a half to get there and then the same to get home.
So she throws out the good ol' "Just go without me." Instant red flag. See when something like that is said to me I instinctively go to.. "Right, I go, you get mad then we fight." Not that we weren’t fighting bad enough already.
That and I have Friday off.. we have Saturday off together. So I didn't want to leave her at home on the night we have to really do something as a couple.

We got back home at about 1:30 am and we were so mad I slept on the couch. She got up the next mourning and got ready then left without a word being said. That always kills me, but I was playing the same game.
She called me about then minutes after leavening with the "I don't want today to be like this" line. But I didn't back down. I wasn't in the wrong here.. was I?

By the time we met back up at home in the afternoon there was enough time to cool off on both sides. It's all "better" now. But every time we fight like this it just closes me off to her points of view a little more.

And now it's Sunday..
I'm at work.. I forgot my cell phone this mourning so I can call no one. I've made the rounds.. Must say I almost fell out of my chair thanks to Murphy.

Inspiration.. Via V

2004-12-09T09:00:00.000-08:00

Question: What are your daily little blessings? The things that catch you off guard and make you smile?

V,
I had to pull this over to my blog to actually write you an answer worthy of reading. See when I comment on something on a sight it's just a comment.. I don't feel just a comment is good enough for this particular question.

That and I can only put 1000 characters in one comment.

Blessings, the short answer:
Let get the simple ones out of the way..
My health, my friends, my wife, family, and house.

Blessings, a little more:
I have many blessings in my life, ones I don't stop to think of quite near often enough.

Some are small
Like that way C__ look at me that means I love you.

Of how we sit down still and watch cartoons sometimes. Never too old, remember that.

Carpet picnics. This is when all else is failing you take you dinner to the middle of the living room throw down a blanket and have some dinner with the one who make everything seem right.

The coffee that get me going almost every day. Thank God for coffee.

The fact that I get to go home to a house that's all shinny and brand new.

Even though my dogs do end to eat allot of my things.. They too are a blessing. Always willing to give unconditional love.

It may be silly to say but I think that me blogging is a blessing.. I have this outlet that all of one other person in the world that knows me, knows about.
Plus I know he ain't talkin' to anyone about it. It's my release, my honest place, where the only judgments that matter are really my own.

Bread.

Fridays.

The things that catch you off guard and make you smile?

A "Zen" moment at work. These are the time were everything gust seems to fade away and all that is left is you and the air.

C__ talking in her sleep. It really makes sense but whenever she rolls over and mutters out something about how there's a "hair crawling on my face." Or "No more purple mustard." All I can do is smile. That and she gets the most content look on her face and smiles back at me (eyes still closed) every time.

My pups. My Challula (the Lab only 65lbs) loves to lay on the back of the couch like a cat. Always a good time. That's aside from the times when she forgets her size and tries her hardest to squirm in-between C__ and me in the middle of the night. Not to discredit Sissy (Boarder Collie) she has her moments too, when she want some attention she'll paw at you so soft, just enough to get your attention as if to say, "Hey, hey.. Pet me."

Succeeding.

Someone saying good mourning to me before I say it to them.
Rarely does this happen in this place, I always great people with a smile and good mourning. But only by obligation do they respond. I did a "study" one day and said good mourning to no one.. Hence I spoke to no one that day.

I damm good meal. You know the kind were when the first bite hits you lips you know your goanna need to be rolled out.

See there are many thing in my life I consider blessings or things to smile about.. These are only a few, just a fraction of what make my life the way it is. I may gripe sometime about the way things are going at the present moment but by no means do I ever forget what things could be and are for many people everyday.

So thanks V.

As far as the day goes..
It's my Friday, Going to Subway for lunch with P-Riddy, and got a weekend of drinken planned.

Boredom

2004-12-09T08:47:00.000-08:00

Kinnda me.
.

Much to be done says I

2004-12-08T08:37:00.000-08:00

Over the course of the next few month or month I need to become a network guru. I will live, eat, and sleep server 2003. Not to mention I need to be right on with all our company and government standards for protocol with secret and top secret areas.

Today I have to finish my "P.C." (Personal commitment) it's retarded really. You set out goal that are easily attainable and when you succeed they pat you on the back and say good job. But actually filing out the forms for the P.C. is what I still have to do. See some jackass designed the thing and not only does it not flow as a document, but it also blows in instructing you what to do and in what order. It's just a bunch of open fields with a single word above it.

Well I think it's the bracelet on a two to one vote from the masses. But, since only three people helped.. is that really the "masses” I think not. So a big thanks you to Vortexia, Cav, and Greg for helping me with the decision.

Nothing real big is going on right now. We have no money in the bank right now.. until Friday AKA payday. So there's no going anywhere that isn't a necessity. I did work out last night. It felt good, I went two miles around our neighbor hood and then lifted for about an hour. See my big problem isn’t the action of working out. It the first ten seconds of it when everything has to "wind up" and get moving.

Info leak #1
It's been "rumored" that one gift for the holiday season is a kitchen aid mixer. This may be odd to some of you but to me it's like the Holy Grail of kitchen appliances. Now I will become a bread-making monster. It'll be like, what you want a loaf of white bread? Bam! White bread. O' jalapeno cheese bread you say? Bang! There it is. So I'm all pumped to get my new kitchen toy since I will be getting nothing from my wife this Christmas.. it's cool tho we already talked about it when we got the "Big TV."

Info leak #2
Another underground source says I'll be getting a coffee maker too. Well he didn't say, "You're getting a coffee maker" it was more like "if I were you and wanted a coffee maker.. I would hold out until after charismas for that purchase." Apparently it's the new kind that brews out one cup ate a time so you don't have to waste a whole pot.. That means starbucks any time I want that means no need to stop every mourning and paying 4 bucks a cup, and it means caffeine any time... at the push of a button.

With all this coffee and bread making abilities I'll be a force to be reckoned with. You just wait. I'll be on the food network in no time.

Well it's off to do my P.C. God this sucks.

It's 12:24 and the PC is finally done. Holy momma gezums that blew.
But not to worry nothing happened in the middle anyway. Nothing ever does..
O well once more around the blogs and then back to my online network training.

Count is 2 to 0

2004-12-07T10:19:00.000-08:00

Current tally
Bracelet Vs. Necklace count is Two 2 to 0
bracelet.

Check out the links and help me decide on what to get the wiffie

Necklace or the bracelet.

Hello Shadow

2004-12-07T09:34:00.000-08:00

I'm in the main security office today and that means.. The boss sits right next to me just about every minute of the day. So there will be no big post today.

But I'll write for as long as I can,
I found out today that I can sign up for online classes and the Corp will pay for them as long as I can get it approved my the dread Big-E. He see all and approves all things money in our department. So here's hopen' he says yes. See it all depends on who much money is left in our budget for the rest of the fiscal year. All though it's only $152.00 for one year, as many classes as I can take, he'll still look at it like, "well I don't know, the last guy we did this for didn't even complete one." See that's what he does, he'll look at what happens most times and disregard your request based on someone else's mistakes.

Here's the "plan"
I want to take courses in network security, thus opening more doors here at this communications giant. See I got into talk with a guy in the Audio Visual department and he said.

First:
"Man I would love to know Maya"
Okay this animation software has been out and become a corporate standard for animation. Not knowing it is like playing baseball with a golf club. How is it I know it and you don't yet you have the 65k a year job?

Second:
"They haven't fired anyone around here in two years."
Okay this sounds promising. They don't do random firings and have a dependable and functional staff.

Third:
"They haven't Hired any one either."
Well that's all I need to hear about that, my chances of gaining access to the world on animation and graphic design here is dead... Along with everyplace else I look.

But whatever, some dreams.. Just stay dreams.

Gotta go boss is back for meeting.

Ho Ho... ehh whatever

2004-12-06T06:37:00.000-08:00

Over the weekend we got all Christmas ready with a real tree and like 3,500 light to hang. And that's all well and good but it was rainy all weekend after I was all ready to get started on the outside. Now I'm all for Christmas don't get me wrong but it was like the tree was all her and the stuff inside was all her.. All I wanted to do was hand the light on the outside.. But I don't have a ladder tall enough to get to the roof of the second floor so I can't run lights up there even if I wanted to.. Luckily I got down off the roof before falling off. See down here we use only the tera cotta roof tiles on our houses. They make for great insulation and look nice too, but they brake easy as hell, you can just be walking on them and crack a tile. So I wait, lights in the garage and me in the house all done up (Martha Stewart would be proud) for the rain to stop and the ground to dry, then it's back up to the roof of death for round two. Jeez the things you'll do to keep with the status quo.

Sunday was it's own adventure in holiday cheer.
I had to work same as always but yesterday was spent training someone, yet again on walking the building. Now I wouldn't mind if I was training someone new every time for a few weeks but this has been the same guy for like a month. Now that's four of an eight hour day spent walking around the same path "teaching" this guy to do the same in a hap hazard fallow the leader game.

*Side Note*
Background on me...
From the time I was seventeen to the time I was twenty-one I worked with and taught kids. I started working in an after school program running activities, moved to pre-school when I turned eighteen and graduated high school. Actually taught three and four year old children for two years then moved up to running my vary own after school program of eighty plus kid average and a staff of nine by the ripe old age of twenty one.
Que 9/11...
Market falls no one can afford to keep paying an extra $200 a month to send their kids to an after school program.
This equal budget cut backs.
I loose my school, my staff and my job.
*End Side Note*

So this experience of working with children gave me unbelievable powers of dealing with people. I think that's way they keep sticking me with this guy and training him.. Even tough I still don't "know" the walk myself. Who knows? Maybe he'll get it this week.

After finishing with work it was of to the folks house and up into the dark dusty crowded attic to retrieve all their Christmas cheer. Now I'm not sure about your parents but when the holidays roll around their house looks like a craft fair threw up all over after a wild party. It's all a thousand ornaments and light and nick knacks. I sh.. you not I pulled down over thirty boxes six Rubbermaid containers and five bags of stuff all barring the X-Mass brand. Some of which actually said "Nick Knacks" on them. Now most people think O' well he just walked around and brought the boxes down. Right? Uuumm no the standard "attic" here in AZ is the space over the garage in the rafters. It's no more than four feet tall in the center and tapers down to about six inches in both directions. Not to mention it's about twenty-five feet long. O' Joy . I say, "Where's the X-Mass stuff at?" Dad comes back with, "All down the side. So that means theres about twenty feet of Christmas to haul down.
An hour passes of me, up there, moving boxes to get to boxes and handing down boxes. My knees kill from kneeling on the corners of 2x4's for an hour, but we must do it for the greater good O' Christmas.. Must.. Spread.. Christmas.. Cheer..

But on the way home I stopped and picked up Panda for dinner.
Mmmm Panda good. We always get the orange chicken and chow mien. I think I could live off that stuff. We watched the Grinch when I got home. It was on ABC or something. It was the new one with Jim Carry I'm not all for the new one. I mean yeah it give a little more to the story line and plot, but I'm partial to the old classics.
Other than that it was off to bed and sleep. Now it's at work and starring out at the wet that is still around from the last three days of rain.
So this year I will be getting the wife another piece of the tree stone two tone set from Helzberg I just can't decide on if it should be the Necklace or the bracelet. Maybe you lovely lady reader out there can lend a hand. Go to the links.. Evaluate... Drop a line.

Rounds

2004-12-02T10:15:00.000-08:00

Well I had enough time to make the "rounds" before it's time to go.. I'll keep writing for as long as I can until it's time to get back in the truck and drive. See today is a "Patrol Day" for me, which means I'm stuck in a S-10 for six of my eight hours. Now I could sit in my own S-10 for that long, it's fit to me and I fit in it. You know what I mean where the sea just hugs your ass and you can sit into "your spot." Or maybe I'm just in my truck too much to actually have a spot like that. But anyway back to the work S-10. It's a 2001 so it's a few (7) years newer than mine but it's so beat from being used by twenty different people every day and being driven almost 24 hours a day. The seat witch used to be designed to give back support and help promote correct posture now sags far into the seat back and creates the most horrible hunched over Igor looking pose. So when it does come time to get out of the truck you stand up and pop goes the spine in about three places so as to restore you to be able to walk upright. Once again it's a S-10 so it's not a car with a smooth ride.. nor is it a truck with quality suspension or power. It just puts along..
So if ya'll wonder where I am due to the fact that I'm always online and looking at blogs. Well I'm stuck in a tuna can idling around a parking lot where nothing happens.. ever.

On a home note the wife and I had a real good one last night.. She slept downstairs on the couch and I didn't drift off until well after midnight only to get up at 4 and head to work.. It was a dumb fight from my standpoint, but she was convinced it was the "last straw." See she's been wanting to go and get light and a tree for about three days now. Well yesterday was the first day I put the "Free Money" into the account so prior to that we didn't have the means to go and get the sh.. stuff. But yesterday we did. Also yesterday after work I help my dad get a fake tree (she needs a real one) see my dad recently developed all kinds of joint and back problems in the last two months not just little stuff. His daily doses of med go Perkeset/Valume/and whatever is one step up from Ibuprofen. He can lift around 15lb at most so I have to help allot right now. So we got a tree I dropped him a PT went to deposit the check, get emissions done pick up dad from PT drive on hour home and about six pm I was there. So I wasn't in the mood to go out of the house anymore since it’s a good hour to anywhere she would want to go. Long story short she couldn't get why I didn't want to go back out. She said it was because I'll bend over backwards for my folks and won't even go out with her.. Dmmit I was tired of driving I had enough. But when I went to leave this mourning she said she was sorry I said I was sorry and all is back to the norm. On the way to work I stopped to get coffee mmm coffee.

Well back to the Supper Truck..

Bickering..

2004-11-30T10:20:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was spent bickering. Her with me and me back at her. Some days are like that. I thought it was going to be a great evening. We got "free money." See we got a check back from the Mortgage company we go through for about $800.00. Sweet! Now that can potentially do allot of things. Things like buy clothes for the winter or go to the money market account until it's "needed." But, for the first time yesterday I found myself being the responsible one. C__ said "Hey I can buy allot of clothes with 800 bucks." And I said, "Yeah but we need to fix your trucks brakes and a few other things too." Obviously not the response she was looking for because she honest to god stomped her feet and said "Don't talk to me, I need new clothes." Now to myself I thought. Girl if you "need" 800 bucks worth of new clothing... you should be naked allot more.

So we reached an agreement. I'll get the front brakes checked and the rears replaced, along with having to be the person that sits there all day on my day off. She has yet to deal with and repair necessary on a vehicle she has owned. It's always me, and I'm always the bad guy. I told her, "I'm sorry I don't want you flying off the side of the road. So yes I'm going to get this done. You can use the rest to buy whatever you want." This seemed to be an acceptable proposition. Especially since I think the stuff I want done is only going to be about $300 plus tax. So we "resolved" that whole issue and then the rest of the night was spent bickering back and forth about dumb stuff... Honestly I can't even remember what about. I can just remember saying Jesus Christ I'm not attacking you I'm just talking about what you want for dinner..

Yeah, we have crappy problems, it's not like she's a crack addict and I cheat on her with her best friend and her mom, we're not all Jerry Springer, but hey they're our problems and we'll deal with each one.. one at a time.

Other than that whole mess...
We spent the night on the couch watching TV and eating chicken soup. That part was good. Last night was cold as hell... No wait a minute that doesn't work.. Hell isn’t cold. Last night was cold as the North Pole.. Sure that works. Yeah, I'm sure you're thinkin' D it's the desert how cold can it get? Well how about 33 for the night time low. Yeah that's one degree away from freezing water, Sunny and hot all the time my ass. O' and I forgot to mention.. My super S-10 has no heat. Aahhh it gets better by the day. So that doubles as my excuse for getting coffee in the mourning on the way to work. I mean how else do you expect me to stay warm? Right? Other than that... I feel like I'm going out of my mind just a little bit at a time. Any one wanna come?

Half-Life 2

2004-11-29T17:29:00.000-08:00

Half-Life 2

Hell ya baby! The game we have all been waiting for has been out now for a week, and let me tell you it has been a tear shedding, late night playing, wrist cramping experiance. For those of you who are wondering,"Could it possibly live up to the hype?", yes it does and much more. It makes DoomIII look like sesame street, and puts halo2 to shame.

And it was a weekend... and it was good

2004-11-28T06:40:00.000-08:00

Yes it's Sunday and yes the weekend doesn't "end" until Monday for most people anyway..
Well for the past six months I haven't had any weekend to call my own and share with my wife. So I got Friday Saturday off and it was great. We hung out and spent time together. We ate dam near all the leftovers from thanksgiving. All thou there is still a half a turkey in the freezer. But you can only eat so much before you feel to sick to carry on.
So lets recap...

Thursday...

Turkey day,
That's right folks had it all from Turkey to tators. We had stuffing and pie. There was even this thing my wiffe made called a trifle. It was like a pumpkin pie without the crust and a coffee cake in its place. Mmmm good.
The turkey was huge, 22lbs there was five of us and we didn't even dent the dam thing. I still put half of it in he freezer and the other third of it in the fridge. We had an apple pie, it didn't even get cut into.
We had one of my friends from work come over with his wife. They're new to the valley and had no family to spend the day with, I felt bad, everyone needs to be with someone on days like that, so I asked them over and that accepted. They where really nice too. His wife is 25 and he's 23, they just came from So Cal and he just finished his tour overseas. The day was just your standard holiday, eat too much, let the sick feeling were off, eat a little more. I had enough time to get drunk... sober... and drunk. Nothing like the holidays

Friday (AKA Thanksgiving Jr.)
We slept in.. all the way until 10:00. That's amazing due to the fact that for the last six months if I was off she was on and vice versa. So we slept.. Then it was time to get up and get ready for another round of Thanksgiving. See the day before was with my mother in-law. Friday was with my "Father in-law" his girlfriend and my parents (Maybe some other time I'll go into detail about my wifes family). We had more turkey and stuffing, more trifle, and the apple pie didn't get touched. Except this time C__ (Wife=C__ from this day forth) made turkey potpie. Mmmm good. She makes it from scratch, even the cream sauce that it all goes into. It was another night of fun, frolic, and food. Not to mention another 12pack down the hatch.. The last to that "capped me off" were dedicated to Smart.

Saturday, O' yeah that's right Saturday,
We did nothing... well we did something... but we didn't leave the house anyway.
We spent all day on the couch watching cheese movies on TBS and AMC, we fooled around on the couch, witch was too funny.. it made me feel like we were just starting again.. we haven fooled around in a long time. Usually it's just like yep it's time, we meet up in the middle to take care off business and then it's back to our corners, her cooking or watching law and order reruns, and me playing a game or out talking with a neighbor. But yesterday was different.. we kissed and touched, there was more than just the status quow..

Then about 4pm she fell asleep on the couch and I sat in front of it playing the PS2 to pass the time.. I don't know what it was but I just had to look at her every once in a while.. just watching her sleep.. I realized I don't do that enough.

Sunday,
So now it's back to the grindstone and I'm here at work. With all the food and drink I had in the last three days.. I need to go home and work out for five hours, but I'll probably stop at my usual two hours and find another way to work the rest off. Not to worry I have a few ideas.

I hope that all of you that had Turkey Day this weekend, it was a good one. To all my friends across the boarders. I hope you had a great weekend just the same.

Turkey day eve..

2004-11-24T11:26:00.000-08:00

It was Turkey day eve and all through the house, not a creature was stirring.. not even a mouse. The stuffing was done with love and much care, with hope that Turkey Day would soon be there. The dogs were nestled all snug in our bed, with visions of rawhide danced in their heads.
And mamma in her nightly and I wear no cape, had just settle in to watch a TV full of crap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I tripped over a shoe while going to see what was the matter. Away to the window I flew like a flash, I broke the dam shutter. And what the hell is a sash? The moon on the breast (I said breast, and didn't mean boob) of the new-fallen snow Gave the luster of mid-day to objects below, when to my wondering eyes what should appear? But a miniature cornucopia and eight tiny pigs. With the little brown driver so lively and jerky, I knew right that moment it must be St. Turkey.

More rapid than geo metros his course they came. He gobbled and shouted, each pig had a name. "On, Porgy, on Pudgy, Jumbo and Hocks! On, Pinky! On, Dinky! On, Dwayne and Bill! (Don't know what was up with those two) To the top of the porch! To the top of the wall! Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all! "To the top of the porch! To the top of the wall! Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly, when they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky. So up to the housetop the coursers they flew, with the sleigh full of rolls, and St. Turkey too. And then, in a twinkling, I heard stumbling and bumbling of pig feet on the roof. As I drew in my hand, and was turning around, Down the drier exhaust St. Turkey came with a bound He was dressed all in feathers, from his head to his foot, And his clothes were all tarnished with lint and something that look like soot.

A bundle of sweet potatoes he had slung over his back, he looked like a door to door salesman opening his pack. He had a broad face and little beer belly, that shook when he jumped like a bowlful of jelly.
He was chubby and plump a right jolly Turkey, and I laughed when I saw his movement so quirky. With a twist of a feather and a nod of his head, soon I realized I had nothing to dread.
He filled the gravy boat and crok-pot and turned with a jerk, laying a feather on his beak and giving a nod, back up the drier exhaust he rose. He jump on top of his cornucopia and gave his pig team a whistle, and away they al flew like some kind of missile.

But I heard him yell back, as he flew out of sight,

"Happy Turkey Day to all, and to all a good-night."

This story was brought to you by the letters W-H-Y the word boredom and the number 69.

That came totally out of left field, I'm so sorry. But it got in my head and I had to share. Today was good though, I got to work a little.. Send out a million E-Mails asking for area info and get about six back. Had some decent coffee and even got to joke around with a few people in the process. We have a big ol 22 lb turkey to make.. there's 5 of us. I think we'll have a little left over. That and the wiffie got all cooking happy like, "I'm making apple pie, and turkey, stuffing, sweet mashed potatoes, trifle, deviled eggs, and I know a few more things but I can't recall what they are right now. So we have enough food to feed a small village just waiting to be cooked. I work tomorrow, but it's ok.. I get off at 2 and get home around 2:40, so that's not bad. O and the other thing is I'll make double time.. and a half. That's my normal pay plus my normal pay plus half normal pay. Sweet.
Other than that nothing new and exciting is going on. It's all go home clean a little, eat a little work out a little.

And it's 1:30

2004-11-23T13:21:00.000-08:00

Today got away from me. I was busy re revising the schedule yet again.. he will never be happy with the damm thing. Also along with the scheduling I'm supposed to start updating all the point of contact for all of our areas that are alarmed i.e. the whole freaken building only about sixty areas.

Gotta go home now... I'll write up tomorrow I promise.
I'm a slacker, sorry to all of you.

Dear Mr. Fast Food Man

2004-11-22T09:51:00.000-08:00

Dear Mr. Fast Food Man,

I writing you in light of resent statements made by one Mr. Rock.

Who was nice enough to bring to my attention that I am not the only person you feel doesn't need the exact food requested by sed individual..
Now I don't mind getting surprised by things like.. New cars or money, maybe even the occasional new movie or game to preoccupy my time. But what I don't like is the surprise I get from ordering a certain type of food and or drink and upon receiving sed item find out you changed my mind for me. Now If I wanted something different, the whole scenario would have went something like this. Uuummm, no I don't want that I'll take Blah blah instead. Thank you. Or even, well what's good give me one of those, thanks.

Now I know what you're thinking,
We never get the orders wrong. Remember it's the customer is always right. Well I will share a for instance with you...

Lets just say.. I walk into a Quizno's.. hypothetically.
Now well pretend I say, "I want a Smokey Bacon Chicken Sandwich, a Ranch hand Chicken salad and a regular Turkey sandwich.
The person I placed this order with gives the OK nod and I proceed to move forward with my order and ask for soup also wile paying fro sed items. Now because I wasn't looking at the sandwich preparation expert he I suppose the whole thing is my fault. But when I get home to enjoy my perches of O' say $23.00 worth of "fast food" I find...

1 regular Turkey sandwich. (Perfect)
1 Bacon and Chicken sandwich (Now with no Bacon, now what is the point in that)
1 Ranch Hand Chicken Salad (Now a Roast Beef and B.B.Q. sauce with cheddar cheese)
But not to worry they got all aces on the soup itself (with the exception of the fact that it had now cornbread muffins to go along with it)

This whole situation perplexes me. Please note that I cannot "Just run back" due to the fact that you location is 45+ minutes away from my house. So please do note ask me to do so.
This is all just hypothetical now, so don't worry no one could screw up that badly.. Or could they?

Bottom line is.
I'm sure that in the 23 years of my life I have been able to pin down what I would like to eat and when I would like to eat it.

Now one to the day/Weekend,
The weekend was all normal and boring. It was full of work and home. We went over to the neighbors for a few hours on Saturday night, but I had to bail around 11:30 so I could get some kind of rest before I had to get up for work (4:00am). But other than that.. This weekend was a big fat goose egg of a good time.

On a side note I made my killer enchiladas. I make it with a Baja sauce (AKA Green Chile sauce and sour cream reduced to a thick state). Then it's all layers of corn tortillas, cheese, ground turkey seasoned in chili pepper and garlic salt, and topped with the Baja sauce and chipotle chillies in adobo sauce. Bake at 450 for 45 minutes and done.

Today has been busy in sperts of about fifteen minutes or so. So it's just enough to make it damm near impossible to write anything.
On a side note.. I'm starving’ not just regular hungry but all out starving. It's to that point were every ten seconds it feels like you stomach is rolling over.. I have a can of tuna.. but you can only eat that so many rime in a row before you feel like all you're doing is turning into a cat.

I rained today.. this mourning, it was a good rain too. It had all the qualities of a good rain, it was hard but not pelting down, it was cool but not freezing cold, and it was just enough to wash away all that junk in the roads and on the sidewalks.
Funny thing about here and the rain, the sump pump from hell came back. But mau ha ha ha, I got to leave that post as in place I'm sitting at, right when it kicked in.
But that was about it in all today was just busy work plane and simple. See ya'll tomorrow.

Sundy, sunday, sunday

2004-11-21T11:45:00.000-08:00

That's right folks... Come on down and we'll give you deals on wheels where the cars are the stars. All you need to give us is you first born and the next five years worth of your paychecks.

Gee where do I sign up?

I don't know where exactly that came from but it's done now..

Today I'm hellishly tired and don't want to be at work anymore. But it's not something I really have controll over know is it? But there's only an hour left, can't beat that.

Last night was pritty good all said and done. Wiffie went shoping yesterday while I was at work. She was all happy, due to the fact she hasen't been able to go out and get something in like three months. She got some new pants from The Limited. See I love when she getts new clothes becaues then she gets all excited and happy, and it just generally means I'm goanna have a good day too. Anyway she got pants and three canestrers for the kitchen from peir one
. I know what you're thinking.. Canersters for the kitchen? But she has wanted them for like three months now. You know the kind.. those things you put flour and suger into. We had three already but she wanted three more to put pasta and beans and stuff into. I say whatever makes her happy. Right?

Short Sundy Blog..
Sorry I had to train someone all weekend..

Day six

2004-11-17T08:43:00.000-08:00

Let me start of with the O' so obvious.

Corporate Basterd.

Ok now that I got that out. I thing I'm developing turrets or something because I can seem to control my outbursts anymore.. On the bolg, not in person. I've been keeping myself in check at work forever, that's nothing new.

Here's the scam they laid on me...
I get to switch days off from Wed. Thru. to Fri. Sat. Good trade right? Yeah it's the best, but instead of just switching my days the slide me over slowly so this week it's Thru. Fri. off so I work six days in a row. Then next week I work Sat. thru Thur. another six day stretch. But here's the great part.. The way our timesheet lines up it starts on a Sunday and ends on Saturday so a six-day shot still only logs forty hours. That and our policy is work seven days in a row and on the seventh day you get double time and a half, now for me that works out to be about $45.00 an hour. So instead they shaft me into working just enough to hit six day but not enough to make a little good money on the side.

So I say to you again Corporate Basterds.

Got to make my coffee this mourning first thing. So at least I'm in the right frame of mind and not all bitter like yesterday.
That and yesterday word got back to me about someone in HR coming down to my bosses boss and saying how nice it is having me working here, and that I'm always so pleasant to visitors or new hires when they come in the building. See there's two ways to work in this building with the company of for the company. I choose to work with the company. See I understand fully that this is a corporate setting, but we have Gov't standards to fallow too. So when someone comes in for the first time they may not know you can't bring in a Camera phone or items so I'll tell them. So other guards will act as if they already knew they shouldn't have brought in sed item.
But, it's like we're not running a prison, or a concentration camp here. It shouldn't suck to have to come in. That's not how you get repeat customers. And that's the business we're in here, long term repeat costumers i.e. gov't/angencies that feel comfortable signing billion dollar contracts to us for five to ten years terms. Don't you want that person to feel welcome when the come in? Yeah, I think so.

On another work note today I woke up ten whole minutes before I had to leave for work. Always a winner. Dam alarm clock, I think I'm goanna have to get one that can't just add tome to the snooze anymore. See I wake up first at 4am and can hit the snooze two times equaling 20 minutes of flextime. Still having time for showering and other mourning preparations. Now this thing auto adds time in ten-minute increments.
So lets just say hypothetically you have a 4am alarm and maybe you hit the snooze O' about 5 times (or 50 minutes) ok so now you roll over and, bumm bumm bummmm. It's 4:50am not 4:20, crap! You fly out of bed and learn it is possible to both brush you teeth and put on pants at the same exact time. You run down the stairs and almost eat it at the bottom because it's so dark you can't see there are no more steps after the bottom one. Fling open the back door to let the dogs out while putting on shoes. Kiss significant other good-bye and run out the door. All in 10 minutes. Of course that's all hypothetical.
And I did get to work one time. 5-minutes before shift.
Plus for any of you who were keeping track, that means I leave the house at ten to five on most days, and get to work ant ten to six.

The wiffie took today off..
It's all good, she's was only supposed to work part time and was asked and said yes to full time. Now the heifer she works for/with call in sick or with some freaken excuse twice a week like clockwork. She's on salary (the heifer) so it doesn't matter what hours she shows up for, the check is the same. That and apparently she's making like six buck over the wiffie. That sucks, since W can do and does do the same job the heifer does every day.
Now I know what you're thinking D Rant that's mean why do you call her a heifer? Plane and simple, I used o be huge (300+lbs) and have the right to criticize whom ever I choose. That and this lady admitted out loud that she's so huge because she eats all the time, and wont do anything about it. I guess she put on like 100+ lbs in the last year alone. But whatever about that the reason I have all this "rage" is she make the wiffie do her work while she sits there on her personal cell phone and jabbers with her kids. She feels that W is just there to take all the work off of her, freeing her to sit there and become more engorged with food. But on a good note she took almost all last week off and wiffie got a raze out of it since she needed no help and was on top of all that needed to be finished every day. So maybe boss man will she they don't need heifer because she it out dated and not efficient, thus giving wiffie a new title and big stinky raze.

Ok all done with that.

I got put "in charge" of scheduling the guards at their posts for the next month. They acted like it was a difficult task.
Let me break it down some.
We have six places to put people and that's it, you can't have someone start in the same place twice in a row and some people cannot do all tasks due to lake off training. Place people accordingly on a month long schedule.
So ten minutes later I was done with that whole thing and they look at me like I was loony. So then they looked at the schedule then me, then said ok and printed it off. Maybe I just have trouble making stupid tasks look hard. It's not my fault.. it was stupid.. a monkey could have done it just as fast.
O' well so now I look like some kind of form making schedule making mad man. Maybe everyone else should just shut up and step up so we don't look like a joke to everyone that comes in anymore.

Getting Sick

2004-11-16T11:23:00.000-08:00

I'm getting sick!
I hate being sick, especially since I haven't even been in my new job for a week yet. So I am here at work coughing, sneezing, with a fever. Yay, how exciting if I keep feeling worse I'll have to call in sick before I have been with the company for even 1 week.

Later that day....

2004-11-16T11:00:00.000-08:00

I'm feeling better now..

It's getting all nice out. Right now it's:
63 and partly cloudy, nice.. real nice.

I got my coffee too. So I'm adequately caffinated for the remainder of the day. Mmmm false sense of consciousness. I had almost a pot of coffee and it didn't even give me the coffee hands.
Personal Definition of "coffee hands"
That's when you've have so much caffeine placed into your system that typing becomes dam near impossible because your hand is shaking so fast you push every key twice. O' and more good news... I didn't have to eat my can o' tuna after all. My supervisor brought me in a burrito with egg, chorizo, and cheese. That's an old favorite of mine from back when I did concrete. Someone's wife used to always make a big bunch of them to send, and we’d eat them for lunch. Finny thing about lunch in construction is, depending on what you do you might eat lunch at 9 am. Due to the fact that you might have started at 2am.
That and I only have an hour and a half left, thank god.. over here is so boring... all the time.

I'm addicted to playing GTA San Andreas,
See I don't even like to do all the missions, I really like just taking over all the area, buying all the available properties, and making it all my ghetto, or whatever you call it. All you do is run around provoking fights with the other gangs then blam if you can hold them off three times in a row, it's yours. That and it's such a good way to blow like two or three hours away. Tack that on top of the fact that we live an hour or more away from anything good enough to go to, plus the fact that we're broke for the current moment. What else do I have to do to pass the time?

I totally spaced on this...

The other day when I got home I walked in the door and ring ring ring. I answer my phone to G form work on the other end he says, "Hey we have a contractor here that says you took his keys for a badge." Back that jolly trolley up chief. First off that's not how contractors get in the building, either you have access or you don't there's no gray area for discussion. This isn't high school you can't leave a shoe for a pencil from the teacher. So he say's "Well he said it was Mike who let him in and took his keys." To which I say, "Well there were Three Mike's working that day. Which one was he talking about?" He says, "Well I just thought it was you." But that makes me think, well does he think I'm that dumb? I mean does he honestly think I so stupid I would bargen for entire into the building? It's not my fault if someone can't get in.

That and I wonder if the guy came in and said "Hey, the guard took my keys to get into the building." To witch they said, "Who took them, Mike?" See that's what happens you invertently place blame, because now this guy knows someones name is Mike so why not put it on him. Whatever I just blew it off until there was a "blanket E-Mail" today. See that's what they do around here, they don't talk with that person they just send out a general E-Mail out to everyone that implicates no one of fault.

I'm so ready to go home. Not drive home, but go home. I hate the drive home that comes with going home. It takes at least 50 minutes to get home, that's al least that long. That's if I don't have to stop, or run into traffic. But lately I've been having to drive my dad all over hell, he's all hurt right now and the "meds" he's on don't exactly promote safe driving/walking. So twice a week I take him to Physical Therapy and the rest of the time I drive him home before I go home. I know it's just doing my part and I have no problem with that because he's always good for a tank of gas witch is now around $40+ each time along with anything else I need.. ever.

S-10's are not real trucks, and never will be. I'm sorry but S-10's are just cars with big asses at best. not to mention the gear ratio sucks a big fatty too. The engine is a 4.2 liter, now come on my friends BMW is a 4.5 and it hauls ass. Now it know there's no way that a Chevy S-10 is anywhere near a Beamer but still they could make it at least have a decent amount of pick up so it doesn't feel like I'm about to get run over every time I get on the freeway. Now my truck is a 94 and it's got 104,000 miles on it witch is allot but not enough to suck acceleration at that rate. It wasn't my choice to get the dam thing in the first place, I wanted to get a 1500 or a dodge, but the credit score just wasn't there so I had to settle for this piece o' crap instead. I haven't had a time since I bought the thing I wasn't upside down in it.

But I must say it runs.. all the time.. The heater sucks and the AC doesn't blow hard but it starts and runs without fail and averages like 25 miles per gallon. All things considered until I'm making about 10 G's more a year I think I'll just stay with old reliable and hope for the best. Although Nico just got a new car that was a sweet deal, if I could come across one like that I might have to rethink the whole thing.

Here at the shack...(Update)

2004-11-16T05:48:00.000-08:00

Yep, today is here at the guard shack, not the "good" one either. This is the one that is the equivalent of a tin sweatbox. But at least it has a heater right. Yeah yeah I know I live in the AZ but I'm all weak when it comes to cold now. back in Minasota it could be -15 out and I'd still run over to friends with only socks on. Mmmm sauna (heater turned on just now).
I think the thermostat is broken on this thing.. It's getting really hot in here now.. I think I need to crack a window.

(Momentary Insanity)

Dear Shamrock foods Jackass,
I don't care where you have to be or what you have to do...
When you set foot on this property even for ten freaken' seconds you need to sign in your truck and I am required to check the back. If this doesn't work for you, than kiss my ass.

Ok now the background to this outburst of instability.
We have multiple deliveries all day, probably fifty random deliveries all day long. One delivery is a company that drop off the veggies for the cafeteria. So he comes in and starts doin his thing. About five minutes into his delivery in comes shamrock foods man. This guy flys by me doing about 45 mph and by then his already going about 30 mph over for the place he's in. I'm at the edge off the receiving area but it's not that deep so he has to slam on his brakes. Strike two boss. This being a gov't controlled facility we have some pretty strict rules about who comes on property and how they get on. I yell over to him.. he looks. and ignores me.. Strike three.

So I go over to him and ever so "politely" inform him "you can't just come on property without signing in. He says, "yeah I just had to get my dolly, this guy took it." I cordially informed him.. "I don't care, if you're on this property.. ever.. you need to sign in." This basterd rolls his dam eyes at me and loads up his dolly. Now I assumed that since I had just conveyed that he needs to sign in he will do so on the way out. Uuumm nope. He flys by with the say go speed racer theme song blaring away in his head.. So now I have to call my boss and see if we have to track him down... Thank God he says no. But he does say, "The next time that happens lock the gate shut and call patrol over to get all his info."

End of Insanity in 3..2..1..Done

I have no way of getting my caffeine fix this mourning. So now I'm even more pissed, O' and not to mention I just looked at the bank account and there's a whole $1.36 in there until Friday. Gas is about $2.10 a gallon.. Any questions? I'm sorry I just have to vent a little.

But not to worry today I have Two cans of tuna for lunch, mmmm Chicken of the Sea that's good cookin' see I would have loved to bring some of the chili I made yesterday but no I sorry my two demon spawns AKA dogs seemed to thing that our last two zipplock containers doubled as raw hide. So now there's nothing to bring any in because I had to throw them away. Aaahh I just need to relax.

There's really been nothing exciting happing right now. It's all little stuff or just the normal routine. I think however.. it's time to make bread.. mmmm hot fresh bread... Yeah that's it I'll make bread today for questions please see Nadda. I think it'll be egg bread today, it's not much different from you standard white bread, you just use buttermilk instead of regular milk and also add some eggs too. Tadaa egg bread.

Six more hours tell go home time.
And counting...

Busy Day

2004-11-15T13:43:00.000-08:00

Holy crap today I stayed busy... with work.. all day.
But not to worry I have a guard shack tomorrow.. So that means only about eight hours of free time...
So moron today, in the mournin'.

I hope everyone's Monday is going wonderful..
O' yeah, it's raining here too..

Sorry today I'm a slacker.
O and it's funny how if I don't post while at work I feel like I'm slacking off, but really I'm just working.. Hhuumm anyway.

Later

Another Day Another Dollar

2004-11-14T06:05:00.000-08:00

O' back to work for another day of "training" (God help me). But that's ok at least I don't have to walk around by myself for two hour straight.

I'm an addict.
First let me explain..
Back in my younger days I was able to stay up all day all night and everything in the middle. But now I don't know if it's the lack of stimuli here at work or what, but I need caffeine. O' yes that sweet juice of life that keeps me awake through days like this were I've seen four people in two hours and two of them were myself in the mirror. I am a big huge coffee drinker, which it's much of a problem anymore because so it everyone else. But the coffee they make here is horrible, it's like someone poured it threw a used shoe, then to the cup. I know part of it is the water here in the valley. Our tap water suck, it smells of bleach, or whatever the hell the "purify" the water with, that along with however it get to be so hard. No really the water here is so hard that when I shower in the morning every other day I have to use lime Away to clean of the glass because it looks frosted... It's clear.. So I just circumvent the system. I buy my own coffee grounds, usually Starbucks or fresh ground from the store, then get the water from a water dispenser upstairs with a Sparklets jug on it. There for I have the best coffee in a square mile and everyone feels the need to "borrow" a cup. Who borrows coffee? I mean is not like you goanna give it back or make me a good cup of coffee anyway. Just say "hey I'm taken a cup of coffee, and if you ever need one just like the floor instead." That and here the majority of the staff are ex-military, so no offence to the armed forces but ya'll train you men to make some crappy coffee. These guys make some stuff that you not only could stand a spoon in. But if you tried to, the dam thing would throw it back at you.
Wow that was random, I went from how I feel I'm addicted to Caffeine to crappy coffee in the armed forces... Well, I guess I'm still not ready to deal with my addiction.

Last night..
Well lest see I got home and wiffie had made dinner (always great). So I look to the table and it look like Betty Crocker herself came over and mad this.. this.. whatever the hell smells so good. She says I made the potpie crust myself then there's cream, ground turkey (gotta love the Turkey) corn, beans, and carrots in it. It was so nice I didn't want to eat it. She even made a little lattice on the top for show.
Along with some awesome home made mashed potatoes.
Then it was over to the couch to vegg out, but not for long. O' no it was workout night. But first I had to shower. See I have this wired thing about me that if I don't have my morning shower (not that I didn't shower before bed) I feel frecken' gross. So she was like "well I didn't really get ready yet either, I take one too." I was like ok. We shower together all the time, nothing new, we been doing it for about five years now so that means we real shower, not just gaze at each others splendor. But something was different.. there was gazing and then kissing then touching, then moving to the bed and bam, some of the best lovin' we done in a long time. It was the kind you want to pass out from... So I did, O' yeah about twenty minutes after we were done I was out like a light. It was only about fifteen minutes before I woke up, but dam I think those were the best, most relaxed fifteen minutes I've had is at least two months, maybe more. Aahhh but then it was up and out to really work-out. Wiffie's doing good, she determines how long we run for since I can just go dam near forever. But she moved up the every other day distance to two miles. That's great for her, she's not even a "runner." You know the type, those people that just run all the time and talk about "runners Highs" and blah blah blah. Yeah, it's true I've had a runners high, I used to go almost six mile a day when I was going all weight loss crazy, But now I'll just take whatever she wants to do. Just because after the run I lift for about another hour on top of that.
And then in a inspirational move, started by the wonderful Vortexia, P-Riddy and myself took on the job of a little preverbal cleaning of the house on our own blog. Now it looks a little different, but I still feel something is missing... I'll think about it.
Back to work on the page